I actually rather like the small delivery robots you see trundling around many bigger cities today. They’re little boxes on wheels (I had a similar idea for these back in 2015, just saying), and they have a certain friendly charm about them, avoiding the unsettling quality that many humanoid robots have. They’re somehow endearing, and when I see one stuck or confused, my brain anthropomorphizes them to such a degree that I feel like I should help it. That said, if one of these things blocks an emergency vehicle like an ambulance or fire truck, they should just run the little bastards over.
I bring this up because just recently, a video went viral of one of these delivery robots crossing a street and blocking the path of a fire truck that was quickly driving down the road, lights and sirens glaring and blaring. The delivery bot, while it had the right of way to cross the road, didn’t seem to understand what to do when the fire truck approached, and dithered confusedly in the middle of the road, causing the fire truck to come to a complete stop for about five precious seconds before the robot finally got out of the way.
Here’s the video, in case you missed it:
@kasseyisrich So like…who has the right of way? ???????????? Love seeing the response to this video, LA is full of insane moments like this! Usually, I share wardrobe styling bts and tips so stay tuned for more fashion related content! #jet2holiday #losangeles #fyp @Serve Robotics @LAFD Foundation ????
That little delivery robot, which was made by a company called Serve, genuinely seemed to panic there in front of the fire truck, if you’ll allow me even more anthropomorphization. I know it can’t actually panic, being a robot, but I also know that these things are supposed to have some ability to recognize emergency vehicles and, presumably, get out of the way. Clearly, this one did not.
That got me thinking: there really needs to be a better way to deal with this problem. We’re just getting started with delivery robots like this, and it’s not unreasonable to think that there will be more and more of these around, which means more potential to encounter emergency vehicles, and more opportunities for the robots to screw up and cause potentially life-threatening delays. I’ve been in an ambulance, pretty adjacent to dying; in so many cases, it’s not an exaggeration to say that every second counts.
I don’t think this is a problem we can expect the software in one of these little bot’s silicon brains to solve. There’s just too many variables out there in the real world to guarantee success here. We need a solution that is dumb and simple and basic, something with about the same level of complexity as just running the things over.
But not running them over; that’s not really a viable solution because people paid good money for their McRibs or whatever, and it would be immoral to deprive them of those. I’m kidding! No one gives a shit if someone doesn’t get their burrito when there’s an ambulance or fire truck involved! The reason we can’t just run these over is that the bots are just too big; they’re over two feet tall or so, and there’s too great a risk of the bot getting trapped under the axle of an emergency vehicle and bringing everything to a halt.
No, this is a solution that requires us to go back almost 200 years or so, to the early days of steam locomotives. Even back then, trains wanted to avoid hitting things that wandered onto the tracks, things like cows, so the cowcatcher was invented by Isaac Drips, who fit one to the locomotive John Bull in 1833.
The cowcatcher is that angled assembly of iron on the front there, designed to catch and shunt things like cows away from the front of the train and off the tracks. We need a similar sort of thing on emergency vehicles to deal with wayward delivery bots:
I’m thinking something like what you see above: a curved cowcatcher-like device, made of flexible but strong plastic, that would be mounted to the bumper of ambulances and fire trucks. I’m calling it the Delivery Bot Shunting Beak (DBSB), and it works exactly like you’re probably already imagining:
The emergency vehicle wouldn’t even need to slow down. It just drives on its path, and if a delivery bot is in the way, it gets caught and shunted out of the driving path of the truck. If it’s still upright and undamaged, it should be free to re-orient itself and complete its delivery (the food inside may be a mess, though) or at that point the delivery company can deal with it; it’s not our problem.
Simple! No software to deal with, no complex sensors or electronics, just big curved pieces of plastic that should prove to be quite cheap to install on emergency vehicles.
There must be some fire department out there willing to build a prototype one of these and give it a test, right? Let me know, and maybe we can set this up and shoot an exciting video or something!
I can’t imagine dying because the emergency vehicle had to wait on Minimum Wage Wall-e
A loyal wingman style wheeled vehicle big enough to punt or PIT maneuver away any offending shitbot with just enough force to not cause more mayhem could work. Also use high def footage of the encounter to shame, or fine, shitbot developers and owners.
Yeah, I agree w/ running over these fuckers…
A reminder that a cow can still derail a train in the modern age; https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polmont_rail_accident
There’s a running joke in the show Platonic (Rose Byrne is hilarious) where Seth Rogan’s character kicks and tosses any electric scooter or delivery robot that crosses his path. Pretty damn funny… and a great show. https://www.tiktok.com/@appletv/video/7535521587110497567
As I believe somebody below commented, the delivery robot is not likely to survive being shunted out of the way. And maybe that’s okay. The cow-catcher didn’t gently set the cow back on the side of the tracks either.
to be clear, we’re just trying to get the thing out of the way with no damage to the firetruck, right? I mean that cowcatcher you have in the picture looks like it’s going to create dead cows. There’s no ‘shunting it away so it can go on delivering it.’ We’re destroying it, and we don’t care. If we’re worried about dead robots littering the streets then we require them to have a blackbox and transponder before they get a license to operate and require the operators to clean up their dead bots.
