“Ding-dong!” rang the doorbell on a random Thursday evening right around dinnertime, rustling me away from my usual evening spent reading the daily excellent work of my friends and colleagues at The Autopian. Upon opening the door, I was greeted by a neighbor from a few houses down on the other side of the block. Outside of a friendly wave and a smile while I passed him mowing his lawn or otherwise out in his yard, I had never really interacted with him.
Though I wasn’t unhappy to see him, my heart immediately sank nonethless – I have four cars street-parked near his place, and my thoughts immediately went to a worst-case scenario where he was stopping by with bad news about one of them, such as a sideswipe, hit-and-run, etc.
Instead of the expected news that one of my cars had a sad fate befall it, he instead introduced himself as Billy and asked if I was a mechanic working out of my house, as he had consistently seen me working on car after car in my driveway over the years. I greeted him warmly:
“Nice to finally meet you. I actually work at Verizon, but I just really, really love cars and have a few too many, as you can tell!”
That was met by a nervous, uncomfortable forced laughter and a polite smile. It usually is.
Let’s Diagnose!
Billy told me that the beautiful, dark metallic-blue Town Car that I’ve been seeing in his driveway since I moved to this neighborhood nine years ago was now giving him some trouble. He explained he has kids and grand-kids and funds are tight, and was wondering what I’d charge to fix a grinding noise that was coming from his engine bay along with a failed rear air suspension. I told him that I’d have to hear the engine noise in person and that I’d need to research parts cost/availability and the difficulty of the air suspension job (I’m YouTube Certified, yo!) before committing to the job.
After a short walk to Billy’s place, I had a look at the big, beautiful, blue boat. He was right about the failed air suspension: the rear end of the car was laying dangerously close to the ground, and one errant curb on a tight turn or an ambitious speed bump could easily catch a rear bumper cover edge and damage it or rip it off.
Billy popped the hood and fired up the engine so I could hear the grinding noise, and it only took about five seconds to discern the raucous cacophony of dissonance was coming from a failed serpentine belt idler pulley bearing. Billy was in luck; that’s a super easy fix on a Ford “Modular” 4.6 V8 engine like the one in the nose of Billy’s Town Car, and with prime parts accessibility at the counter of every neighborhood parts store in America, it wouldn’t be an expensive fix.
Also, lucky for Mr. Billy, the old theme about American cars being cheap and easy to work on held true for the suspension job as well, as steel suspension springs to replace the failed air bags were widely available and super cheap for this ancient Panther Platform Lincoln. I’m guessing that this is due to the air suspension being a common, widely known fail point. Aftermarket parts providers are in the business of selling parts for broken cars that need ‘em, and nearly all those air-suspended Lincolns will need this repair eventually. Rubber ages and cracks with time, and those rubber bags can only hold compressed air for so long.
I told my good neighbor that I’d commit to doing both repair jobs for a cost of $200 in labor (stupid cheap) if he buys the parts and agrees to keep a vigilant eye on my street-parked cars going forward. He enthusiastically agreed to both conditions with a huge smile and handshake to seal the deal.
Let’s Wrench: Idler Pulley
The first move here was to get that howlin’ idler pulley swapped out since it was at risk of seizing at any moment and taking the belt (and possibly other items) with it as collateral damage. This job couldn’t be any easier, as the engine bay afforded all the space in the world for accessibility, and the idler pulley and belt tensioner were both staring me right in the face.
A quick tension release to remove the serpentine belt from the idler pulley, then left-loose to remove the old pulley and right-tight on the anchor bolt on the replacement pulley was all it took. Pop the belt back on, and that’s it! This is the type of repair that is not hard whatsoever to actually accomplish, but far more difficult to correctly diagnose. Anyone can turn a wrench, but not everyone has the knowledge or experience to know why you’re turning that specific wrench in that specific way on that specific bolt.
Starting the engine to confirm the repair, I was greeted with the sweet, quiet hum that you’ve come to expect from these cars over the decades. Not hearing much of anything sounded great.
Let’s Wrench: Air Suspension Replacement
This next part was going to be a bit more difficult. The $60 worth of steel springs had arrived in the mail a few days earlier, and as any mech knows, just the sight of a coil spring can bring chills as working with springs and all of their inherent potential (and then kinetic) energy is dangerous.
After watching a few videos on this repair – some good, some not-so-good, “Hey guys…” the intro line of every one – I found that this job didn’t require spring compression (luckily), so the risks and difficultly level were greatly reduced.
