I love it when a plan comes together. Or a car. Or, for that matter, even a sandwich. I guess I like when anything comes together. But, I’m particularly fond of when my Citroën 2CV comes together, and it looks like that finally is happening. As you may recall, this is the 2CV that our own Stephen Walter Gossin rescued from sitting in a field for a decade, forlorn and bullet-ridden. It seemed like it was well on its way to being reclaimed by Mère Nature, but Momma Nature can get her own damn 2CV. This one is mine.
My plan is to try and make it my daily driver, all 29 horsepower of it. To most people, 29 horsepower doesn’t seem like a lot of horsepower. But they’re forgetting one crucial thing: 29 horsepower is almost 30 horsepower. Now we’re talking!
But before that happens, I have a sort of driving goal/milestone in mind for the car, to give myself a sort of deadline. I’m judging the upcoming 24 Hours of Lemons race at Carolina Motorsports Park in Kershaw, South Carolina this coming weekend, and I want to drive the 2CV there. It’s a three-ish hour drive on mostly backroads, so I think it’s an ideal big maiden voyage for the 2CV.
In this final burst of preparation, there were a number of things I needed to get done: replace the voltage regulator, get the battery mounting right, get the headlight adjuster bar put together properly this time (I did it all wonky before), change the transmission oil, replace at least the driver’s side CV boot which is torn and barfing grease, and finally put the fenders and those triangular side-filler valance panels back on the car. It’s not a colossal amount of stuff, but it’s plenty for me.
Some of it was pretty painless; I ordered a new solid-state voltage regulator, which manages to keep those volts down to a reasonable 14.8V or so instead of the 18V(!) I was seeing with the dying old electromechanical one. Oh, and I had the battery mounting clamp upside-down before. Oops.
Okay, let’s get to the transmission oil change! I had no idea how long this thing had gone since having the transmission oil changed, and I’ve learned my lesson about that the hard way. I’m not going to make the same mistake here!
The tricky part about this is that the 2CV’s transmission requires – like many older cars – an oil that’s rated API GL-4, not GL-5, which is far more common. This is because GL-5 oils are very bad for “yellow metals” – you know, like brass transmission synchronizers and that sort of thing. I had the damndest time trying to get GL-4 oil locally, and while I could order it, there’s something about ordering oil that feels, I don’t know, wrong.
I finally found one that would work. It’s a single-weight oil, not a multi-grade oil, but that should be fine, I’d think, at least for now. Maybe I’ll change it to a multi-grade come winter, but for the moment, I’m on a deadline.
Draining the oil isn’t bad, and Citroën thoughtfully provides a little hole in the chassis/skidplate to access the drain:
I feel like I’m so used to more modern cars making everything a pain in the ass where you have to remove panels and plastic shields and crap, this little hole felt like such a thoughtful gesture. I even made a reel about it:
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The drain plug is magnetized, and had some metal shavings on it as would be expected, but it didn’t seem especially alarming:
Filling is a little less easy, though. For whatever reason, transmissions seem loath to provide a fill hole on the top, where you can just leverage your old pal gravity. My F-150 has a transmission filler hole that requires the use of a pump, and while the 2CV isn’t that bad, it is a vertical filler:
Couldn’t they have put it in the top? There must be a reason for this I’m just not getting. Anyway, it’s not that bad to fill, you just need to get a hose and funnel and stand like the Statue of Liberty to do it:
This was a very clear-looking oil, so I just watched the bubbles slowly glide down to know it was all being drank in. The transmission wants 0.9 liters of oil, and that funnel held 200ml, so I gave it five funnelfuls of delicious oil.
Next came the CV boot replacement, and I’ll fess up to something right away: I did it the lazy way. I know the right way would be to take the whole axle out and slide on the factory-correct CV boot, but I didn’t have the time for that. So I got one of those universal split CV boot kits.
And I know they’re only a temporary fix, and I should do it right eventually, and I know people roll their eyes at these things, but sometimes good enough is, you know, good enough. And it’s way better than what was there before!
