Alert! Alert! Alert! Everyone, pay attention, dammit, I have Weinermobile news! Oscar Mayer Wienermobile news, dammit, so drop whatever you’re doing, I don’t care if it’s a firehose or a surgical scalper or tattoo gun or crying infant – this is hot-dog-vehicle-related information, and that means you pay attention. Got it? Good.
Okay, so we’re in a bit of an emergency situation, Wienermobile-wise, and it’s proving to be a colossal PR disaster. Now, I know you’re likely thinking that, hey, this is Oscar Mayer’s problem, why the hell should we care, and that makes me want to slap somebody, so help me. This is a hot dog problem, which is just another way of saying this is a human civilization problem. I’ve had just about enough guff out of you, so let’s get back to the issue.
All of this stems from this video clip that appears to be going quite viral:
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See what’s going on there? A hapless Oscar Mayer Wienermobile appears to be stuck in a tunnel, in what may be the most Freudian-coded of vehicular mishaps ever recorded in automotive history. A giant hot dog stuck in a tunnel? Old Sigmund must be dry-humping in his grave.
And that’s what made me a bit suspicious; this is just too on the nose. So, to get to the truth, I decided to reach out to my contact who works directly with Oscar Mayer’s Wienermobile outreach programs.
This is the same person who was our contact during the Wienermobile’s racing outings and has proven to be an invaluable Wienermobile-related news contact.
This contact confirmed that the video of the Wienermobile stuck in the tunnel is not real.
We live in a miserable era when it comes to truth: AI has eroded so much of what we once relied on to confirm if things were real or not, and the ease by which completely AI-fabricated videos like this one can be created means there will be more and more fictional events passed off as genuine.
So, to reiterate, a Wienermobile was not stuck in any tunnel.
Now, it’s not like Oscar Mayer doesn’t have their own sordid history of Wienermobile misinformation – remember when they tried to convince the world they were changing the name of their iconic hot dog-shaped vehicles to Frankmobiles? That was a clumsy hoax, and I called them out.
And Wienermobile accidents definitely do happen: back in 2024 one of the smaller, Mini-based Wienermobiles had a rollover incident, for example. I mention all of this just to drive home the point that serious Wienermobile events absolutely do happen, and fabricating ones only serves to muddy the hot dog water.
So, again, let’s just make this clear:
The Wienermobile has NOT been stuck in a tunnel.
Anyone spreading false information about that large sausage-shaped car embedded and stuck in a tight, unyielding tunnel is guilty of spreading false Wienermobile-based misinformation, which I believe is considered a war crime by the Geneva Convention, and should be prosecuted to the full extent of the law, up to and possibly including vigilante justice.
This is not some fucking joke, people. This is Wienermobile-related.
Several years ago my sister and I along with both of our families were staying near the headwaters of the Mississippi. For some reason there was a Weinermobile parked in the parking lot of the hotel where we were staying. No special festival or event was going on that we could find locally it is as if someone working at Oscar Mayer took the keys and went on a little vacation.
Naturally we took some fun pics and checked it out up close.
For as long as ol’ Sig has been dead dry humping indeed. Bone dry
Then there’s the famous Dog ‘n Suds hot dog car, a double-ended Crosley…
https://www.flickr.com/photos/hammer51012/3522657757
Genius on two counts – the ‘46-48 Crosley styling with pontoon fenders really looks like a hot dog in a bun; and the slogan, “Any way you go, you can’t go wrong eating at…”
It sat behind the Lafayette, IN drive in for so many decades that it showed up on Google Maps. Mysteriously this car disappeared a few years ago and is rumored to be in the hands of a collector who wants some serious pork for it.
https://youtu.be/JZpxaiNV_sM?t=151
Before AI we never sausage a convincing video. Appreciate the frank reporting
The gibberish sign at the top of the tunnel and on the license plate give it away.
Damn, I hate AI. And fake news. And rage bait.
Nobody’s a weiner.
Is the Mini version referred to as a Cocktail Weinermobile?
Not sure, but I have it on good authority that Dieselgate-era VW variants were called Lil’ Smokies.
Unless you’re in Austria…
I figured it was more of a Vienna Sausage.
Wait! Does this mean the incident where the Weinermobile got stuck entering a garage (or trying to turn around and thinking reverse while driving into the wrong portal) was also fake?
https://www.nbcnews.com/id/wbna31975215
I think you mean the Vienna Convention in this case.
Enter the Wienerfleet.
Why is the “bun” yellow and is it that hard to make it the shape of a bun? AND if it’s innuendo, why shove the bun in the tunnel? It’s recursive. Like a tur-duck-en.
I’m beginning to think this whole reality is fake (and lame).
Oscar Mayer labels are yellow and red, I’m sure that has an influence on the color palette
For a wiener story to cut the the mustard you would expect more links.
Does that have Esperante GTR-1 tail lights on it (I’m sure Panoz didn’t develop them but I don’t know what they originally came off of)?
You have an Oscar Meyer Hot LINE?!?
Tell me you have a shelf full of red Ericofons, all with no dials just hard wired to top tier lunchmeat provisioners, underground tail light speakeasies and the guy who knows why Marvel Mystery Oil smells so good.
See if I bat an eye.
…contact who works directly with Oscar Mayer’s Wienermobile outreach programs
Of course, Jason has the Weinermobile VP on speed dial. Why are we not surpised!!
“You’d be at the mouth, you be at—you be at the mouth of the—the mouth of the tunnel right there. You know what I mean?” Ghostface Killa, Heart Street Directions