Way back in 2017, I got an opportunity to take my then-six-year-old kid, Otto, on a fun event sponsored by Hagerty that let us drive all manner of vintage cars, including a nice long stint in a 1970 Fiat 500. It was a blast; we had a great time, and I think it was one of the formative moments in Otto’s appreciation of cars. The PR person who set up my participation in that event now works for Hemmings, another car-focused company that begins with the alphabet’s eighthmost letter, and they’re doing a road rally this weekend. This kind PR person offered Otto and me a chance to participate.
Of course, we said yes. It seems fun, and sure, there’s some nostalgia appeal about being able to do another father-son drive event now that his age has more than doubled. I don’t think mine did that, thankfully, but I’ve definitely aged.
The rally is called the Hemmings Motor Club Rally: Paso Robles, and sure, maybe Hemmings is a competitor in this autojournalism business, but aren’t we really all one big family, deep down? Full of resentments and irritating one another and getting into screaming fights every Purim? Sure we are.
I have a feeling that there will be some spectacular cars on this rally, which will take us from the Los Angeles area to Paso Robles (the Spanish words for “Father Hamburgler”), and alongside those spectacular cars, I’ll be driving our ridiculous one: our Nissan Murano CrossCab.
Is the CrossCab worthy of the honor of being in this rally? Ha ha ha, no, no it isn’t! Not at all! Will it be the objectively worst car entered in this rally? Very likely, unless something catches on fire, and even then, it’ll probably still be the worst.
But the gleefully strange and misguided CrossCab has already proven its mettle when it comes to mixing with its betters; remember this thing rubbed fenders with Bugattis and vintage Porsches and Lamborghinis and other exotic iron. I’m confident our merlot-colored weirdo will hold its own just fine.
I mean, I think. Will the notoriously finicky CVT decide to give up on this trip? Will the top decide to stop working in the perfect, near-vertical halfway position? Maybe? Anything is possible!
Hopefully Otto will have as much fun now that he’s a teenager as he did when he was just a little kook. He’s like three times longer now, though. I hope that won’t be a problem? Will he be a helpful co-driver and be good at reading the route book? I’m not really going to hold my breath, but we’ll see.
So, this is all to say I’m traveling most of today. I’ll hopefully have more for you soon, though!
Does Otto have any writing interest? Along with the article that Jason writes after the event, I would enjoy a alt-POV twin article from The Ottopian.
I went to a car show at a Porsche dealer in Palm Springs last weekend which had all of the typical cars you’d expect in Palm Springs, plus…. a Murano Crosscab! You guys are trendsetters.
This is awesome. Babies are cute, but it’s so amazing when your kids get old enough to DO STUFF with you.
My eldest is now 9 and yeah, the past year or so has been great in the being able to do stuff without whining or losing interest quickly ability. Hopefully my 6 year old hits that point soon.
Hey you kids have fun, that is the important thing.
No need to worry about automotive bonding, when you’re both laughing uncontrollably.
Have a blast! I love road rallies. My first one was with my Dad in his Miata when I was a teen. Now my wife and I do them. Great easy way to have fun with cars!
I’m putting on a road rally Saturday for my SCCA region. Halloween-themed with cemeteries, pumpkin patches, etc. Should be ~4hrs and I’m giving bonus points for costumes, and decorated cars. I need to decide which Star Wars costume to wear.
“ Paso Robles (the Spanish words for “Father Hamburgler”)”. Made me laugh more than it should have. Thanks for the humor this morning
That snort you heard was me.
Funniest/cleverest thing I’ll read all day, and it’s just a throw-away parenthetical. Never change, Torch.
robble robble robble
“Move ’em on, head ’em up
Head ’em up, move ’em on
Move ’em on, head ’em up
Rawhide!”
It just started playing in my head while reading this. Dammit is insanity contagious?
We got both kinds here. Country AND western.
Shall we start setting up a GoFundMe for your bail money before you get arrested for child abuse?
It comes with free tacos, burgers and pastaries according to their website. When I was a teenager I would definitely drive three days for that.
Somebody please reassure me that I’m not the only person who read “pastaries” as “parasites”. While maybe not the most inspired marketing prose, it seems like it wouldn’t be entirely outside of the realm of possibility (probability?) for this type of event.
I saw pastries, but it’s breakfast time and I’m hungry.
Are you me?
Same reaction lol
A different mindset may have led to “pasties”… It’s all in the eye of the beholder.
Yeah,well, I read this bit “Full of resentments and irritating one another” as “urinating on one another” and thought, yep, this is a Torch article.
is a pastarie a baked delicacy made out of noodles?
Lasagna, manicotti, baked ziti, etc. There are plenty of baked pasta delights waiting for you at your local pastary shop.
Good Luck, Torch!!
And youre killin the Dad thing. Ottos going to have a ton of (hopefully great) memories of father/kid roadtrips.