I got the car up on jack stands (two per side to incorporate redundancy; you can never be too safe when underneath 4,000+ pounds of steel) and was pleasantly surprised with the ease of access and simplicity of design of the airbags! The electrical and pneumatic connectors were simple plugs and twist-offs, and elven hands weren’t required to reach and manipulate them.
Getting the bags out from their perch over the rear axle required a bit more Jenga skill, as there was limited clearance for removal. Both bags were toast anyway, so I wasn’t against cutting them up for removal if need be. Right as I was about to slice ‘em up, I found that letting the rear axle sag to full droop allowed just enough clearance to get each bag out intact. Score!
With both bags removed, I was now at the halfway point and could pivot to the installation of the steel springs. This was going to be the hardest part of this repair, as the steel springs were much taller than the rubber bags and would not fit (uncompressed) between the rear axle and the body.
This is the type of challenging spot that every wrencher gets to on occasion where:
- The YouTube videos gloss over this specific part of the job
- You have to figure out a solution on your own
- Ingenuity is needed
Inspiration from a cold garage in Utica NY, long ago
Many years ago, when I was a kid watching my Dad fix the frozen rear hatch latch on his ‘91 Volvo wagon in the garage during a brutally cold winter night in Utica, NY, he told me, “If you just stare at something long enough, you can probably figure it out.” I’ve carried that moment, that phrase and that modus operandi with me ever since, and it’s saved me many times. Thanks for the wisdom, Dad.
I grew up the son of a UPS truck driver who was constantly telling tales in the kitchen about his epic adventures out on the road from the long, cold 12-hour shifts servicing rural Central NY. Stories about the truck sliding down a steep hill sideways, taking up both lanes of a rural road, in the dark, in negative temperatures, on black ice, and in white-out blizzards lofted him to hero status for his three sons, easily.
Just knowing that he was doing all that to keep a roof over our heads for all those years means so much with added age, time, and perspective.
Back to the Lincoln. After staring at this blue whale of a car on stilts in my driveway for long enough, I determined that there was enough access to install the springs (without compressing them) if I removed the wheels and rear shocks.
The shock removal was simple; after removing just two easy-to-reach bolts, I had each side out in only a couple of minutes – thank goodness for Southern rust-free cars.
Man, those clean, glossy black springs looked amazing sitting over the rear axle! I had, in effect, changed the rear suspension from “Lincoln-style” to a more rudimentary version that befitted the lesser Panthers (Crown Victoria, Grand Marquis, Marauder). It was great to see this after the wrenches stopped spinning:
I took the car off the jack stands and was super happy with the new, re-established ride height! You can see that it was sitting a bit tall in this shot (taken immediately once the jacks were removed), but the suspension will “settle in” after a few miles of driving.
All In An Afternoon’s Work
I drove the car around the block a few times to ensure everything was in its right place and then pulled the car into Billy’s driveway for delivery. He came out of the house grinning ear to ear at how good his car sounded with a new idler pulley and at how great it looked now that it wasn’t draggin’ ass! He handed over two hundos for my trouble and time and thanked me profusely.
Billy confessed to me that if he couldn’t get that car fixed for an affordable price, he was going to scrap it! The car only had 108,000 miles on it, which would’ve been such a huge waste of raw materials, carbon expenditure, and labor for such a glorious, stately machine to be destroyed well before its time. As we all know, those cars routinely reach 300,000+ miles in fleet duty. The steel would be recycled, but the glass, e-waste, seat foam, rubbers, glues, carpeting, plastic interior panels etc. mostly end up in the ground, where they stay for centuries. We have limited resources on this planet, and anything we can do to forestall those things from going into the landfill helps make the world a better place.
Helping others makes the world a better place, too. Fixing broken cars feels good and is something that is near-religious to each of us, as Autopians. Doing something for the planet and for the environment feels good. Getting to know my nice-guy neighbor and earning a little bit of cash to invest in saving the 13 halfway-broken cars that I have here at my Evil Wrenching Lair (underneath the only volcano in Wilmington, NC) feels great.
Using a skill set that you’ve honed over decades to make your neighbors’ world, this neighborhood, and this world just a little bit better, one Lincoln at a time, makes me confident that choosing this path, many years ago, was the right choice.
If there’s any part of your world or of someone else’s world that you think you can make just a little bit better, go for it.
Just stare at it for long enough; you’ll figure it out.
