We’re all still hearing about the looming threat of AI, and how important AI is, and how it’s taking over jobs and how we’re (I’m not buying it, but whatever) on the verge of an Artificial General Intelligence revolution and all of that related bullstench, but I think it’s also important to remember that, fundamentally, AI is an idiot. An idiot who is being used to do things like generate images of motorcycle wheel stands on Temu, and screwing that up with genuinely astounding energy.
We’ve covered this sort of thing before, and I always find it fun and perhaps maybe important, because it’s a good reminder that no matter how natural-sounding the answers some AI agent may give you, or how incredible an AI-generated image may look, fundamentally everything AI produces is derivative mush pulled from vast arrays of human creativity and work, and these non-self-aware machines have no idea what is real or not, what is right or wrong, or what is true.
AI systems have never been outside, never felt how water beads on skin, never driven a car, never eaten a hot dog, never laughed or cried or loved or lathered or licked anything. They literally have no idea what anything they output actually is, which is why we get spectacular amalgamations like the images in this Temu ad for a heavy duty motorcycle wheel chock:
We were sent this glorious madness by The Car Respecter on eX-Twitter, and it is really something remarkable. Let’s take a closer look at what’s going on there:
Wow. So, before we really dig into this, here’s a picture of the wheel chock in its actual context and scale:
See? It’s what it says: it’s a chock for one motorcycle wheel. It’s not big. But look back up at that picture there: the AI seems to think the wheel chock is some kind of massive lift-type thing taller than a man, and a motorcycle is a sort of three-wheeled, eight-foot-tall monstrosity with an upper wheel perpendicular to the other two, but in line with the seat, so I guess you’d ride sideways on that thing? Somehow?
Something like this?
I suppose no human at Temu actually looks at these things, which is likely the worst possible way to use AI, period. I could be appalled at Temu’s lack of quality, but even typing those words felt ridiculous.
Remember, what all of these current AI models do is gather and re-organize pieces of already-existing content from their datasets; they don’t actually create. They can produce convincing images, but there’s no awareness about what that image actually is; it’s just comparing images with other ones that have been identified to be a certain category of image. It’s impressive, sure, but it’s also not a replacement for a human. A powerful tool, sure, but things like this only happen when there’s no actual wet, biological brain in the mix.
AI is impressive at so many things, but, fundamentally, still an idiot that knows nothing about anything.
Is this the motorcycle emptiness those Brits been yapping on about?
Sadly, Salvador Dali soon lost his job with the advertising agency. He was a clock watcher.
It is Marcel Duchamp’s “Nude Repairing A Motorcycle”
The front end of the bike (up top) looks like an insect taking a selfie.
Clearly the assembly technician is an idiot. He’s using the blueprints as an apron!
I had a bike just like that in high school. If only I’d had that wheel chock, I might have kept it
In the future, AI will write the poetry, paint the paintings, design the buildings and write the music, and all the results will be shit unless human beings get in there and fix them. But we’ll still be folding the laundry and drying the dishes. Seems sub-optimal.
AI will also be reviewing what it produces and even writing papers on it; therefore, it will self-perpetuate it’s own folly. Like the tree falling in the woods analogy/question, is the AI produced material bad if all of the AI genersted reviews say it’s good? Am I live or am I Memorex?
I asked ChatGTP and this is what it said.
“Yes, bad AI-produced material is still bad, even if all the AI-generated reviews call it good. The “goodness” only becomes real if actual humans agree it resonates, works, or provides value.”
And if course I believe it because our computer overlords would never lie to us, despite the numerous times it has been wildly mistaken.
It’s not there yet. But it will get there. Just like we no longer have extra fingers or other easy tells on people, I can easily see this being corrected with more training.
And pray tell, what is “there”?
One word for you. Nightshade.
This probably isn’t even the AI model, it’s just an utterly shit prompt. Like I bet even “motorcycle chock” would be a better prompt, but I bet there’s probably translation errors in there too.
