Some people just love a car with all the bells and whistles. Power equipment and luxury touches aren’t options to them; they’re requirements. Others just look at all that stuff and see more things to break, and prefer a plainer, simpler motoring experience. Whichever side of that particular fence you’re on, I’ve got you covered today.
Yesterday we looked at a couple of trucks that needed some work. You know the old saying “looks aren’t everything”? I think we disproved it. The cool-looking Dodge pickup that needed a little mechanical love took an easy win over the good-running but hideous Ford Bronco.
I don’t blame you. When I first clicked on the Bronco ad, I assumed it was a derelict husk with way too high of an asking price. When I read that it actually ran and drove well, I decided to feature it, but I still didn’t (and don’t) want it. I have no need for that Dodge either, but if it’s between those two, there’s no contest.
If you’re a budget-conscious car lover, you know that used luxury cars, once they reach a certain age, can be found really cheap. Depreciation hits high-end cars much harder than it does mid-level models, so getting your hands on the fancy version can be as simple as waiting a few years. The values of cheap, simple economy cars drop like a rock as well, but after a while, nostalgia can start pushing prices of really clean examples back up. And that is how you end up with our two contenders today: the most expensive Jaguar of its day, and the cheapest Ford, now available for the same price. Let’s check them out.
1985 Jaguar XJ12 Sovereign HE – $3,500
Engine/drivetrain: 5.3-liter OHC V12, three-speed automatic, RWD
Location: Hercules, CA
Odometer reading: 114,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
As we all know, if you want to import a car into the US yourself, it has to be at least 25 years old. But that wasn’t always the case; before that law was passed in 1988, you could pretty much stick any car on a cargo ship, bring it over, make a couple of changes to things like lights and bumpers and emissions equipment, and you were good to go. Such cars were referred to as “gray-market” imports; they didn’t come through official channels, but they were more or less legal to own and drive. I suspect that this Jaguar is such a gray-market car, based on two things: first, Jaguar stopped selling the XJ12 in the US in 1980, and second, the Sovereign nameplate wasn’t used on high-level US model Jaguars; ours were called Vanden Plas.
Even though you couldn’t buy an XJ12 from Jaguar in the US in 1985, all the components were there, which probably made converting this car pretty easy. It uses the same “High Efficiency” (ha!) V12 engine and GM Turbo-Hydramatic 400 transmission as the XJS coupe, and the same body design as the XJ6. It was probably just a matter of fitting US-market XJ6 bumpers and side-marker lights, and maybe adding a catalytic converter from an XJS. It runs and drives well, according to the seller, but it does need to pass a smog test, and I don’t know how that works with gray-market cars. Knowing California, it probably involves some ritual chanting and possibly a blood sacrifice.
No matter which side of the Atlantic it was intended for, the interior of a Series III XJ is a nice place to be. This one looks all right; there’s a tear in one seat bolster and some wear on the carpet, but for the most part, the leather and wood are holding up nicely. One thing does need attention, however; the seller says the air conditioning is disconnected. I’m sure a specialty shop could get it hooked back up and running again, but at a price.
Outside, it has a few minor blemishes, but for the most part, it carries itself with the dignity and grace befitting an old Jaguar. The paint and chrome are both nice and shiny, and I would be very surprised if it had any rust. It’s got those cool “pepperpot” wheels, too, that you don’t see on US-market XJs.
1987 Ford Escort Pony – $3,500
Engine/drivetrain: 1.9 liter OHC inline 4, four-speed manual, FWD
Location: Santa Rosa, CA
Odometer reading: 61,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
All kinds of things that are available in Europe take on a different form here in the US. English hard cider like Strongbow and Blackthorn have added sugar here, to suit what they think are American tastes. We can’t get actual Kinder Eggs, because apparently we can’t be trusted to not let kids choke on the toys. And when Ford finally offered its celebrated Escort compact in the US, it was in a fattened-up, watered-down form that barely shared any parts with the European version at all.
The Escort was sold in a wide range of trims, but what we have here is the most basic of them all: the Pony model. It has no air conditioning, no power steering, nothing on the dash but a speedometer and a fuel gauge, and only four forward gears in its manual transmission. The engine is the same CVH four-cylinder as other Escorts, both American and European, displacing 1.9 liters and putting out 90 horsepower thanks to throttle-body fuel injection. This one has only 61,000 miles on it and has been treated to a fresh timing belt, along with new front brakes, new tires, and a new battery.
