I have a different approach to looking at cars currently for sale based on the platform. With Craigslist, I usually default to “manual transmission” as that filters out most of the cars I’m not interested in. Facebook Marketplace is a mess, so I usually let it guess what I want to see and enjoy being amused by the response. With eBay Motors, I like to select the “modern classics” section, which brings in a lot of ’70s and ’80s cars, and today we’ve got two very different views of modern classics.
There’s this theory I have that Malaise Era cars are super cool again, which is somewhat related to the Radwood effect, but skews towards early ’70s and mid ’80s cars, whereas Radwood always feels more late ’80s – ’90s to me. If Radwood is Saved By The Bell, then Malaise is CHiPs, or maybe The Fall Guy.
Arguably, neither car from yesterday would have fit, as the Celebrity is too new and the XC70 is a decidedly Bush Era car. Even with the potential transmission issue, the Volvo captured most of the vote by a Texas mile.
That Volvo is uncomfortably close to my parents, and I’m slightly tempted to have them go check it out, so if anyone wants an E39 manual with high miles, let me know. My goal would be to get enough for it that I could get an older XC70 and set some money on fire inside of it.
But onwards to today. I probably couldn’t convince anyone in my family to buy either, but that doesn’t mean I don’t see the promise in both.
1985 Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham D’Elegance – $4,200 OBO
Engine/drivetrain: 4.1L V8, RWD, 4-speed automatic transmission
Location: Arlington Heights, IL
Odometer reading: 64,000 miles
Operational status: runs and drives “beautifully”
Oh boy, this is going to be fun. I love these mid-80s Cadillacs and Lincolns because they remind me of my wonderful, amazing grandfather. I was his only grandchild, so he understandably focused in his attention on me, but I get the sense that if I had a brother or sister, he’d somehow just double the amount of attention he could give.
The earliest car I remember of his was a mid-’80s Ford Crown Victoria LTD with a plush blue interior that matches what’s inside this Cadillac. I’m pretty sure my mom was driving the car because something had happened to one of our vehicles, but it was definitely grandpa’s car.
This specific model is interesting, and I’m sure Mark would be able to tell you more about it. The 4.1-liter V8 is, of course, the much-discussed HT-4100 V8. I’m not into ’80s GM products in general, and I had to squint to remember if this was the RWD model or the weird, transverse-V8 FWD version. It is, thankfully, the RWD one.
According to the seller, it’s been gone through mechanically, and so the biggest improvements are all going to be aesthetic. In addition to fading paint, it’s missing some body trim around the trunk. The headliner is sagging because even a low-mileage car is subjected to gravity. A little paint and body work, and this thing would be a slow but fashionable way to get around town.
1984 Dodge Colt – $4,950 (OBO)
Engine/drivetrain: 1.4L inline-four, FWD, twin-stick manual transmission
Location: Pasadena, CA
Odometer reading: 237,820 miles
Operational status: Was a daily driver in the early 2000s
What is the exact opposite of that Cadillac? Probably this Dodge, which has a little inline-four, a manual transmission, and puts its power down via its front paws. It’s also a captive import, as it’s actually a Mitsubishi underneath all of that. One of Chrysler’s many experiments in selling other cars under its various brands.
These things aren’t particularly powerful, although they are light. I am a little curious who might win in a drag race between the V8 Caddy and the little Dodge. It would be close and, also, extremely boring. There’s only one big question to ask when looking at a Colt, and it’s “Twin Stick?”
The answer, I think, is yes. That’s a good sign, even if the interior also needs work. As Mark explained in the past, the “Super Shift” transmission was a four-speed manual with a two-speed final drive, which is most notable for having two reverse speeds.
As you can tell, this one needs work. It was a daily driver before it was garaged, which was roughly around the time the Ted Danson vehicle Becker went off the air.
Which end of the Malaise Era spectrum appeals to you?
Top photo: eBay Motors
Without reading the whole article, I’m scrolling right down to the comments to say this:
If it has the weird dual-range gearbox, I’m all in on the Colt.
<reads>
Bingo.
<reads some more>
Holy shit how much? When it looks like someone has been farting barbed wire into the driver’s seat for the last three presidents?
versus…
The Caddy.
Yeah. I’ll walk.
that Colt seller has lost their G*d*mn mind. And I’m a fan of Colts and small cars in general.
the early to mid eighties Cadillac anything was pretty terrible stuff. Low miles on the 4100 is scary actually as they were not all that well known for the dissimilar metals in the motor to not react badly. really old acidic coolant certainly would not help here.
