Here at Monterey Car Week, things tend to kick off with an event called Motorlux, which is basically what happens when you close down the Monterey Airport and fill it up full of fantastic cars, some airplanes and helicopters, a lot of booze and fancy food that is trickier to eat while trying to balance a drink and not dump it sloppily all over your dressy clothes, and then flood the whole place with a lot of rich people and an awful lot of eager gearheads.
It’s a fun, decadent time, and I was there, acting as your eyes, ears, and, yes, bladder. For those of you that couldn’t make it because of the cruel realities of distance, resources, and, very likely, restraining orders, allow me to share with you some of the automotive highlights of the event.
Oh, I should remind you that these highlights are ones that are filtered though my eyes and brain and all the related fetishes and obsessions that are contained therein, so consider this a disclaimer. Let’s get going!
Oh, first I should show you that our Murano Cross Cab is now hobnobbing with a higher class of fellow automobile. No more Festivas up on blocks for our Cross Cab! Now it’s devaluing self-satisfied Rolls-Royce SUVs!
This seems to be a 1950something Alfa Romeo CS Touring Superleggera, but it has all sorts of interesting and peculiar details, which I helpfully pointed out in this reel I happen to have handy:
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This window beading is the detail that fascinates me the most; I’ve never seen anything like that before? I mean on a car, at least – it sure looks like what I remember old payphone handset cords looked like.
Also, for automotive lighting fetishists like myself, this pictures gives so very much: the racing-chic X of tape on the headlights, that wonderfully peculiar gridded green tea-colored indicator lens, that wonderful old driving lamp. So good.
There was a new Morgan three wheeler there, and if your goal is to have the most arachnid-like car possible, this is your solution. Hey look, I have another reel for that!
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There was also a new Morgan Plus 4 there, and we’ll be looking deeper into these soon, but at the moment I just have a question:
What do we think the odds are that these use the same wiper blades – and perhaps arms – as the old three-wiper MGB/Midgets? I bet the odds are pretty damn good.
Our buddy Matt Farah was there with his three-cylinder radial-powered Meyers Manx. I’m not sure I’ve seen someone so delighted with a car in a long time. It was a pleasure to see.
If you’re an HR Geiger fan, you may like this. It’s fascinating and also a bit unsettling. This is the metal 3D-printed chassis of the Czinger, and the chassis elements have been designed and optimized in such a way that they use the minimum amount of material to get maximum strength, a process that leaves them looking like…bones. Biological bones.
I mean, look at these things: they’re all pelvises and clavicles and coccyxes up in there. I suppose this is a reminder that evolution is powerful and managed to get highly efficient bone structures over eons, but it sure is jarring in this context.
If you told me that instead of bodies, they had a process to grow skin and muscle and sinew over these chassis, I’d believe it, as I internally recoiled in horror at the idea of a car that could get sweaty.
This is a really charming Lambretta scooter, and I want to show you specifically the badge on this one:
Look at that little black sheep, making trouble and kicking up what look to be lowercase “i”s. This made me wonder if the name Lambretta is somehow related to, you know, lambs, but it seems it’s named for a suburb of Milan. Oh well.
These Alfa Romeo SZs are so incredible; I’m not sure I’d call these six-eyed angular wonders pretty, but they’re striking as hell and they make an impression anywhere they end up.
I didn’t realize that Fiat is bringing the new low-speed EV Topolinos to America! They’ll be about $15,000, limited to either 19 or 25 mph, and are really clever and fun little cars. As a Changli owner, I can say that a 25 mph car is actually far more useful than you may realize, in the right contexts. These are fun, I’m glad they’re coming here, and, shockingly, compared to most golf carts, that price isn’t bad. I know, I know.
We’ve seen this amazing cube-ified Volkswagen Type 2 before, and I’m happy to see it again. It’s like a cartoon escaped into our reality, and I welcome it.
This seems to just be a stock 1964 Opel Kadett Sport Coupe, but holy hell is it just charming. Simple and charming.
It’s unpretentious and straightforward, detailed in just the right way, wearing a tasteful amount of chrome – what a satisfying little car.
If you thought harlequin cars were just for VWs, you’re only half right! Look at this marvelous harlequin 911! The color choices are fantastic, like various sherbets, and look on the inside:
It’s like a thrift store vigorously humped a Porsche catalog, and here’s the glorious, gingham/plaid/denim/corduroy result!
The most recent bb-Auto Porsche was here, resplendent in gold, and it looked fantastic. Plus, look at this serendipitous visitor, making a lovely visual and chromatic poem:
Let’s get closer to this bee on the bb:
So good. Thanks for showing up and dressing the part, little bee.