The interior of the Pony version was even plainer than regular Escorts, which weren’t what you’d call luxury cars to begin with. I had a couple friends with these, and I seem to remember the seats being fairly comfy, though not as good as Omni/Horizon seats, but the interior being pretty noisy on the highway. I think Ford skimped on the sound-deadening on the Pony model. Oddly, it does have one power feature, and it’s one you probably don’t want: motorized seat belts. I didn’t know these were available in the Escort as far back as 1987. I’ve had Fords with automatic belts before, and you get used to them, like you get used to anything, but they’re a safety feature I’m glad is dead and gone these days.
I have to make a confession: I actually have always liked the style of these cars, especially the two-door hatchback like this. They were everywhere for a long time, but time has had its way with most of them, and now seeing one this clean is a bit of a treat. It’s a pretty good color, too. I believe the plastic wheel covers are aftermarket, or from another Escort; as far as I remember, the Escort Pony came with nothing but silver-painted plain steel wheels.
Some people like their cars nice and simple; others want all the toys. And some people, like my dad, change their minds after a while: the same guy who once special-ordered a slant-six Plymouth Barracuda with no options, and was too cheap to pay for a factory stereo in a new VW Golf, bought for his last car a Chrysler 300C with damn near every option in the book on it. Dad’s gone now, and the Chrysler is mine, and I have to admit all the power toys are nice to have. But I do miss his old stripper models. There’s an earnestness there that you don’t often get with cars these days. But what about you? Given the choice between a Jaguar so fancy it wasn’t even offered here, and the barest-bones Ford Escort ever to roll out of the factory, which one are you driving off in?
I can be a Sovereign Citizen or an old Escort. I’ll take the Escort. It’s clean and unabused.
The Jag makes for a classier driveway ornament when it’s broke, so Jag.
JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG!
Well, this was easy…V12 Jag vs. an ugly junk Fix Or Repair Daily/Found On Road Dead? (one of the worst cars ever made) I will fix up that awesome V12 really good, then enjoy cruising in luxury and style. I would take an escort, just not the Ford kind, ha ha
You know it’s fix or repair daily because it’s reliable enough to run everyday. That 12 cylinder Jag Just a Gamble is going to work less days than a union school teacher.
This is one of those days I’d like a both option as well – went Jag because V12, has A/C to get working again and its a Jaaaaaag
This is a neither day for me. A V-12 Jag would likely cost more to keep running than I want to pay. The Escort averaged 1,600 miles per year? Was it owned by a parsimonious little old lady from Pasadena who only drove it church on Sundays? And I HATE motorized seatbelts.
The Escort only has 61k miles because no one could bear to drive it any further
I can remember my crazy uncle having one escort after another I think every 2 years he would get one because his previous one blew up. He moved to lebarons after that and got more out of them. So I want nothing to do with an escort. The jag and is a bit sketchy but things can be done with them. They have twin tbi setups for them that removes most of the lucus stuff. So jagggg.
Forget the cars, please tell this Brit (who grew up in the cider capital of the world, Somerset) how Strongbow and Dry Blackthorn count as ‘hard’ cider?!
In the US, “hard” = alcoholic, as opposed to the cloudy plastic jugs of fresh-pressed apple juice sold at every farmer’s market and corn maze in the fall as “cider.” We’re lame and don’t use the language properly. I know.
Hey Brits speak English in the US we speak American, but there are similarities
Got it, thank you. You can probably guess I’ve never been to the US.
It would take a small fortune to put right – but I want that Series III V12.
There’s no way I’m paying 35 Benjamins for an almost 40 year old stripper Escort.
Yeah, I’d rather spend it on strippers and escorts…
I wanted to go with the Jag, but being a California resident who’s had to deal with smog headaches on 80’s cars, and seeing that its a grey market V12 British car with an “unknown reason” salvage title, I’d run, not walk, away from this thing.
