Something I love about this community is that our commenters either add context to a story or bring jokes. And sometimes you get both! This week, we had tons of jokes, and amusingly, a ton of them were for the last Comment Of The Day.
Yesterday’s COTD featured Nsane In The MembraNe’s joke about how Dodge and Ram have largely marketed their vehicles over the past two decades. Today, we have a COTD within the COTD! Ash78:
THE NEW RAM V8 BRAWNDO: IT BURNS WHAT PLANTS GAVE™
It also has LED “electro-lights” to blind oncoming drivers, which in conjunction with the new Steviewander Lane Assist can help ensure you drive straight and true while everyone else around you dies slowly in a miasma of regret for their beta cuck lifestyles!
Taargus Taargus:
Boy for someone who owns a Chrysler van, I sure have done well beating up Stellantis this week.
I kid because I care.
Mechjaz:
Huh. I kidded because I wasn’t careful enough.
JJ:
…and that’s how you end up with a Chrysler van.
Aaronaut:
Oh snap! Why DON’T we get a Hemi Caravan??
Ash78:
“Erm, actually, the torque steer in the regular Pentastar version is already approaching our acceptable limits of…”
PUNCH
Transverse V8 Vans for Everyone!
Yesterday evening, I wrote about the world’s first solid-state battery electric motorcycle. I was skeptical, but Arch Duke Maxyenko figured it out:
Turns out it’s actually just 1,000 gerbils in a trench coat.
Finally, have you ever wondered how folks in Germany saw GM’s front-drive sport sedans? Martin Dollinger:
Being from Bavaria and barely a teenager in 1987, I thought the Bonneville was one of the best-looking cars, period. I still think the slim headlights and pointed indicators look really good.
Fun fact: The Bonneville was available in Germany back then through certain big Opel (GM) dealers, but I would be surprised if they even sold 100 of them in all of Germany.
However, I still have a German edition Bonneville brochure in my collection.
Have a great evening, everyone!
Top graphic images: stock.adobe.com; Stellantis
Happy to pile on! I mean, uh, to be included!
It’s truly been a Stellantis (not pictured) week for us.
Almost 22 years since I first joined The Old Site and I love to see the spirit is still going, along with so many of the old familiar users (Archduke, Mechjaz, countless others).
Also, I still have no idea how Mercedes does it.
“Can you give us 1500 words on the RV show?”
“Yep, I think I have one working car out of 26…”
“Wait, you have 26 cars?”
“Technically some bikes and a bus.”
“OK, so how about that article?”
“Sure, can I knock it out on my phone while sleeping in the back of a Murano CC?”
“You do you.”
Maybe the Bonneville would have sold better if rebadged as the Guttenburg
This June….Hugh Bonneville…and Steve Guttenberg return to the big screen in Paddington Academy
They said the Ursine Police Force would be brutal, insensitive, and hungry. And they were right. Join the adventure…if you can bear it!
I would support this if the Ferrari 250GT Breadvan was renamed “Der Glutenburg” for Germany.
Crazy to think:
1970s-me would be like, “There’s England, and Europe”
1980s-me would be like, “I might go to England some time, and I might go to London, and see a weird German car I’d never see in the US”
1990s me would be like, “I might go to Germany some time and see a weird English car”
2000s me would be like, “I might go to Italy some time and see awesome cars in contrast to weird other-European cars”
2010s me was “oh wow, there’s a shit-ton of random cars in Europe.”
2020s me is “yeah, whatevs, how many kinds of EVs you got.”
My first trip to Europe I sat in the Zurich airport sooooo excited to see some of the trucks I had only seen in Euro Truck Sim 2. Man, I gotta get back into that game. I bet it’s come a long way since I last played.
Each of the major EU countries tend to be a bit proud of their local brands. But what surprised me most about the last time I was in France is not the French cars, the EVs, and not the funky quadraycles but the sheer number of Toyota Corolla wagons roaming the streets.
Talk about an ideal car that can do anything. Reasonable size for tight city streets & parking, hybrid for fuel efficiency and serious pep off the line, and large enough for being a taxi at the airport to pickup a family with luggage.
“…the sheer number of Toyota Corolla wagons roaming the streets.”
Leftovers from the cars supplied for the bicycling teams at the Paris Olympics?
A perfect vehicle for taking the whole family to watch the TdF, or to bring your own bikes for a ride in the countryside.
So much this. I spanned out my European travel across three phases — late 90s (as a single student studying abroad), late oughts (married couple), and then a few trips in the past couple years (family of 4).
I used to marvel at how many SEATs I would see around Spain, or how Lancia seemed to only exist within the borders of Italy.
Last couple trips — Corolla Hybrid Wagons. Everywhere. And suddenly I wanted one because we can’t get them.