Naming A Supercar ‘Bruce’ Is A Bold Choice I’m Not Sure I Can Get Behind

Look, I’m all for naming a car after a principal or founder of the company. They probably deserve the recognition, especially if it’s on a special car that’s sort of a magnum opus of the brand. However, things get tricky when you’re talking about first names; there are some that will work, and some that don’t.

Recently, the Car Moses reported that McLaren has filed for a trademark for “Bruce McLaren.” This could merely be an effort to protect intellectual property, but some other websites are excited about the prospect of a car named after the great Formula 1 driver and car constructor who founded Bruce McLaren Motor Racing in 1963. That’s fine, but do we really think that a car named “Bruce” makes sense?

I think this is tricky territory. “Edsel,” for example, seemed like a doomed name from the start, no matter the fact that he was Henry Ford’s only son and helmed the company from 1919 to 1943. “Bruce” is a good name, but as a model name, it’s out of place. There’s an argument being made that if a “Ferrari Enzo” can exist, then a “McLaren Bruce” can as well. I’d argue that logic doesn’t work. Say “Enzo” to anyone who doesn’t know the Argentine soccer star (I didn’t), and they will immediately think of the rather prickly founder of the company that makes cars with prancing horses on them, assuming they know cars. Or, they’ll just think it’s a cool, Italian-sounding something. Mention “Bruce,” however, and the typical person is likely to think of anyone but the founder of McLaren Motor Racing.

No, you’ll think of the guy who made the album The Return of Bruno, saved most of the crew at Nakatomi Plaza (RIP Mr. Takagi and Ellis), and then spared the entire planet from an asteroid:

Or maybe “Bruce” will evoke the legendary Hong Kong martial artist and movie star:

Don’t sleep on the Bruce who cared for the Earth’s remaining forests in space. And then his daughter barely made it out of Jurassic Park alive.

Don’t get started on music. First of all, it must be noted that the name “Bruce” is never uttered in the song by ELO that played in the roller rink when you were trying to chase the girl you had a crush on as a 12-year-old. Apparently, he’s saying “grooos,” which makes no sense at all.

There’s also The Boss, of course, but I don’t really care to hear some depressing track off of Nebraska since I’d rather use this as an excuse to bring up the Bruce Springsteen/Rick Springfield confusion so we can hear Jessie’s Girl for the 550th time, wouldn’t you?

[Ed note: the first Bruce I think of when I hear the name is Jaws’ infamous mechanical shark – Pete]

To be honest, I’ve never really been a fan of McLarens. They don’t look bad, but they’re too sterile and remind me of those brandless, we-didn’t-pay-for-rights-to-a-real-car generic exotics you might see in a video game or a kid’s toy that looks like everything and nothing at all. I’m told there are different models, but I can’t tell one from another. They certainly offer absurdly high performance that you can use about ten percent of on public streets; probably better than most Ferraris, but given the money, I’d take the Italian car all day long.

I’m also not sure why they decided to change the one thing that I did find distinctive about McLaren: the logo. I know the new one is supposed to be a heritage thing that goes back to Bruce’s original garage, but it looks like a financial institution. Old on top, new below:

Regardless, I have the utmost respect for the legacy that Bruce McLaren created in his short life, and I’m happy to see the brand flourishing today. I just hope they don’t try to honor him by naming the brand’s next uber-ride “Bruce.” Please, don’t bring me down; let the idea Die Hard.

Top graphic images: 20th Century Fox; DepositPhotos.com; Universal; Columbia; McLaren