“Buyer is responsible for getting smog” is a translation for “we tried to get it to pass and it wouldn’t so now this is your nightmare to deal with”
Another thing that gives me pause- in California, the license plate usually stays with the car, and it’s absent in these photos. Now, it’s very possible that the seller removed them to take these pics, but my spidey sense is telling me this car hasn’t been registered or had plates in California in a while (or ever??). Your best bet on this car is to take it to a different state and start over because its not getting registered here.
Edit: I did some digging and this car is being sold by a business called “Rodeo used Cars” in Rodeo CA, and from images of other cars they have, they seem to take the plates off their cars for some reason.
The odd history of this car, combined with the fact that its being sold by a “dealer” who is doing some under the table stuff to get around selling an un-smogable car (the CL listing is categorized as “for sale by owner”) makes me even more turned off to this whole deal.
Just don’t own it in California, Arizona is just over the border.
In 1997 I took a work trip to Munich, we had an Escort as a rental. I had dropped a coworker off a the airport and was heading back to the hotel in the Escort, my first time driving it. This car was a far from the US ford as possible in so many was, but of course the real way was once on the Autobahn, I was gleefully traveling at the posted (due to weather) 200kph without drama or effort.
I almost always pick the brown option, but this is an old Jaaag, with no coolant reservoir cap and a V12 that will cost you an arm and leg in fuel and to keep maintenance with so I’ll say give me the barebones Escort so I can remove the newer gen hubcaps and probably try to rent it for movies and sitcoms based in the 80s or 90s. I really have no interest for it but it might serve a better purpose than a potential 2-Ton, gray-market lawn ornament
Usually I want at least one of the two cars offered here. But these two… gosh. I feel like there’s just no way to make either of them reliable.
Escort, if anything for its simple earnestness.
Interestly enough, as basic as this Escort is, it’s downright luxurious compared to my first Ranger, a base ’97 XL. Carpet? Cloth seating? A radio?? This Escort is Diamond Jim Certified compared to my (newer) Ranger.
Even tho you can go and stay with people for the weekend, help yourself to their belongings, and no one will mind because you have a Jaaaaaag, I’m going with the Escort since the first car I bought was an 87 GT with those motorized seat belts and if I remember correctly it was also $3,500 in 1992 with 30,000 miles.
I’m kind of feeling that Escort. I have developed an unhealthy obsession with mundane everyday throwaway crapcans from the 80s. Whenever I see an inexplicably-well-preserved example of a car like this, I get warm fuzzies way down deep. I’d like to buy this one and gift it to my friend who had a white 88 Escort Pony when we were in high school. It was the slowest car I’ve ever driven and my first exposure to the half-assed automotive “innovation” that was TBI.
TBI? Traumatic Brain Injury? Oh… Throttle Body Injection? One is a bit better than a carburetor. The other isn’t.
80’s kid here… I remember many summer days in the back seat of a white Escort, with my older brother punching me for every fucking VW bug he saw, whether real or imagined, while both parents smoked cigs up front… with both windows up. WTF. Fuck Escorts with my whole heart. Gimme the headache jag
Get the Jag then swap in a GM crate engine 😉
I’d love to have an older Jag one day.
Just not that one.
I try to consider the better deal, and this one is tough. The Jaguar is all right, but I actually leaned toward the Escort for low mileage and standard transmission. Had it been junkier, I’d drive the Jag, but I’d rather roll the windows down and poke around in the 2 door Ford.
Since the a/c on the Jag is disconnected, you’d still have to lower the windows down in it. The Escort with its manual transmission would probably be more reliable and more fun to drive, but those belts!!
Between my deep hatred of both 80s ford escorts and motorized seat belts. I would rather look at a broken Jag in my driveway than drive an escort. and this jag currently runs.
I don’t think I have ever owned a true base model, and part of me will mourn the death of simple cars, but that is rarely what I want. Other people need simple cars, but I live in a city where I can bike to work, and I like to have a nice car for road trips/camping and a sporty car for fun. That Ford would be an excellent commuter… for someone else.
Give me the Jaaaaaag for those sweet wheels.
There is nothing wrong with the escort but nothing right either. Gimme the adventure of a sketchy origin V12 with broken AC.
My first car was an escort, but with the fancy 5 speed and those damn electric seat belts. It had 235k miles as a commuter in the heart of the rust belt. It was a complete piece of shit but I loved it.