I want the colt simply to see if I can make it run again and to try out the Dodge version of the Nash 4+3 corvette trans in a little hatch. They used to make a turbo version of that colt, I think it still only made about 100HP, but It would still be a fun thing to try to revive.
Though, for the money, I would definitely rather go for a 944, I know an LS fits in there if nothing else. https://www.cars.com/vehicledetail/36da038c-46d2-4777-b11e-31ff0b71f047/?aff=atempest&utm_campaign=atempest&utm_source=autotempest&utm_medium=trp&utm_campaign_id=1&utm_trusted=TRUE
Fully prepared to congratulate you on picking two well preserved cars on complete opposite ends of the size and MSRP spectrum, and to say “my, what a difficult choice this might be”.
Then I saw the Colt’s mileage and interior. Gotta be kidding me. That seller is high as a kite. And Matt, maybe you are too :).
Caddy. It eats way too much, so I’ll just drive it a bit less. That Dodge is a disease.
They both need work, but the Dodge needs a good bit more (that nasty, decroded interior…yeesh). But then after you get “done” with all the work, you still have a Dodge Omni.
The Caddy, on the other hand, seems to mostly just need cosmetic work and is already both driveable and oozing style.
This is a no-brainer and should be a landslide.
To be fair, It’s not a Dodge Omni, which was a French-Simca-Chrysler car that was americanized, poorly, with an array of engines. My stepmother had a slew of them (and Jeep Wranglers) and they’re terrible. Dodge Colt is firmly a Mitsubishi and quite a lovely little japanese car along the lines of mid-seventies Civics.
But, I completely agree – as much as I love small cars and despise boats, the Caddy wins this one by a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNG Mile.
I was all ready to vote for the Colt based on the topshot, but WOAH that interior. Ghastly. I just can’t do it. Caddy for me.
No question, it’s the Cadillac. Yeah, the interior is full of the chintz-o crapp-o plastic, but just look at those seats! It would make a great road-tripper, as long as you don’t mind paying for the gas. The Colt looks like the kind of thing you buy when you’re 17 and your income consists solely of what you earn by delivering Door Dash.
it would be interesting to see one of the staff buy that and try to return it to it’s more formal home in New Jersey via los vegas. I would put money down(Membership for a year) on the 4.1 not making it.
A new adventure for Mercedes?
A Brougham with cloth seats? What kinda nonsense is that? My family had a Sedan de Ville back in the early 80s (diesel, no less) and it had the same seats, but leather.
For that kind of cash, you could get a decent ’94-’96 Fleetwood Brougham with the LT1. It had like double the horsepower and was nicer in every way. It was the last body on frame car from Cadillac, and the longest car available in North America at the time (North America is like America but with Canada and Mexico included).
Also it was the car that got Morty Seinfeld evicted, and it’s pretty close to an Impala SS under the skin.
CP for both of these.
Interestingly, a quick Craigslist search for my area shows a ’94 Fleetwood available. Looks like it’s in pretty good shape, only 92,800 miles and they only want $3500 for it. There is a significant mod involved, though.
https://chico.craigslist.org/ctd/d/orland-1994-cadillac-fleetwood-stock/7902635034.html
That’s pretty sweet, and I bet it has the towing package with gearing perfect for the drag strip.
It’s too bad it doesn’t have the chrome package.
I agree with you on the mods though. That chevron thing painted on the hood is a weird choice lol.
For those among the living, my choice would be the 1986-1992 Caddy Brougham. I prefer the styling to the whale bodies, but by then the HT4100 would be replaced with either the Olds 307 or Chevy 350.
I just don’t see the appeal in glacially slow malaise luxo barges, but they definitely have their niche. My choice for a big luxury car from that era would be an LS400, Cressida, 5 series, Legend or even a Q45. I still can’t believe people were buying these boats when there were so many cool ’80s luxury cars available.
the LT1 optispark system makes that option a no go for me. I would actually prefer the TBI 350 of a few years earlier in this case.
The optispark sucks, but it’s definitely not a deal breaker for me. Just replace it.
With What? I have seen a rather pricy kit to change it over to something supposedly more in line with modern LT architecture motors, but it still puts a bunch of electronics under the water pump and/or in the splash zone underneath.
Mine was starting to fail at about 20 years old. I’d have no problem putting the same stuff in. A 30 plus year old car is not going to be new Corolla reliable.
