Congratulations, you have won Powerball. Your total return on the one-dollar ticket after giving half back to your state is, oh, let’s say $50,000,000. Obviously, there are some purchases to be made. No more Malt-O-Meal Crisp Berry Crunch for you, it’s gen-yoo-wine Cap’N Crunch’s Crunch Berries from here on out. Twenty bucks to watch a still-in-theaters movie on Amazon Prime all by yourself? Screw it, you’ll still have $49,999,994 to burn through.
After the thrill of watching The Accountant 2 with a big bowl of Crunch Berries on your TV tray wears off, you’ll no doubt begin shopping for a larger home and a much larger garage. But what to park in there? Now that you can afford pretty much anything, the decision-making process has new facets to consider – which brings us to today’s Autopian Asks.
Even though fifty mil in the bank means I could fill an oil drum with c-notes and light it ablaze without feeling it, boy would I feel it. That’s money. And so, when it comes to cars, I’m not sure I could enjoy really romping on a car that’s a very-low-number collectible, or a unicorn such as a McLaren F1. I might like owning such a machine as an investment and occasionally driving it gingerly, but when it comes to a car I can take on an impromptu road trip that begins with a lurid slide out of the gated community I moved into five minutes ago, I would not be able to relax unless I was in something much more off-the-shelf.
Honestly, a Corvette Z06 would be more than enough car for me, overstuffed bank account or not. I doubt I could ever appreciate something that performs at an even higher level, and if I wad the thing, big whoop. It’s only $130,000 or so. It’s not a museum piece. No one will care. More importantly, I won’t care. I’ll just get another one.
I’d be a lot more upset if someone rear-ended my mint Dodge Omni GLH-S.
Your turn: What’s The Most Expensive Car That You Can See Yourself Actually Enjoying/Hooning?
For a “fuck it, I’ve got the money” car, I’d probably do a Ferrari California replica – still expensive as hell, but replica means I’d actually drive it without feeling like I’m taking the Mona Lisa out for a spin.
For a daily, I’m probably going topless Aston, probably a DB- special enough to be interesting, hoonable, but cheap enough the rest of my fortune has probably kicked off enough in interest to replace it by the time I learn exactly what that much power can do in the wrong hands.
Probably a Civic Type R. I’m a Honda guy, and a lover of cheap 90’s to early 00’s Japanese cars in general. I love hooning my B16 swapped 6th gen Civic hatch. I’d barely know what to do with a 10th or 11th gen Civic Type R, let alone anything more than that.
For hooning and fun, I think I’d go with a Porsche 911 GT3 with the Touring package.
It’s a RWD Porsche with a manual and a naturally aspirated engine. It’s not the fastest, but to me, it’s likely to be the most fun.
And I predict it will also be a future classic.
<looks at garage> … kind of have that covered.
Huh.
Ok, if I have won the lottery money, let’s go full stupid: Jaguar XJR-15
EDIT: Thinking about it now, GMA T.33 Spider might be up there as well. Probably slightly more realistic in the scheme of things, and more user-friendly.
I feel like my answer would scale with my available budget. There are some not entirely special cars that are a bit out of reach for me that if I could afford them I would use. I’m not a hooner by nature, but I have done some spirited driving in my ’05
Holden MonaroPontiac GTOThe goal here, I think, should be to buy a car that is utterly loathsome and despicable as a road car but is extremely capable on-track. It doesn’t need to pull double duty or anything, it can be a purely nonsense car. I’d wait and see what Porsche does with the GT2RS and just get whatever the most insane version of that is.
I’d take that cheap Ferrari from the other day. $50M won’t buy me the ability to handle a bazillion horsepower, but it’ll cover the cost of keeping that sweet flat-plane V8 singing.
Besides, my spouse would be laying claim to half of the money in order to SAVE ALL THE ANIMALS.
A Morgan Plus 4 w/six speed manual transmission.
A stunning work of vintage art with a modern drive train and suspension. Its realistically all the performance car I can handle. And a days drive down a coastal highway…. top down, wind in the hair, bark of the tires and engine, ocean smell filling the air… is the best hoon I can imagine!
Audi R8
Blackwing Is Always The Answer
Late 60s Lincoln Continental, with 1,400 horsepower. I’ve always wanted to expierence over 1k HP and also have a giant slab-sided barge to go get my morning coffee in. This would scratch both itches. I’d probably autocross/HPDE it every chance I got.
I’d get one of the Ferraris you don’t have to be invited to buy and almost daily it in an effort to see if I could “get it”. Whatever it is to “get” Ferrari.
When I tired of looking like an Appalachian Douche Canoe I would split my time between a 911 or ZR1 and something innocuous-looking but heavily fettled with. Sleepers rule.
I missed the and between ZR1 and innocuous on the first read through and was thoroughly confused haha. Now I want to see if we can turn flashy cars into sleepers. Like buying a type-R and swapping body panels with a base model.
Like, most cars. If I can get a smile I honestly haven’t seen from most car enthusiasts out of my Compass, I for damn sure can hoon/enjoy driving virtually anything.
