I Had To Know How Crane Operators Use The Bathroom And Now I Do So It’s Time You Know, Too

Have you ever driven by a construction site with a colossal crane and looked up at the little cab that the crane operator is ensconced in all day? I know I have. And I’m not sure why, exactly, but I’ve always found these little cabs strangely fascinating, a tiny habitat and workspace up in the sky for a tiny person to skillfully operate a Godzilla-scale machine. The operators of those cranes are in there for entire shifts, nine solid hours, so what is life like in those cabins? What sort of accommodations are made for comfort, for breaks, for biological needs? What I’m getting at is, of course, the big question for any situation where humans are stuck into little containers for any period of time: how do they use the can?

It’s a valid question! And if it’s one that you haven’t wondered, even in passing, as you glance up at the mechanical majesty of a massive crane, then I’d suspect that you’re some sort of cold, unfeeling android, because wondering how people pee and poo up in a crane is as human as laughter and love. Maybe even more so.

Are cranes vehicles? No, not really. But they are huge mechanical constructs that can be driven by a human, so I think that makes them viable subjects for our happy little website here, and, besides, this is how I got sidetracked while researching something else, so I still need to turn this into a post. So here we are.

I think the most surprising thing I found is that there really isn’t any official way for crane operators to relieve themselves while on the job, up in their cabs in the sky. It’s surprising not just from a human comfort standpoint, but an economic standpoint as well; you would think the construction companies would want easy, efficient ways for their crane operators to relieve themselves while still at their station, since it can take from five minutes to half an hour to descend a crane to the ground in many cases. That’s a big chunk of time!

Beijing-based crane operation company Ihurmo has quite a comprehensive page addressing the crane operator/bathroom problem, and even breaks down the main options and solutions into this handy chart:

As you can see, in-cabin solutions are “not industry-standard” and have “hygienic/privacy concerns,” and while I can’t argue with any of this, I suspect that in reality, in-cabin solutions are likely fairly common. It didn’t take much searching to find some direct evidence of this, thanks to this video from an actual crane operator who shows his solution to relieving himself in his cabin:

Yes, it’s as simple as you may have thought: he pees in a bottle, then takes the bottle back down with him in his bag. In the video, the crane operator helpfully shows not just an empty urine-receptacle bottle, but one already filled with clear, saffron-colored healthy urine, for proof. Honestly, peeing in a bottle seems so much more safe and time-efficient than exiting the crane and making your way down to either the ground or to a porta-potty set somewhere on the construction site.

But urine is easy! What about solid wastes? Happily, there are real crane operators willing to show all of us curious normies just how they poop inside their control cabin if they need to.

This first demonstration is pretty crude, but effective: a simple bucket and some hygiene products. The crane in question looks to be one without a fully enclosed glass cabin, which has the advantage of freeing unpleasant odors but must also make the poopist feel somewhat exposed.

@sgtowercrane How do crane operators go to the toilet to poop? This is how I take a dump! ???? With a breeze ???? #craneoperator #towercrane ♬ original sound – Memezerino

That’s not the only way, though; this crane operator in a fully-enclosed glass cabin demonstrates his more sophisticated setup, which includes an accordion-style collapsing portable toilet, which takes up shockingly little room when compressed:

For those who wonder how tower crane operators use the bathroom LOL
byu/NYCcraneman incranes

I have to admit, I’m pretty impressed with that toilet setup! Honestly, sitting in a glass box towering above a city, taking a comfortable, leisurely turd seems quite pleasant to me. I’d almost consider the opportunity a job perk.

I decided to look for those collapsible toilets, and found that they’re quite affordable:

Forty bucks for the freedom to pinch a comfortable loaf absolutely anywhere? That’s what true freedom is, my friends, and don’t you forget it.

Even better, looking up the ads for these collapsible portable toilets also introduced me to my new favorite subcategory of advertising modeling: pretty ladies walking happily while carrying their own portable shitters:

Look how happy and carefree they are as they hit the town, ready to take on everything, confident in the knowledge that at any moment, should they choose to, they can just flip that baby out and defecate to their bowel’s content, anywhere, anytime, all while remaining stylish and on the go! Going out for a night of sushi and drinks and clubbing? Bring that cute blue shitter with you that matches your eyes so well! Girls’ night out that could go all night? Just sling your accordion crapper over your shoulder and never be held back by your irritated bowel syndrome ever again!

Man, what a world!

There’s one other interesting possibility for crane pooping, one that you may have observed yourself: the suspended porta-potty. This approach got some attention fairly recently when this video of one falling off a crane and onto a road went viral:

Yeesh. Now, it’s worth noting that the hanging porta-potty isn’t quite what it seems: no one is actually inside those things while they’re being suspended. Usually, these are used to provide a porty-potty on demand for workers on high-rise construction projects. These are placed in high locations by the crane, used, and then returned to the ground after the work shift.

That said, I did encounter one reference to a crane-sling porta-potty being utilized in a somewhat different way; a Greenville, South Carolina paper ran a column explaining how a porta-potty dangling from a crane on a local construction project was used:

Q: Why does the crane on Washington Street have a portable toilet dangling from a rope on the side, about halfway down?

Amy in short: It’s not to prevent theft or unauthorized use. It’s for the crane operator’s bodily functions, but he doesn’t ever actually go inside.

A bit more: Climbing the 13-story-tall crane to start a day’s work is about a 30-minute process for the crane operator, said Jessica McCoy, marketing coordinator for builders Brasfield & Gorrie.

Once he’s up there, the company would like him to stay. So he carries his food and drinks with him for the nine-hour shift and takes his breaks up there. And there’s a plan in place to accommodate his bodily functions.

A funnel inside the cab is attached to a tube that drains waste into the portable toilet attached to the side of the crane’s mast.

Wow, so in this case, there’s a funnel in the cabin acting as a sort of ersatz urinal, and the flow of that funnel is routed into the urine storage of the porta-potty. Couldn’t they have used something smaller for the urine collection? Maybe they wanted something that already had systems in place to dispose of the waste, which I assume the porta-potty company handled?

That’s the only example I could find of a crane-suspended porta-potty being used in any capacity while suspended, but it could be an established method, too.

I appreciate you indulging all of my scatalogical fascinations here, but I really have always wondered about this, and I suppose I feel, well, relieved knowing how it all works for those skilled people in boxes in the sky.

Top graphic image: DepositPhotos.com