All photos by Stephen Walter Gossin
Top graphic images: GearWrench via Amazon; Stephen Walter Gossin
More SWG content below:
- I Took On A Bad GM Design In A Hail-Mary Attempt To Fix My Friends Broken Suburban But It Was Too Little Too Late
- Sparking Joy And Plugs: How To Repurpose A 31-Year-Old Junk Buick
- What I Learned Restoring A $600 Dodge Ram With A Burned Up Transmission And Ruined Interior
- How I Bought A Broken Version Of My Dream Car For $300, Then Nursed It Back To Glory And Let It Free
- Proof That A $700 Car Saved From The Junkyard Can Make Someone As Happy As A New Lambo Can
- How I Saved My Buddys’ SUV After It Died At The Most Embarrassing Possible Time
- Rescuing A 75-Year-Old Car From An Older Car Enthusiast Reminded Me How Important Every Minute We Get Doing This Truly Is
- How I Rescued A Long-Neglected Citroen 2CV Covered With Bullet Holes
- Kumho Flew Me To The Mojave To See If Their New ‘R/T’ Tires Are As Good As They Claim
- How Learning Saxophone in 1990 Led Me To Rescue A Dead Xterra From A Bouncer’s Driveway
Good read!
Why thank you, Good Doctor.
Hope that wasn’t just the whiskey a-talkin’!
To our benevolent overlords, we don’t get nearly enough SWG articles around here!
How was the rest of the air spring system handled? I imagine the compressor shouldn’t try to pump up bags that aren’t there, etc.
Plus, how were the shocks, and the serpentine belt?
Both were fine.
Billy did not want to spend one additional cent on this car that he didn’t have to, so we did the bare minimum and he went back to work in it the next morning.
There’s a level-switch on the rear control arms that kicks on the compressor when the rear suspension sags from a load.
Since the springs keep the rear of the car at maximum height, the compressor won’t turn on unless there is enough weight in the trunk to sag the suspension and trigger the level-switch.
Pull the compressor fuse and never have to worry about it.
Good on you SWG, nothing better than helping someone in need, and it’s always a pleasure to learn from your exploits. And picking up new phrases for use: “I’m YouTube Certified, yo!” Outstanding, thanks for the keeper!
Glad you dig it, CUlater!
You reading, commenting and supporting the site by being a member means a lot. Thank you.
You’re a good man, SWG.
Right back at you, Harv!
Thanks for consistently being here for us Contributors/ writers and for supporting the site by being a member.
Y’all are the best auto publication I’ve ever read.
Another great save! Well done, sir.
Savin’ cars feels good!
Thanks for reading and for the comment, my dude!
My Town Car had the opposite fail. The airbags were good but the leveling system fritzed, so it pumped itself up and I rode around for a few weeks with the butt up in the air. I think I remember having to pull a fuse to disable the air ride system after swapping to coils. Should NOT have sold that car.
https://itisgood.org/auto-biography/#94Lincoln
Another great read for a good deed, SWG! Bravo!
Thanks for reading and for the kind words, mate! You really should visit the US sometime soon – I’m speaking for 340 million people when I say that we’d love to have the Australian arm of The Autopian Writers Corps here in the good ‘ol US of A.
Plus, having someone with your wrenching skills within our borders is a huge net positive for this country. Plus you’ve also got great taste in music.
Cheers, my friend!
The Austropian :tm:
Mech here. Can confirm.
(and as ever adore SWG, I’ll ping in discord next time I’m headed down old wilmington way)
Please do! It’s always great to meet fellow Autopians.
Thanks for the kind words (as usual!) and for reading, my friend.
I don’t mean to impugn your wrenching skills, but…I’m a little surprised that you didn’t recommend a new serpentine belt as part of the job. At 108k miles, it’s an absolute no-brainer unless you know it was recently replaced. Modern poly-v belt materials will usually wear out before they crack. Info from Gates here:
Tech Tip on Belt Inspection Changes -TT002-15
Tbh I thought about that and wasn’t sure if a new belt was implied and so let it alone. But yeah, for $8-$15? I put a new one in a neighbor’s car as a kindness… to myself so I wouldn’t have to hear it chatter when she started the car.
It was the type of scenario where it needed to be fixed as quickly and as cheaply as possible, so I got it to the best condition I could in the limited time I had.
I’m with you though, 100%, if the scenario was a little different. Some folks just reeeeaallly don’t want to spend 1 more dollar than they have to on their car, period.
Us Autopian’s are just built differently!