You can’t really tell in this pic where I slid it up and away, but this boot had a big tear and was pooping so much grease onto that control arm below:
As you can see, that CV joint could use some more grease, too. So I cut off the old torn boot and packed in as much of that asphalt-mousse-looking grease as I could:
The way these boots work is that they’re split into two halves, and they lock together and are then glued. I did hit a snag when I found the Loctite glue provided with my kit was bone dry, and solidified as hard as a diamond:
Well, crap. Luckily, I bought two, so I used the glue from that one, and it actually turned out better, because I had inadvertently bought two different-sized boot kits, and, shockingly, the 2CV needed the larger one? Who would have thought?
Anyway, with a bit of wrestling and gluing fingers together and other excitement, I got the boot on, and it seems to look pretty good! I mean, this isn’t rocket science – it’s a rubber accordion designed to keep grease in and crap out. This seems fine.
I packed a bit of grease into the other boot, which was in better shape, and I’ll liberally apply hope to that one and replace it next time.
By the way, for those of us without garages, a truck tailgate makes an excellent ersatz workbench. I used it to hold my tools, my sparkling array of PB Blaster elixirs and unguents, and as a surface to trim rubber boots and cut up Diet Coke cans, which I’ll explain in a moment.
Putting the fenders and side valence panels back on was the next and most visually dramatic task, as I’ve been driving this thing around sans fenders for months. Without those fenders and fill panels, there really isn’t much body on the front of a 2CV, just a hood covering the engine like a gazebo; the sides are all exposed.
Getting the fenders on really helps define the 2CV’s face. While it looks like a strange Madmaxican hot rod without fenders, the 2CV’s chubby-cheeked look really needs the fenders:
Also, the fenders house the front indicators, which are very useful. Ethical, even. Happily, the wiring for those, with a bit of minor splicing/repairing, worked.
I’ve never actually seen the side valence panels actually on the car since I’ve had it, and I sort of realized why: a lot of the mounting hardware was missing. Luckily, these four little clips were there, and they would be the hardest to find, but none of the bolts or anything like that.
I did a hardware store run and got bolts that fit (and some missing fender nuts), but soon realized that the bolts I had were too small for the little clips. This is where the Diet Coke can comes in.
I’d actually used Diet Coke aluminum on one other part: I found that sometimes when I flooded the carb trying to start the car (that was before the choke was working properly; it hasn’t happened for a while now), it would drip some gasoline onto the exhaust manifold below, which I found alarming. So I made a little heat shield/drip tray to keep any errant gasoline droplets off the hot exhaust manifold:
You know, safety first!
Anyway, I realized that I needed to do something to make these bolts and clips work in glorious harmony, so I started cutting some can aluminum:
…and made some little folded-aluminum washer-like things for the clips:
Look at that! It’s like it just came from the factory! Except that should be a Perrier can or something, I suppose.
Say what you will, but it worked! And that’s enough for me.
Look at that! It’s so together! I’m positively delighted. I love this car, and I can’t wait to drive it more, lots more. I took my kid out on a little test drive around the block, but as I was driving, I heard a troubling-sounding rattling noise that was getting worse and worse. And I could feel something banging around! Crap! What’s happening?
Then I remembered I couldn’t find my socket wrench.
Somehow, I had dropped the wrench and it ended up in the chassis pan, by the muffler and one of the inboard disc brakes. The handle was peeking out below the car. Whew!
Anyway, I’m so excited. I think one night this week I’ll do some sort of extended test drive of like an hour, and then, fingers crossed, I’ll be making my first real journey in this thing come the weekend!
Wooooooo!
All photos: Jason Torchinsky
A three hour tour to the Lemons race? You should be fine. What could possibly go wrong on a three hour tour?
Well, we know the Skipper’s brave and sure, but is the mate a mighty sailin’ man?
His kid went all the way across the country in that taxi, so I think he definitely fills the bill if he can get him to go!
