Welcome back! This week’s finds all come from the Underappreciated Survivors group on Facebook. I haven’t gone through there in a while, and I found some fun stuff for us to check out, starting with these two late-K-era Mopars.
I admit it: on Thursday before the holiday break, I was messing with you, putting that Pontiac Phoenix up against a classic Mercedes. It was just too funny of a juxtaposition to pass up. Of course the Mercedes won, by a country mile, even with the price difference. You’d have to be nuts to prefer a malaise-era GM box to a finely-tuned German machine from back when they really knew how to build ’em.
But I will say this: if you leave the Benz out of the equation, the Phoenix is nowhere near as bad of a car as some of you make it out to be. It’s old enough to be exempt from emissions nearly everywhere, so you can make it run properly without having to worry about testing – and plenty of parts exist to wake up those old 2.8s. It’s a manual, which makes it orders of magnitude more interesting than the same car with an automatic. And it has that dogged never-say-die toughness that 80s GM products are known for. If you want a cheap car that’s more fun to own than Oh Look Another Camry, you could do a lot worse.
Even a Chrysler fanboy like me has to admit that the earliest iterations of the K-car platform were pretty much crap. They were light-years ahead of the old Aspen and Volare, but that’s a very low standard. A company running on fumes, asking for a loan from the government and using those funds to completely reinvent itself, is laudable, but that doesn’t mean the cars were all that hot. By the early 90s, however, all those early bugs were worked out, and by the end of the run, the K derivatives were actually really good cars – if you chose your options wisely. Let’s see how these two compare.
1992 Plymouth Acclaim – $2,200
Engine/drivetrain: 2.5-liter OHC inline 4, three-speed automatic, FWD
Location: Asheville, NC
Odometer reading: 120,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
Sometimes, you can tell a car’s demographic just by looking at it. A minivan isn’t likely to attract young single men as buyers, nor is a small, rough-riding sports car going to appeal to single moms. But a Plymouth Acclaim? That’s Grandma’s car, no doubt about it. It’s comfortable, but not luxurious or extravagant. It’s sturdy, economical, and has a perfect shelf on the back window to hold a tissue box. And it’s domestic, so the neighborhood mechanic won’t be scared off by it.
The AA-body Acclaim, and its sister model the Dodge Spirit, replaced the original K-body Reliant and Aries in 1989. The changes were evolutionary, though; this is still pretty much a K-car underneath. It’s powered by an updated 2.5-liter version of the old K-car four, and the same old three-speed Torqueflite automatic. Hey, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. This one has 120,000 miles on it, and the seller says it’s in great condition.
The AA body came in a few cool variants, like the fiery Dodge Spirit R/T and the cushy Chrysler LeBaron sedan, but the Plymouth Acclaim pretty much only came in one flavor: Plain. Yeah, there was an LE model, but it just had some more stuff on it. Most Acclaims looked just like this one on the inside – a split bench seat, a column-mounted gearshift, and not a whole lot else. It does have air conditioning, and the seller says it works fine.
Outside, it’s missing some clearcoat on the horizontal surfaces, but that’s to be expected. It’s rust-free, and doesn’t have any damage, not even any garage door scrapes. I always liked this shade of blue, too. It’s never going to be an interesting car on its own merits, but the fact that there aren’t many of them left makes it a conversation piece. Show up to a car meet with this thing, and you’re guaranteed at least an “oh, wow.”
1993 Dodge Grand Caravan LE – $1,700
Engine/drivetrain: 3.3-liter OHV V6, four-speed automatic, FWD
Location: Yadkinville, NC
Odometer reading: 234,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
The K car wasn’t the only savior for Chrysler in the 80s, of course. A whole new type of vehicle, the car-based minivan, took the market by storm in 1984, and it took a long time for other manufacturers to keep up. Chrysler didn’t rest on its laurels while the rest of the industry played catch-up; it made constant improvements throughout the first generation. This second generation is mostly an evolution, with the sharp corners rounded off for aerodynamics.
Drivetrain options carried over for the second generation, except no turbocharged option was available. Two V6s were offered, though: a 3.0 liter from Mitsubishi, and Chrysler’s own 3.3 liter, which is what this van has. It drives the front wheels through Chrysler’s four-speed Ultradrive transmission, which had a rocky start, but was much improved by 1993. Most of the troubles were caused by mechanics using the wrong fluid to top it up. This one was owned by a mechanic and has nearly a quarter-million miles on it, so it seems like it got the good stuff.
The second generation Caravan got a new interior, too. Features like “stow-n-go” seats and rear-mounted video players were still years away, but at least this generation ditched the fake woodgrain on the dash. This is the long-wheelbase Grand Caravan, with seating for seven, though the rear two rows of seats barely look used. The front seats are pretty worn, as are the door panels, but nothing looks damaged or torn up.
It’s showing its age and mileage outside. The paint is coming off the bumpers, and flaking off the window trim as well. And it looks like the tailgate was replaced – see the red rectangles around the badges? Someone painted a used tailgate to match and just masked around the badges. Quality workmanship, there. Hey, at least it isn’t rusty.
The most serious charge you can really level against either of these is that they’re boring. But when it comes to cheap cars, if you really just need something to get around, excitement is overrated. You can still get parts for these everywhere, they’re easy to work on, and you should be able to get a couple of years out of either one. And for the price, that’s about all you can ask for. So which one will it be?
Team Minivan all the way. “If you can’t be handsome, at least be useful” is basically my life philosophy.
(Yawn). Sorry, what were the choices?