For sure. I’ve gone in the last two year from “throwing 30 minutes and $15 at my neighbor helps my quality of life” to “$15 is a couple days of groceries for me and the daughter, working 52+ hours with no 30 minutes to spare.” I get it, and you’d go benevolently broke trying to keep up.
I’m 100% with you, but the part of the story where I said that money was tight for Billy was the primary element here.
Remember, he was ready to crush the car for $300 if he couldn’t get it fixed on the cheap. Every dollar counted and the belt looked serviceable when I was in there.
No impugning taken, my dude! Thanks for reading and for joining us here win the comments.
You’re doing God’s work! I’m fortunate to be doing well enough financially that I can replace parts “while I’m in there” without worrying much about the cost. I haven’t lived close to the bone in many years.
Mech here. Can confirm.
Appreciated the process of troubleshooting. Check.
I learned something new. Check.
Got a heartwarming story of helping a neighbour in a jam. Check.
It checks all the boxes for me, honestly. This is the writing I am here for, especially with the rest of the world being what it is.
Rock on, SWG
Thank you very much for the kind sentiments and for reading, my friend.
The supportive words really do mean so much to an amateur writer and wrencher such as me.
We’re lucky to have righteous members like you at this site.
SWG, won’t you be my neighbor? Who doesn’t love an easy-peasy rescue adventure? Kudos to you, Sir.
I have to constantly remind myself to take pictures and videos while doing these repairs, as they help to anchor and frame the story when it’s Writing Time.
The easy ones can sometimes not be enough for a story to be published/approved, so as opposite as it sounds, the more difficult the repair, the better the story.
Kudos to you as well, Dodsworth! Thank you for being a positive, wise, valuable commenter and member of this great space that we’ve all created.
I had to smile seeing the springs nestled in place and the car showing off its rakish new pose. You’re right about the pictures.
I worked for what eventually became Verizon for 26 years, starting at NY Telephone. It was a fun ride and I’m happy to report I retired 11.5 years ago at 59.5.
There’s truth on the horizon.
Thanks for reading and I hope retirement is treating you well, sir!
Thank you for writing! Retirement is terrific.
Just did this repair on a friend of mine’s car a few weeks ago. These are really good cars worth fixing.
I completely agree and I’m not really that into Fords or sedans.
I believe that in 10 years, cars like this will be covered for their low-tech solutions; especially when compared to today’s rolling computers masquerading as cars.
If Billy had driven a big ol’ Pontiac GTO, would it be correct to refer to you as one of the men who stares at goats?
Is that what Tom Brady fans are also called?
I think mostly just the females.
His neighbor would be a “Billy” that stares at goats 😉
All-around great article. You helped a neighbor, saved a beautiful old car, and showed us all how to fix a Town Car. Hoping to get a Town Car or Grand Marquis. I know that they scream “old guy”, but I’d like a V8 American luxury car while they are still available! And Northstar Cadillacs, while otherwise great cars, make me nervous. Thanks
I had a town car as a rental once in Madison, WI while working at the UW medical center. I was leaving the jobsite and had the windows down while cranking WJJO playing Mudvayne and I guess I must have surprised come college student. He did a double take when he saw the Town car – then he gave me a thumbs-up. 🙂
I remember when that Mudvayne video hit MTV back when I was in college. Carson Daily and the like didn’t really know how to react to it.
Those guys were intense!
“Dig!”
Thanks for the kind sentiment and for reading, Bob!
I agree, those cars do have such great lines and a stately presence.
You’re correct that they aren’t going to be here forever.
Good guy SWG to the rescue again. I don’t usually fix things for people, but I am usually more than willing to help troubleshoot and lend out tools. I find that by offering to be there, people are willing to try something they find otherwise too intimidating. I think it is similar to looking at something until you figure it out, except when people are alone they might feel overwhelmed before they actually consider their options.
Well said, Porch-ah. I agree that sometimes all is takes is being present to help inexperienced wrenchers overcome their fears/hold-ups.
Good guy Porch-ah as well! Thanks for reading and for the kind words, my fellow Autopian.
Does the stock airbag system allow for (driver or automatic) suspension adjustment (assuming based on load) or are the bags simply part of the system b/c extra cushy and luxurious?
Beautiful color…that or metallic maroon are the best colors for these if you’re not a fleet, and a great story about what economists call pareto improvement – you made everyone involved better off without making anyone worse off. We need as much of that as we can get!
When they work, they are load-leveling. And cushy!
Thank you for your years of supportive, thoughtful, insightful comments and for always being here in the comments section on every piece that I’ve written, Jack.