“Qui vivra verra”
Love the Statue of Liberty pose!
Same pose I have to do for filling engine or transmission oil on my motor home as the fill tubes are too far back and obstructed to pour a bottle. I tried a manual transfer pump that was supposed to work to pump oil but it couldn’t handle simple 5w30 or ATF.
“Give me new tires, you poor huddled mass yearning to breathe free, The wrench refuse of your chassis pan, Send these, cinnamon toast to me, I lift my funnel beside the golden door!”
(trim those hose clamp ends)
I expect the suspension member within mm’s of the outside of the boot has already done that. I’m actually shocked the turnbuckle cleared. The spacing there on my car is tight, although I think the rubber for my replacement boots is thicker
Yeah, clearance, and Not ideal to add a lopsided rotational mass.
There must be a better retainer, even those HD zip ties that need a tool to cinch up.
They do make stainless items equivalent to zip ties. I used one to hold a part of my vehicles appendage that was too much for plastic ones,
Yes, there is. The Citroen factory-used method: Ligarex. Accept no substitutes
Looks good Torch.
Experience has taught me to skip the bong hits before I begin a task.
Too easy for tools to be “forgotten” and lost going down the road during the test drive.
“and stand like the Statue of Liberty to do it:”
You know, you could probably light that oil on fire as you fill it so it’s like a Torch… Then, after you put on a Toga like this, you’ll REALLY look the Statue of Liberty.
Great article! Happy for you! I wish you many happy miles of motoring!
Please get some new tires before your road trip Jason.
If the 2005 movie “The World’s Fastest Indian” taught us anything, it is that black shoe polish will hide cracks in rubber tires, which allows one to pass tech inspection.
An awesome movie for both gearheads and non-gearheads, by the way.
I’m so familiar with the fill plug being on the side of the tranny being a royal pain. My TR6 has to be jacked up or on ramps, and then I can fit the gear oil bottle with the pump top in place, and use the tubing to slowly pump oil in. Then you have to lower or level the car, and see if it slowly weeps out the hole, as that’s the fill amount. Of course, if it doesn’t, then you have to repeat the whole process. It’s so fun. Luckily, it doesn’t need oil often now that I’ve replaced most of the seals.
The reason for the fill plug being on the side of the gearbox is for convenience and simplicity, believe it or not. The hole is situated so that the bottom of the hole is at the correct oil level. Fill until it starts to dribble out, and you’re good.
Trust me, it’s easier than the MGB solution with a dipstick and a fill tube, that must be checked and filled from inside the car…
One of many reasons I would rather push a Triumph than drive an MG. 🙂
By far, one of the brightest, best and most-rewarding events that has ever occurred in my entire history of dealing with/rescuing cars was finding the absolute-most-perfect owner for this car: Jason.
This is the kind of joy and passion that made most of us enter and approach this hobby in the first place. I’m so happy for you, my friend.
Also, excellent work! I love that you’re doing it your own way and truly making the ownership and final repair(s) experience your own.
That 2CV has had the most wholesome ownership circle. If we had to vote on one of the fleet to best represent The Autopian, I think it’s this car.
Its like they say: “Temporary measures make life more interesting.”
Hell, life is temporary.
There is nothing more permanent than a temporary solution.
Looking gooood! I’ll celebrate by wearing my new Autopian T-shirt that I just retrieved from the post office about an hour ago (no home delivery here). And what do you know? A 2CV right there on the front! Good luck with the trip to Kershaw, aka the COVID capital of South Carolina. Wish I could travel out there myself, but I’m busy that day.
Jason is the Statue of Lubricity.
How does one tell the Statue of Lubricity apart from the Statue of Liberty? Instead of holding a torch, he is one.
Next year’s t-shirt
Fun fact: a normal sized human would only have to hold that funnel at hip height.
Does this mean someone in your household DRANK a Diet Coke?! I’m calling CPS and APS and all the other PS.