Pam says “They’re the same picture…”
I voted Acclaim. My family got bit in the ass too many times borrowing my Grandma’s 1993 Town & Country back when it was less than 5 years old. Once we got our 1998 Astro LS, we never looked back. She did keep buying Town & Country vans and her 2003 model held up beautifully.
The Acclaim has a certain…well, I was going to use a French term, but that feels wrong here. So, I’ll say the Acclaim has a little somethin’ somethin’ about it. It looks clean, the interior is decent, and no one will pay any attention to it. It is a great example of background car #47 from any show filmed between 1992 and 2002. It screams “car” and there is nothing wrong with that level of honesty.
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
A long long time ago, in a life far far away I was a Military Police soldier in the US Army. Upon my arrival to Fort Gordon Georgia I found that our road fleet consisted of 8 or 9 Plymouth Acclaims. My sergeant immediately told me not to laugh as they had just replaced the prior fleet which consisted of Chevy Citation X11’s. Seriously. So for nostalgia reasons I will take the Acclaim.
We’ve already got three four-door sedans in the family fleet. If someone dumped the Caravan in our driveway it wouldn’t get driven much, but it’d get to haul stuff from time to time. And there are always those occasions where you get to say “hey, I’ve got a minivan! Let’s all pile in!”
I feel like this is a hostage situation or a gun to my head sort of choice, but I’ll go for the lower miles and attempt to grin and bear it
Yeah, I kinda grumbled to myself about the rules here at first. Then voted for the van cause it’s cheap enough to prompt more of the ‘yeah, I think it can make it up there kind of impromptu camping trips
Those are the EXCITING holidays that you will always remember! Maybe not for all the right reasons, but still.
Exactly! I haven’t created any great stories about horrible decisions in some time now
I would wager Chrysler paid less than $1 for each wheel cover on the Acclaim.
“ And it has that dogged never-say-die toughness that 80s GM products are known for.”
Most 1980s GM products were NOT known for that.
And my vote goes to the Dodge Caravan.
I adore Acclaims and Spirits. I don’t know why. I seriously shopped them as a used car in the late 90’s but couldn’t find “the right one.” A friend had an Acclaim, and a Voyager (5-spd!) and I borrowed it on a visit out in Seattle, drove to Mt. Ranier. It’s not fast but gets out of it’s own way and is a relaxing highway car like old American cars used to be before everyone wanted to be sporty. All the controls are where they should be, roomy, great visibility. This has the drivetrain you want for reliability and ease of service. I’ve always had a weird fantasy of scooping up interior parts (poofy brougham-tastic seats, etc.) from a junkyard Lebaron sedan (only had the Mitsu V-6, no thanks) and dressing up a base Acclaim or Spirit. If I had space to keep it I might buy this one. Some weekend paint correction and I bet it would clean up nicely.
I don’t hate them, but they, to me, fall under, ‘Eh, it’s a car, I guess’ : for 2 large I’d find something far crappier but more interesting. But, my actual point here is that I’m glad our community includes someone who actively appreciates them.
Shitbox appreciation diversity is a good thing
The only acclaim that Plymouth ever had was the nameplate on the trunk lid. The Dodge, on the other hand, was voted most likely to be stuffed with ANFO and parked outside a government building. Now that’s acclaim – or infamy – I get those two confused.
Ooof, that Acclaim brings back driver’s education PTSD. My high school had a small fleet of these and they were pretty tired and beat up by the time I was enrolled in the driving course.
I still remember my driving instructor asking me to avoid “jackrabbit starts” from a standstill, which is pretty hilarious to anyone who had a taste of the 2.5 four in that car.
. [had the Acclaim and Caravan confused, deleted comment]
Jackrabbit starts in an Acclaim??
I would offer more like grudging badger
but that’s just, like, my opinion, man
My great aunt had an Acclaim in hunter green with the “LE” trim. I don’t think it had much more than this blue one. It ran well for a long time.
I’m betting you could probably wring another 50-75K miles out of the Acclaim without too much maintenance beyond the usual. Plus it looks much more well cared for than that minivan.
Despite the high likely hood that 4 speed is toast either because someone put in Dexron 3 in it like most people did to call it junk or no one bothered to service it because who the hell ever listens to Chrysler maintenance intervals, I would rather have a van. Atleast I can remove the seats and have quite a large cargo area.
Acclaim solely because it’s located in my old home town and there’s a non-zero chance that I saw it being driven around at some point when I still lived there.
Neither choice gets much acclaim…and neither is very grand! That said low mileage Acclaim for me. I’ll wear a bag over my head while driving it. Wouldn’t want anybody to recognize me! Lol
My grandmother would never be seen in something as plebian as a lowly K-car based Acclaim!
She had a ’91 Dynasty with the 3.3L, which is clearly light years better.
Also it would spin the tires at even the slightest hint of rapid acceleration. Those whitewall Invictas never knew what was coming.
NC vs NY? Rust free NC all the way.
Ahem. The Acclaim in my family belonged not to my grandmother, but to my great-grandmother. And it had a turbo!
That said, the most boring car ever made, or the ugliest minivan ever made? I’ll take a pair of roller skates over either, and I don’t know how to roller skate and have terrible coordination and balance.
Spent a good deal of my youth in those second-gen Dodge Caravans. They’re peak minivan to me. So I’m going with the van, not that I find the Acclaim awful, but do I really want to drive that thing more than once?
I have a hard enough time waking up on Monday mornings without these two choices.
One of those vans was my first car. It was reliable and cheap to work on, but got too rusty to bother with eventually. I’d take one again.