It’s Halloween this week, and the decorations around our neighborhood do not disappoint. There are half a dozen of those twelve-foot-tall skeletons around, including one in our yard. One neighbor opted for the giant Nosferatu instead, and modified it into a truly disturbing killer clown. And another neighbor stuck a convincing Jason Voorhees mannequin in the corner of their yard, so that you just catch it out of the corner of your eye as you drive by. In the spirit of the season, I’m decorating Shitbox Showdown for Halloween this week, starting with two classic black sedans.
Friday’s final was a foregone conclusion; there was no way that Lexus coupe was not going to win. And it won by a lot. I understand why; it’s a really nice car for a good price. But I have to be honest: it bores the hell out of me.
For me, no surprise, it has to be the distant second place: that scruffy little Plymouth Duster. You can’t call it a nice car, but it is entertaining, and there’s no reason it shouldn’t be reliable. It’s also half the price of the Lexus, and I’m kind of a cheapskate.
You all know by now that I prefer brightly-colored cars, but if I can’t have some vibrant hue, I prefer black to white or silver. Most cars look good in black, if a bit boring, but certain cars can really pull it off. Big, imposing sedans in particular look great in black. For your consideration today, I’ve got two fifty-year-old luxury liners that wear their black paint well. Here they are.
1975 Cadillac Fleetwood Sixty Special Limo – $4,500
Engine/drivetrain: 500 cubic inch OHV V8, three-speed automatic, RWD
Location: Long Beach, CA
Odometer reading: 83,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
It’s hard to imagine, if you only go back as far as the 1980s, that Cadillac’s slogan used to be “The Standard Of The World,” and it wasn’t just marketing hype. There was a reason that calling something “the Cadillac of” its type was high praise. Its technology, quality, and luxury were just about the best you could get, all the way up through the 1960s. The malaise era wasn’t kind to any carmakers, and it marked the beginning of an especially ugly time for Cadillac. But that was all later; in 1975, the Cadillac name still meant something, and if you saw this car go by, you’d have been duly impressed.
Power for this big, heavy car comes from the largest version of Cadillac’s V8 engine of all time: a nice round 500 cubic inches, or 8.2 liters, if you prefer. The transmission was GM’s simple, excellent TH400 automatic; Cadillac was smart enough to know when pulling from the GM parts bin was the wise move. The seller points out that this car is exactly old enough to avoid smog testing in California, which avoids a lot of hassle. It runs well, and is currently registered, but we don’t get much more information than that.
Because it’s a limousine, the original owner of this car probably didn’t spend much time behind the wheel of it. But whoever did the driving for them didn’t exactly suffer; it’s just as cushy in the front as it is in the back. GM’s build quality, including Cadillac’s, was on a not-so-graceful decline in the ’70s, and it shows in how well this car has held up inside. Most of it looks all right, but the passenger’s side door panel is in rough shape, as is the carpet.
Outside, it has faded a bit from its glory days, but you could bring it back. The paint on the horizontal surfaces is sun-scorched, and at least one of the taillight filler panels is broken. I wouldn’t be surprised if the other side looks the same. Reproductions are available for some Cadillac models; hopefully this is one of them. If not, you could always fire up a 3D printer, I suppose.
1975 Mercedes-Benz 450SEL – $6,000
Engine/drivetrain: 4.5-liter OHC V8, three-speed automatic, RWD
Location: Henderson, NV
Odometer reading: 107,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
As Cadillac’s star dimmed in the US luxury market, imports from Europe were on the rise, particularly Mercedes-Benz. The W116 series, introduced in 1972, were the first Mercedes sedans to officially receive the designation “S-class,” a name which has since become synonymous with excellent quality and state-of-the-art technology. This 450SEL is the long-wheelbase model, with the second-to-largest engine available in the range.
The US-model 450’s V8 engine didn’t make as much power as its European counterparts due to emissions regulations, only 190 horsepower, but it was still no slouch for the time. The only transmission available was a three-speed automatic, unusual since six-cylinder Mercedes models of the era had four-speed transmissions. The three-speed gearbox was beefed up to deal with the torque from the V8 engines. This one runs and drives well, and has only 107,000 miles on it, which is nothing for a Mercedes-Benz of this era.
“Built to a standard, not to a price” is how you often hear these cars described, and if you sit in one and play with stuff, you understand exactly what that means. Everything just feels solid: switches operate with a satisfying click, the seats are comfortable without being squishy, and it’s eerily quiet inside with the door shut. This one is in very good shape, from the looks of it, and the seller says everything works, including the air conditioning.
The mandatory bumper standards for the US market weren’t kind to the styling of any cars in the ’70s, but they seemed to hit European cars particularly hard. The gigantic rubber battering rams sticking out of both ends of this car aren’t as attractive as the svelte chrome bumpers of other markets, but honestly, I’ve seen how people drive in Las Vegas, and big-ass bumpers aren’t a terrible idea. This car is in great shape outside; the only flaw I see is a bar in the grille that looks like it’s coming loose. Should be easy enough to fix.
Most people would consider these two cars too old to be daily drivers, but I know people who would happily daily them, and either one would suit their styles perfectly. Either one would be a labor of love to keep on the road, but in both cases, you’re starting from a good place. If you were to play the “friendly stranger in the black sedan,” which one is more your style – the flashy American, or the stately German?
Nine to ten mpg and 190hp out of 500 cubic inches is just all kinds of Nope. The Merc wins by default.
While I love the velour interior of the Cadillac, my vote goes to the Mercedes since it seems to be in much better overall condition.
That Cadillac looks rough.