In addition to having superior taste and refreshmentitude, Zero cans are stronger and better for ad hoc repairs. The metal needs to be thicker to contain all that flavor.
When’s he going to write the members only post: “I Had The Uncomfortable Realization That My Taste In Drinks Has More In Common With Trump’s Than Clarkson’s”?
“Elixirs and unguents” is the the most cromulent phrase I’ll read today.
Are you a Madmaxican, or a Madmaxican’t?
Ordering the right oil is expected. I’m going to order some gear and transmission oil for my older car soon. It’s been 6 years since all that was last serviced so it’s about time. And a tie rod end is going bad. I don’t want to be figuring out whether the clunk was from a tie rod end or a transmission.
This is so awesome…this seriously looks so good put together!
This is a tribute to one of the funniest COTD’s ever by Flyingstitch:
(I just added “kits” so it would fit for today)
“I need 2 CV boot (kits).”
“Sure, make and model?”
“Yes.”
—————
Also:
“started cutting some can aluminum”
So did you use a chainsaw? Ha ha
“Have you ever tried to sneak a wet, dripping ham onto an airplane by zip-tying it to a roller skate and then dragging it on a leash and claiming it’s your emotional support pig, assuming that because it’s made of the same stuff as a real pig, nobody would notice? And then the security guard starts asking too many questions so you grab the ham and make a run for it, but they tackle you and you smack your head, hard, into the unforgiving linoleum of the floor, and then while you’re sitting there sobbing, the guard tells you that there’s not even a rule against carrying a ham onto an airplane and you’ve wasted everyone’s time?”
I happened to be reading old articles, came across this, thought it was hilarious, and thought I’d share it again here/now w/ the link. Classic Torch material!
https://www.theautopian.com/you-gotta-amc-this-stuff-cold-start/
As the French say, “good job!”
It’s 4/20 and we have a driving 2CV. Can’t think of a better day to have a slow car.
Tire une taffe, mon ami.
Puff, puff, get passed.
Wooooooo indeed! Congrats.
While you might have not been able to find any in the type you required, diff fluid/gear oil in the baggies is the shit for vertical fill holes.
Also, I use an old ironing board as a portable work bench. It’s height-adjustable, has holes for screwdrivers and bolts to fit into, and you can put floppy silicone tool holders on them to keep things from rolling off. Plus, they fold up nicely!
Great idea! It must actually be an old ironing board I imagine. The new ones feel like they’re made of paper clips and gum.
No idea how old it is, it had started to rust so my wife was done with it. First thought was the scrap pile, then I realized as it sat in the corner of the garage that I could give it a far more useful life now!
So it might be paper clips and gum, but it’s the premium paper clips and the gum’s hardened into epoxy.
Also, never forget Rule #1 – always, always, ALWAYS remove the fill plug before draining. Not only does it make the fluid flow more easily, but more importantly, you won’t find yourself in the perilous situation of an empty sump with no easy way to fill it.
Based on the first sentence, I was really hoping for a shot of Torch with a cigar clenched in his teeth, maybe sporting a safari jacket.
And a loaf of French bread too.
Mon Dieu!
Je pense que tu veux dire: Sacre bleu, c’est tout ensemble(ish)!
Anyway, congrats on the ‘Don’t get it right, just get it running’ success.
“Don’t get it right, just get it running” should be the 2CV Owners’ Club motto.
I have a 2-car garage as well as a couple of car-ports, and I still use my truck tailgate for a workbench.
The project looks great!
Same here, I have my pickup in the garage and a workbench next to it, but pull whatever vehicle I’m working on up to the back of the truck and drop the tailgate for a handy workbench right next to the vehicle.
In my youth, I meticulously maintained all my vehicles. At 50, I’m so chronically burned out that I’ll do things like leave ripped CV boots for years. If it still works, it’s not broken. At least not broken enough to spend three nights lying on my back in the driveway.
Parts store employee:
“So do you also need 2CV boots?”
Angry Bob: “No, I only need 1! And don’t give me the real thing either, I only want the kit”