Our partner Beau loaned his amazing Biscuter to the event, the finest Voisin-designed Spanish microcar of all time.
Have you taken a moment to consider just how huge the turn indicators are on a Ferrari 512 BBi? They’re massive. They may be the largest turn signals of any car, in square area. I should look into that.
Speaking of turn signals, this incredible Chapron-designed Citroën DS Décapotable has some really lovely ones. Since this is a convertible, the DS’s traditional roof-horn-mounted indicators couldn’t stay, so they needed to be redesigned and relocated. This is the result:
Subtle, elegant, functional – an absolute turn signallic triumph.
This ’78 Super Beetle convertible was in stunning shape. Super Beetles tend not to be as collectible as pre-’68 Beetles, so I’m always happy to see them in this context.
I never really understood this trim piece on ’73-’80 Super Beetles. Was it to hide a weld seam? It’s odd.
This Fiat rally car is a boxy wonder; it’s so purposeful and rational, like an appliance built for speed and handling.
This bubble-topped Jaguar XK racing car was magical. Feels like it should be the car for some ’50s-era super hero called the Jagnoir, or something.
It’s already called “the Black Cat” as it is, after all.
Earlier, I mentioned that the Morgan three-wheeler was ideal if you were seeking out insectile/arachnile cars. If crustacean is your automotive jam, I think this Delahaye is your answer.
Also, if you’ve always wanted a car with little square-shaped hood vents, that Delahaye is also for you.
I never get tired of looking at Alfa Romeo Montreals. Those vents on the B-pillar area! Why are they so good?
Okay, finally, one last detail: did you know these Mercedes-Benz G-Wagen G500 soft tops had that funny triangularish plastic window there? I’d never seen that. What a weird little window! Why isn’t it bigger? Look how much unbroken canvas there is behind it? Why doesn’t the angle match up with the other triangular window there? I guess because of the ribs of the top? I have so many questions.
Oh one other question: why the hell do hotels do this?
Why put a toilet paper roll in a weird little sack? Is it too distasteful to see the roll itself? Does this help? It looks like the sack containing the most disappointing gift a two-foot-tall Santa Claus could deliver. Or maybe it looks like a laundry bag. It’s just stupid!
I also have more things to do and see! So I can then relay them to you! To enjoy, judge, feel, whatever!
These are all…fucking fantastic!
I think the toilet paper roll is in a sack to prevent it from getting wet, maybe from exiting the shower or something.
Torch’s reports on his visits to auto shows are perfect. They are unhinged, insightful, and save me the wear and tear. Never change, Jason!
It’s a toilet paper cozy! When I was a kid, I often encountered these in the bathrooms of certain older relatives. (Of course, these versions were crocheted from some kind of acrylic-based pastel yarn.)
I bet the Lambretta was the most likely vehicle for a Minor Threat reference at Motorlux. Or maybe the Bug. Still wildly unexpected at such a fancy affair.
Some really nice stuff there. Must be a pleasure to attend these events in person!
Rare Citroën Turn Signals: in select theaters for a limited engagement.
Jason’s outfit is on point like a laser….
https://www.tiktok.com/@chamberlin_kevin/video/6933364985179458822?lang=en
Thanks for being our eyes, ears, and bladder. The CrossCab looks better than the Rolls in that parking lot.
They look really… dumb in person. I was thinking , “ugly,” “horrible,” “cheesy,” but “dumb” fits better. Like, “why the heck would you do that, you dummy?”
Nah, I’m glad they exist, even if I wouldn’t buy one. So many of the cars on the road are anonymous blobs, usually painted gray or silver. It’s nice to see something out of the ordinary.
I was referring to the RR, not our beloved red-headed stepchild CrossCab!
Ah, well in that case I whole-heartedly agree. The proportions of the RR just don’t work.
That Rolls looks like it’s giving some serious side eye to the CrossCab
That ugly Rolls looks like the deadbeat dad of the slab-sided Jaguar 00.
Oliver!!!!!!
That Lambretta badge is amazing! It’s a musical reference that David would surely know: It’s the black sheep from a Minor Threat album cover bit of artwork. I know this because my favorite bike shop (TriCity Bicycles in Rochester NH) uses the same sheep with the legs holding wheels.
You think David listens to the progenitors of hardcore punk, last active in 1983? Their discography is important (fits on one CD and is in my top five albums), but I’d bet dinner that David does not listen to them.
I’m 100% sure David has no idea about that Minor Threat sheep or their music. It always funny when he misses popular culture references. I guess in my social circles, Minor Threat is musically relevant and popular.
Subtitle: Motorlux Goes Goblin Mode
Here Are All…, pretty please.