Man, I’d love to put steer horns on that Caddy and show everyone that I have my pictures, candy, and that I’m a lovable man who’ll take them to the nearest star. But the Benz is in such better shape and would be much more reliable if lacking that awesome large-Cadillac presence. Sadly, Benz it is.
Even a plain LWB W116 still turns heads.
Yeah, but with the Caddy, it’s a “this guy is livin’ large” thing. With the Benz, it’s more of a “here comes a diplomat” thing. (But that only works if the Caddy is in first-rate shape, and that would take a lot of blood, sweat, and tears.)
I just did a quick weight search for each of these cars. Is a standard 1975 Cadillac Fleetwood really 5,390 pounds??!!! The Merc is listed at 3,748. That’s a 1,600lb difference!
Slow and stately, indeed! I’ll take the Merc which has a fighting chance of getting out of its own way!
It sounds like a dark version of the jellybean counting game.
How many dead bodies can you fit into the back of the Caddy?
Absolutely no comparison here. The Mercedes, all day, every day over the ultimate float barge. I get nauseous just thinking about the nautical ride in those land yachts.
Had to go Merc, but Mr. Ace Frehley may have felt different:
In the back of my Cadillac
A wicked lady sittin’ by my side, sayin’, “Where are we?”
Stopped at Third and Forty-Three
Exit to the night, it’s gonna be ecstasy
This place was meant for me
The $1500 discount for the Cadillac is not nearly enough given its condition. The Benz, on the other hand, presents itself as a car worthy of continued investment. In this case, paying more is the better value.
One of these cars was from the era where the manufacturer was starting its slow slide into a period of extended mediocrity.
The other was a manufacturer at its near peak. It would not start sliding backwards for another 15 years or so. I think Mercedes still makes reproduction parts, IIRC.
I think I’ll try the peak version Mercedes. Had the Cadillac been a ’60s version, maybe, but this one is giving me ‘fat Elvis’ vibes.
The Cadillac would win if it was in WAY better shape. But it’s not.
Sitting in the back of that Cadillac the darkest fantasy I can think of would be to call in a hitman. In the Benz it’s to call in an air strike.
Unfortunately the Benz is no top of the range Maybach or even a 600 so clearly my fantasy alter evil can’t afford an airforce with fleets of modern jets. Perhaps my imaginary Republic of Crapanistan has only a single old Bf109s or Ju 87s at best, maybe a Po-2 at worst but still its an airstrike!
So its the Benz for me. Best stay on my imaginary good side y’all!
Said it before around these parts, but I live in the town that gave this Caddy it’s name – so there’s really no way I can take anything else.
I remember visiting the Cadillac engineering office on Clark Street in the early 70s. The reception desk person was dressed like an English butler. It really was a cut above.
There’s a town called Sixty Special?
Maybe he’s in Limousin, France.
Cadillac-sur-Garonne?
I’m sure you’d be driving one of the very very few Cadillacs in France.
I think the most profound thing about the 70s Benzes is how much they came to define modern cabins. If you look at the cabin of a 2025 car, it is very much inspired by one of these.
Anyway, I have experience and fond memories as a young child in a W116 as pictured and later a W123, so that gets my vote. Meanwhile, I absolutely hate most early-mid-70s GM cars like this one, with the colonnade treatment. Their styling got a lot better with the sheer look in the late-70s, starting with the 1976 Seville, and I like those cars. But I can’t abide by any 1975 Fleetwood.
Now I have “Joe Stalin’s Cadillac” stuck in my head.
Gimme the German tank. It looks to be in good shape and these things will go forever in style.
The Merc is for driving. The Cad is for being driven in. Merc all the way.
I grew up riding and wrenching in Benz’s of this era, so it is an easy vote for me for that 450SEL. The vacuum system can be annoying to troubleshoot, but the things are just solid and nice to drive without being overly massive like the Caddy.
If I were making a horror movie, or otherwise needed a truly sinister looking sedan, the Cadillac definitely has the more ominous presence versus the Benz. However, if I’m buying for myself, it’s the Benz all day long. If reasonably cared for, that SEL will easily outlast me at this point, and I expect to be around another 30-40 years.
I really wanted that Caddy, but after seeing the carpet, the trunk and the Benz, it wasn’t going to happen. Merc it is-all day long.
The Merc. Blofeld’s choice when chasing Bond.
One of Blofeld’s goons used a Hilux in Spectre.
Hollywood villains seem to appreciate Toyota reliability too.
If they were in similar condition I might’ve had a harder time choosing, but that Benz is great.
Benz for me. It’s in better condition, and it would fit in my garage, so I could keep it that way.
“He’s got a forcefield and a flexible plan
He’s got a date with fate in a black sedan
He plays fast-forward for as long as he can
But he won’t need a bed
He’s a digital man”
I’ll take my date with fate in the Merc.
I’m pretty sure that Cadillac limousine is a Fleetwood 75, not a Fleetwood 60 Special, but I’d need to double check the literature.
In any given Cadillac model year the 60 Special is usually my favorite, with a more stately look than the DeVille without the extra length of the Fleetwood 75.
In this era I’d have to go with the Sedan de Ville, it was a true 4-door hardtop (GM’s last) with opera windows for 6-window styling, a very airy look if one shared with all other divisions’ B/C bodies, and not necessarily only top-trim ones.
You could get an Impala with the same greenhouse although that would’ve been a bit spendier than a cops-and-cabbies spec post sedan, but all that’s academic in a 2025 context.
Easy one here, even for someone who likes old Cadillacs (this one is too new for me), but I really love the feel of old Benzes, it’s in good shape, and from the outside, it’s close to Mr. Eddy’s car from Lost Highway (would have to change to Euro lights).