Choose A Dead-Brand GM Fun Machine: 1995 Olds Cutlass vs 1997 Pontiac Firebird

The automotive enthusiast community in the US seems to have a love/hate relationship with General Motors. The vast majority of its cars are forgettable appliances with uneven reliability records, but when GM gets it right, it can produce some bangers. On the other hand, the company – usually at the management or budgeting level – occasionally makes such boneheaded moves that you wonder whether or not they even like cars.

GM has had so many brands over the years that I doubt anybody could list them all from memory. The company made its fortune by buying up fledgling automakers in the early years. It also has a habit of creating a new brand out of thin air, to great fanfare, and then quietly killing it off a few years later. The result is a ton of dead brand names, some that everybody knows, and some that hardly anyone remembers.

The 2000s were particularly hard on GM brands. The company got into real financial trouble that ended up in a bankruptcy and restructuring, and we lost a lot of brands both before and after that, including two with some real heritage behind them: Oldsmobile and Pontiac. Even during the badge-engineered doldrums of the 1970s and ’80s, these two made GM’s most interesting cars. You could think of them as the cool sisters of Buick and Chevy, and they both had the kind of fun, adventurous energy that GM could use more of today.

For your consideration today, I have found examples of some of Olds and Pontiac’s more compelling 1990s models, for dirt cheap, with only minor things wrong with them. Both offer some open-air opportunities, and both are painted in real colors. Here they are.

1995 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme Convertible – $1,200

Engine/drivetrain: 3.4-liter DOHC V6, four-speed automatic, FWD

Location: Reno, NV

Odometer reading: 118,000 miles

Operational status: Runs well, but needs an alternator to be drivable

GM built about a bazillion W-bodies across four divisions, but only Oldsmobile got a convertible version. Or, I suppose, technically I should call it a cabriolet, because the B-pillars and a hoop connecting them stay in place when the top goes down, like the old VW Rabbits. This allows it to keep the trademark W-body coupe B-pillar door handles. I don’t know if this was the only reason for doing it that way, but it’s the coolest side effect.

There were a couple of different “hot” W-body engines available, but Chevrolet and Oldsmobile opted for a 3.4-liter quad-cam version of the corporate 60-degree V6. You could get this engine in a Chevy Lumina Z34 with a five-speed manual, but I think the Oldsmobiles were automatic-only. I’ve seen a Quad 4-powered Cutlass Supreme with a manual, but never the V6. This one starts and runs just fine, but the seller says it needs to be trailered because the alternator is shot. This, of course, means you should replace the battery too, because a bad alternator will often take the battery out with it.

This is about as fancy as a W-body gets inside, with power leather seats and a host of buttons on the steering wheel. It’s the later facelifted dash design, which is more European in layout than the stodgy original design. It looks like it’s in decent shape inside, but it doesn’t have all that many miles on it either.

Outside, the paint is faded and the clearcoat is coming off, but it looks straight. The seller describes the top as “worn,” but I don’t see any obvious tears or damage. We don’t get any photos with the top down, either, but maybe that’s because the bad alternator doesn’t generate enough juice for the power top. It’s worth asking to make sure it works, though. It also appears to have one mismatched wheel, on the right rear; I think that’s a Pontiac Grand Prix wheel, of the same size, but slightly different design.

1997 Pontiac Firebird – $1,500

Engine/drivetrain: 3.8-liter OHV V6, four-speed automatic, RWD

Location: Reno, NV

Odometer reading: 183,000 miles

Operational status: Runs and drives well, but won’t pass smog

Pontiac’s Firebird was always just enough different from its sister model, the Chevy Camaro, to make it its own thing. And the Firebird was always the cooler of the two, and often the better-looking. I’m not crazy about the fourth-generation Camaro and Firebird in general, but I will say that Pontiac managed to make its version look less bulbous, especially in the base trim like this.

Base model Firebirds at one time had as little as 90 horsepower, from an Iron Duke four-cylinder, but by the end, even the cheapest Firebird was rocking 200 horsepower, thanks to a Buick-derived 3800 Series II V6. This one is backed by a 4L60-E overdrive automatic, which suits the car’s character just fine. This one runs and drives well, but it won’t pass Nevada’s emissions test (and by extension, probably any emissions test), so if you need it to, you’ll have to figure out what’s wrong and fix it. If you don’t, well, then the choice to fix it is up to you.

The V6 and the automatic are all right, but the base-model Firebird interior is pretty uninspiring. It might as well be a Cavalier inside. These cookie-cutter gray GM interiors are functional, but they’re just so drab. I guess if you turn the stereo up loud enough, you can forgive a boring interior. And by the way, this one does have T-tops; I know some of you complain every time I post a slick-top F-body. You needn’t worry here.

It appears to be in decent shape outside, but the nose is a slightly different shade of red than the rest of it. I think it has been replaced and not color-matched properly. But who cares? It’s a good-running Firebird with T-tops for fifteen hundred bucks. Nobody is going to complain about some mismatched paint, and if they do, tell them to get lost; you don’t need that kind of negativity.

These are both cheap enough to be impulse purchases for a lot of people, and that can get kind of dangerous. It’s easy to make snap decisions on cheap cars, and regret it later. But neither one of these is really going to drop further in value, either; keep them in running condition, and you can always at least break even. So it’s just a matter of which one you’d rather bomb around in: the drop-top Olds, or the T-top Firebird?