I speak for everyone here when I say we’re lucky to have you around as a member.
Unfortunately he also just ruined the ride on that Lincoln. No one ever wants to spend the money to fix it, and think it’s cheaper to put in coils. But it’ll never ride like a Lincoln should again. When the suspension in my Navigator started sagging, I quickly found the leaky connector and fixed it, rather than allowing it to go on so long that the compressor wears out.
I’ve gone through two compressors on my Navigator in the 15 years of it’s existence. First one was a warranty job, 2nd one I did myself. Not a big deal at all. The bags are still in good shape, no leaks in the system.
With these systems, what they don’t tell you is that you are supposed to replace the drier. It’s full of an absorbent material that has a finite life. Once it’s used up, moisture enters the pump and lines causing corrosion from the inside. The drier itself is pretty cheap, but nobody knows to replace them as they’re not on a maintenance schedule anywhere. I bought my Navigator from the dealer and it was never touched on any of the maintenance visits. I guess they just want you to buy a whole new pump.
Also, are there no dampers on this Towncar now? I’m betting that is one bouncy ride! Just humpin on down the road after every dip.
The rear shocks are still there, a-dampin’ away!
We all needed a good story like this today – thank you
Thank you for the kind words and good vibes, my friend!
We’re lucky to have members like you here.
Great to see another article from SWG! Thanks for helping your neighbor. Do all the good you can, for as many people as you can, for as long as you can!
This person gets it^
Thank you for reading and for the kindness, my friend!
… to quote John Wesley. Thumbs up from the Methodists!
These stories are my favorite – great wrenching content, a childhood story that provides context to your values and voice as a writer, great advice (works in research too), and a human connection to the vehicle. Thanks for great content as always SWG!
I am humbled to receive such kind and glowing words of warmth and support.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart/ toolbox. Seriously though, it means the world to me.
Great handle/name also! Commander Cody would approve!
I had a neighbor who lived across the street from me that helped me as I went from “Leaving an oil slick in the driveway because I didn’t know to check for to make sure the old oil filter gasket came off the block” to “Built my first Gen 1 SBC with aftermarket parts”. I’m eternally grateful to him for mentoring me (and even lending a hand every now and then).
This article made me think of him, and I hope I get the chance to pass it along one day.
Adding aftermarket parts makes it way harder! That’s quite impressive.
I love the vibes above; thank you for reading and for the nice comment, Ishkabibbel.
Have you had a follow-up with your neighbor on if the ride is noticeably different than he remembers before the air springs went out?
Billy did stop by and tell me (with a big smile) that his Big Beautiful Blue Boat was “ridin’ smooth!” a few weeks after the repair was completed, so I took that to mean that the springs were comparable to the bags from his perspective/opinion.
“Best part about this car: no payment!” -Billy Badass
Thanks for reading and for the comment, my dude!
That’s fantastic. I wonder how much of a difference it really makes (from someone who is definitely not fancy I can’t imagine it’s that big of a deal).
No car payment is the best thing about old(er) cars.
I did this on my mid 2000s Escalade, replacing the airbags with coil springs from a suburban, and quite honestly I didn’t feel much of a difference. It too was also pretty easy like SWGs project there.
SWG content is always a pleasure to read.
Thank you for always being so kind and supportive, Mike! Hoping to see that CTS-V one day in person. Those cars are monsters!
mke is for Milwaukee (the airport code) but that’s OK! Keep up the great stories SWG!
I believe the main selling feature of rear air suspension was that when you fill that huge rear trunck with luggage the headlights don’t point at the sky. Auto leveling for the win.
“The $60 worth of steel springs”
Amazon sells the air bags for about the same price. Had it been me I’d have been tempted to keep it fancy.
I wondered the same thing. Though my empirical skepticism of the ole Haynes Manual approach made me wonder if it’s easy to remove the old dead ones but damn hard to install the new ones.
I can’t imagine its any harder than the springs. At least you can squeeze the air out to shove them to a tight fit. You’d need coil compressors to do the same with springs.
Definitely easier than putting steel in.
Super easy to install, about a 15 min job per side once the vehicle is on jack stands, it is even easier to install than the steel springs since you don’t have to disconnect the shocks to let the axle droop further. With the solenoid out of the bag you can compress it, flex it this way and that as needed.
The only possible gotcha is if you just drop the car down on un-inflated bags they can get pinched and possibly tear. Not that it is a big deal to fake the car to at least partially inflate the bags before you set it down.