That cow catcher looks like it butchers the cow, then tosses the steaks on a coal fired grill. In fact, I think that mailbox looking thing on the front of the train is a steam powered meat grinder.
Not to be a Debbie Downer, but would a fire truck really need a cow catcher thing to push a delivery robot out of the way? Unless you’re expecting delivery robots to get bigger and heavier over time, maybe to the point where they resemble Sherman tanks? 😉 Until then, the firetruck or ambulance or cop car can just plow through, leaving 100 pounds of debris (plus someone’s lunch from Chipotle) scattered in the road, no?
I see those robots whenever I drive through downtown Hollywood. I also see them in plenty of videos of central Moscow. They seem to be in a lot of cities. They are cute, and less off-putting than those headless robot dogs.
What I’m listening to while composing this reply:
“Ain’t Got Your Money” by the Ruby Friedman Orchestra
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vHkGDRRmcQ0
https://www.rubyfriedmanorchestra.com
I think the concern is that there’s a non-zero chance that the delivery robot could damage the emergency vehicle while being run over. Once crushed, how can we be sure parts of it won’t be sharp enough to puncture a tire, sever a wire, or damage the brakes (Note: I’m not very knowledgeable about air brakes like a fire truck would have, I don’t know how easy they are to damage, just thinking of things that you’d find under the vehicle and don’t want damaged. Ambulances are probably more likely to have their brakes damaged by a delivery robot though)?
Crushing a delivery robot by running it over also disrupts regular traffic by creating an enormous amount of potentially sharp debris, potentially causing even more emergencies for emergency vehicles to respond to.
So… yeah, I’m inclined to agree with Torch that a cowcatcher is likely the best solution. Bumping the delivery robot out of the way will still certainly damage it to the point of no longer functioning, but that’s only one large traffic obstruction you can still drive around. It’s unlikely to spread hazardous debris everywhere.
Unlikely, unless it’s delivering Taco Bell.
The fairly large lithium ion battery would like to have a second opinion about being non-hazardous. After it gets crushed, there is a near 100% chance that the fire truck would be making a call back to that site to put out a battery fire.
The only potential problem I see with the DBSB is if you hit something square in the middle at the tip of the beak and an impalement occurs.
Perhaps expand the name to Delivery Bot Shunting Beak Skewer Mechanism (DBSBSM)?
I’m thinking drivers would be trained to hit the target slightly off-center to avoid this. But that would assume all bots would freeze still like this one. If they’re a moving target it would be more difficult.
Easy solution, rounded beak. Maybe even with a roller in the middle. It’ll eventually slide to one side or the other.
Here’s my legal question – do inanimate objects not controlled by a human actually have right of way in a pedestrian crossing?
I have to deal with these suckers every day I work (they are directly competing with me) and they are stupid. They gather into a little herd at the main road crossing, and have trouble making it across the road even when they have the light. Each one moving triggers the next one so they both give up on crossing. Sometimes 20 or more will get stuck there for 30 minutes or so. They did make it better when they changed the route they take such that the one crossing to get to the dorms use one side of the intersection, and the ones coming back use the other side.
Cowpusher
I think it needs to be deployable, because that shunter could reduce the approach angle of the emergency vehicle.
I think a thick rubber skirt under the bumper and toward the wheels would be plenty, and it could also be deployable, like a Mk4 Supra’s splitter.
What in tarnations? Thankfully we don’t have these in our big cities up here, or at least I never seen one. Never even knew this existed.
Works great at protests, too
Even better, mount a grabby claw, and the firefighters get a meal en-route to their emergency.
Yeah, but you know those claws always drop the prize right at the last minute. 😉
I have a solution that is better in two ways: one, it doesn’t fling 150 pound jerkbots at pedestrians, and two, it involves magnets! or grabber claws!
Fire truck should have a hydraulic arm with either a big electromagnet or a grabber claw like the ones used in a junkyard. The offending robobox gets picked up and stowed in the truck. Firefighters get a free snack after the fire’s out. New city ordinance also provides that the vendor must pay a substantial fine to ransom back its equipment, or it is forfeit.
Look at the garbage trucks with the can grapple on the front.
Exactly. And it’s like the arcade game with the claw and the stuffed animals
It should also be capable of picking up robotaxis. Someone will need to look into the legality of ransoming any passengers.
What’s with these gravity challenged wheeled monstrosities? I thought tacos were supposed to be delivered by FLYING drones.
I believe Mr. Burns has a cow catcher that deploys from the front of his (front wheel drive??) Rolls Royce, so the technology must exist. He would probably charge a hefty licensing fee though.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJgGIj06-VY
To be fair, that truck could just have gone over that wheeled box as-is
I think it needs to be something that can deploy and retract as needed, because it would add significant length to an already long vehicle. Also, especially in big cities, there are a lot of old firehouses that can barely accommodate the rigs as they are.
Just make it a little bigger and use it to move cars too.
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/4kVCw_XaM4U
This
Mythbusters did it better.