I was making the weirdest motorcycle noises in my head while reading this.
AI is a lot like my brother.
Wow, I couldn’t figure out what the heck anything was in the main image until you posted the actual product photo. I was not expecting the scale to be *that* far off from reality.
Remember, self driving cars and doing the same thing internally, you just don’t see an image of their warped understanding of the world they’re trying to navigate without killing anyone.
Perhaps they are trying to kill someone.
What is one step below “phoning it in”?
“Telegramming it in”? I feel like a telegram requires more effort than a phone call
“Robocalling it in” maybe?
“Telegramming it in” is perfect.
Or sometimes “Truth Socialing it in” for our specific guy. Same basic idea, though.
Wrong thread.
I like how it added more structure and filled in the gaps at the bottom of the product, itself.
The thing that blows my mind is that now that AI is churning out a truly astounding amount of slop onto the internet, it’s going to start referencing its own garbage and get even worse. It’s an ouroboros of absurd garbage that’s just going get fatter and fatter with straight basura.
I’ve been hearing about tech solving all our problems since the 70’s. And I’m still waiting.
And about self driving cars since the 50s. We are still waiting. And dont you dare call level 2 or three self driving. I’m with Torch on that
I just heard that flying cars are only two years away! Again!
And my favorite bar has free beer tomorrow, according to the sign!
I work on tech and am also waiting. Worked on a couple of early AI projects using state of the art early 80’s AI tech. The new stuff is just as dumb, just fails faster. A new shiny thing will come rolling down the road one of these days and the herd will hotly pursue it proclaiming it to be the greatest thing.
It’s called “model collapse” and is a known and real thing. It’s estimated that it takes three cycles of training AI on AI before the output is completely useless.
We may already be in Peak AI. I’m surprised it works as well as it does considering its trained on all the drivel of the internet.
Apparently the downslope may be starting already: chatgpt5 is officially worse than previous versions.
Apropos of nothing, each year I give a little more to Wikipedia.
Hey, anyone remember when everyone made fun of Wikipedia for being just a pop culture encyclopedia full of half truths? 🙂
At least Wikipedia usually has sources you can reference if you need to confirm anything you read there. In my experience, AI will claim to have sources, but if you actually look at them they’re often completely unrelated to what it’s telling you.
I happened upon a very long blog post today which was laying out the definition and factors and considerations for a particular acronym. The hero image at the top depicted a completely different and unrelated meaning of the same acronym… ????
When you are shopping like a billionaire, you must expect the unexpected.
“AI is an idiot”
The ironic safety net of AI. We’re worried it’ll get smarter than us but it’s too stupid to know it shouldn’t learn from us.
I’m more worried about AI getting smart enough to realize humanity is the problem and do something about it
Username checks out
Ah. The Phillip K Dick point of view. Of course they will, just like aliens they are not our friends
So true.
AI crap and Temu in the same article. Like shooting fish in a barrel.
And yet you still miss.
Insert “I understood that reference.” gif.
TEMU TRANSFORMERS!
Time to buy the item and then sue for false advertising when you don’t get that weird three-wheeled monstrous contraption.
Hahahaha! Suing the Chinese! Hahahahahahahahaha
You have more chances of seeing a BMW driver use its turn signals
They are registered in the USA… you can sue their American operations… based in Boston.
Audi driver nowadays
I think you have to first prove that your three wheeled, two story motorcycle doesn’t fit in the stand as pictured. Which I think may be an obstacle.
This might be my favorite one yet. It’s got so many things going on at once I can’t stop staring at it.
The real question is what ai model is the temu of ai models? All of them?
I think we’re seeing its work here.
DeepSeek
So that’s what the MC in MC Escher means, motorcycle, it all makes sense now.
Old & Busted: Sketchy Chinese companies refuse to hire native English speakers to review their instruction manuals and pamphlets.
New Hotness: Perfect English, now with total AI f*ckery.
Color: As pictures showed.
Judging by the caption in that image, even the AI-fucked English is still far from perfect.