Of course the next step would be a standalone setup or LS swap.
Based on my experience with early TBI 302 powered Panthers, acceleration in that 4.1 Caddy must be positively glacial. And able to effortlessly waft across the continent at 75 or so once up to speed, stopping only for 87 octane every few hours.
Had one, really had to think about any slight inclines you would want to divert around. Fuel mileage I must say was not bad. Combined with a 27 gal. tank, you could cover some distance, slowly.
Wow, at that price from the topshot, I was expecting to see an absolute time capsule of an interior. That is… not what I’m seeing.
If the Caddy interior was red I might be looking at train schedules to Chicago right now. Even with the mouse gray/blue it’s a much nicer place to be than that colt, and in no way is the price reasonable on that poor thing.
Are we really going to just ignore those bathmat carpeted door panels on the Colt?
It was my second gasp on the interior, the first was the fading sheets draped over the failing seats.
Color keyed by the color blind as well. At least buy brown outdoor carpet!!
I’ll admit to using like color bath towels as temporary seat covers and disposable floor mats back in my steel mill maintenance engineer days.
Not even a competition! The Caddy has enough room for “activities” while the colt has fuck all. I would be hard pressed to trade a bus pass for that POS Colt
Get a few black suits, a few months of mortician school, and open a funeral home. The Caddie is perfect for the motor pool. Just quick repaint, some Turtle Wax, and add a few Kleenex boxes and you are good to go.
Totally! You can channel your inner Fisher (pick your flavor)!
That Caddy would make a wonderful summer cruiser. It’s not exactly a Malibu but it doesn’t have a stick shift and those safety belts have all got a a great place to go. When done with the ride, of course!
I want the Colt, but I want it to be cheaper and/or nicer, especially on the inside. Which one is quicker 0-60?
holy moly that Colt is priced about 3k too high, that interior is trashed!
The colt is more charming until you see the crackpipe price and the crackhouse interior. Yikes!
There’s a game on Price is Right where you remove a digit from a price to reveal the real price.
It feels like the Colt is playing that game. Is the real price $495, $950, $490, or $450?
If that’s the game, I would take the Colt 7 days out of 7.
Assuming we aren’t playing that game… I clicked Caddy.
All that Cadillac needs is a couple of chandeliers for headlights and it would be fit for a Duke
A-Number-1
Caddy all the way. That Colt looks to be a $150 car. Top Gear ‘merica episode material at best.
Good Lord that Cadillac has me written all over it.
Replace the hood ornament with a skull and it’s perfect for you.
Bad news! Matt has purchased the Colt and it’s heading your way.
At least it’s not a Rodius.
The Colt seems to have experienced some good times gone wrong, where the Rodius seems like what you end up with after the good times have gone wrong, if that makes any sense.
It certainly looks better on the outside at least.
Do it do it do it!
If I am going to go slow, I would rather be comfortable, so the Caddy wins today.
But they’re not *actually* comfortable
I have a strange fascination with early ’80s Cadillacs so I genuinely want the Fleetwood. Early ’80s Cadillacs were great. They were slow, inefficient, and garish, but they were absurdly comfortable and could fit 6 normal-sized adults semi comfortably. It is disappointing that no one makes isolation luxobarges like this anymore. I would probably buy this car if it weren’t 1000 miles away.
I have absolutely no idea why, but I also like the Colt for some reason. The price is insane, though.
Although I get what you’re saying, the Escalade still exists and fits the bill to a T and is arguably even more of a land yacht
I respectfully disagree. The Escalade is comfortable, but it rides relatively harsh. It is designed to tow heavy trailers and haul a lot of people/cargo, even if it is rarely used for such tasks. It may have a lot of luxury features, but it is at heart a utilitarian vehicle. I prefer old school land yachts that are completely useless at all tasks aside from comfort.
I like cars that can jump curbs, cross speed bumps at 20 mph above the posted limit, and run over moderately-sized animals (deer or equivalent) without the driver noticing. An ’80s Caddy can do that. An Escalade can’t.
Dad had a 1990 Lincoln Town car, it was a phenomenal road trip machine. Rear air suspension, HO 302 w/ dual exhaust, 3.08 rear gears and an AOD. Every early ’90s comfort imaginable yet still 3 cigar lighters.
The world’s nicest Colt can’t beat the world’s most meh Cadillac. I voted Caddy.
Username checks out.