I would probably buy a new Mustang GTD and run the wheels off of it dominating my local auto crosses and SCCA time trial events. I would also have to get a GT350 to run opposite the GTD. I would also have to get my current SVO restored as well as the tuned WRX that I have been daily driving so that I could change out any of them whenever I would want to scare the neighbors near the farm that I would buy just to have enough room to build the garage and test track that would be needed to test and tune all of these and any other fun car that would happen to catch my eye.
So I’m a huge rally fan and if I could fit I would hoon a Ford RS2000 as a daily.
Hmm if I can’t fit then a BMW E30 Restomod(think Singer inspired) I want something that is not so flashy that you have the cops on you as soon as you show up but people that enjoy cars will respect.
If you don’t have a lot of experience with the E30, it’s quite roomy. For a car the size of a corolla that is. The steering wheel might be the only thing you’d want to downsize for space if you didn’t fit.
I used to have a E30 coupe and fit fine. The back seat space is surprising. Just would want a more breathable seat material than the vinyl or leather seats.
I have a coupe with the hard-to-find cloth sport seats. They’re the absolute best.
I am inherently not a Hooner. With $50M, I’d try to find the dream car of my adolescence. A Mercedes-Benz 300 SEL 6.3 and have it perfectly restored to its Pony Car shaming glory.
And I would not hoon it. I would treat it with the respect and dignity it deserves. And I hope that I would enjoy it.
An expensive car I’d feel the need to hoon? A Pur Sang Bugatti Type 35 replica. Expensive as hell, but they still make ’em, so I wouldn’t feel guilty sending it around a track or rally.
I have always liked the idea of buying expensive cars and using them for their designed purpose.
Buy a new Mercedes G Class, fit it with proper tires, and use it off road the way it was designed. Not just dirt roads, I want to take it to Moab.
Buy the last Subaru WRX STI and use it for rallycross.
Buy a Porsche 911 GT3 RS and use it for track racing. Or even better, a Ford GT40 replica.
Buy a Bronco Raptor and race it in the desert.
There’s probably more I can’t think of right now.
If I had “f-you money” I’d most likely just buy actual racecars to go and race. I love hooning a hot FWD around a track, so I’d likely go get a TCA Civic Si to start off, then make the jump to TCR or GT4. I’d also for sure build a GLTC K swapped Miata, and an SCCA Spec MX5. Hooning a car on a road is great fun, but track days are the best. I’d also have multiple country club track memberships with cars parked at all of them.
My money is no object dream car is a 1967 Shelby GT500 (not Eleanor, but a real one) those are a cruiser, and not a track weapon. It would stay at my main house
Car? Nah. I’m pulling a Mercedes and learning to fly. 150 mph in the air is slow. 150 mph on the ground on public roads is jail bait. And learning to fly turbine powered RC airplanes.
This may well be the correct answer. And model turbines are craaazy.
but what are you driving to the local airstrip?
Whatever cheap beater can get me there. It’s going to sit getting sun-baked. No point in having a nice car when it’s going to prematurely age.
for $50M you wouldn’t have your own hangar to park in?
Nope. That’s crazy expensive. Except maybe at Podunk Field. Accessible down a dirt road where nobody’s caring what car I arrive in.
If someone hands me a Ferrari 365 GTC/4, or a 365 GT 2+2, or, fine, a Daytona or even a 365GT4 2+2/400/412 as long as it’s not an automatic, the first thing I am going to do is drive it across the country, quickly, regardless of how much it costs. That’s all I need, really.
A type 35 Bugatti would be entirely adequate.
Had a gt350. Let me tell you it’s too fast unless you can buy a play set too (track)
Imagine grabbing 4th on a backroad after passing a slow RV, and deciding mid corner to slow back down because the car isn’t concerned it’s deep in the triple digits in a corner….
This X1000. Even a car that is a lot slower than a GT350 is too fast to get anywhere near the limit (where things get interesting) on a public road.
That’s why I’ve given up any desire to own something that powerful…I just want a BR86 twin with power I can actually use on a normal basis.
Totally agree. At this point, car power has become largely a theoretical bragging rights game, not something usable in the everyday world, unless you’re on a track or someplace with zero other cars around.
It’s basically where motorcycle performance arrived maybe a decade and a half ago – you can barely access even half of the average supersport’s power in any normal situation.
That’s why I like driving slow cars fast. Like when I had my ’86 Toyota Van. Mid-engine, rear-drive, and a forward control set up wehre I sat on top of the front wheels. The meager 4 banger provided enough pep to scare passengers, but not enough to kill ’em. That said, I would love to hoon a late 90’s 911.
Bitchin’ car! Those Vans were so cool – this great combo of expected (cargo space) and not (pretty much everything else). I haven’t seen one in years, though just last weekend, I came across a Delica on the freeway. Made my whole afternoon.
My first thought is a few year old McLaren like a 540 or 570. With that much money you can drive it stupid and not care. About the same cost as c8 but gets written off easy if you are done with it.
Can’t say what I would do if I was rich, but went from a Miata to an M2 and I have turned into a total grandma behind the wheel. Not sure if it’s the cost so much as knowing what kind of damage I could do, but definitely slowed down. Still a great car to drive on the two-lanes though.