For our final Showdown of this short week, we’re taking a look at a couple of two-door coupes from out in the desert – one near Santa Fe, and one a stone’s throw from Mexico. They’re close to the same size, have the same engine displacement, and the same number of forward gears, but nothing else in common.
You weren’t too impressed by yesterday’s cars from Maine, and frankly, neither was I. I mean, I guess I’d take the truck, because I don’t know what I’d do with the Edge, but as trucks go, a Dodge with the 4.7 wouldn’t be my first choice. Or second, or ninth, frankly. But I had to commit to the single-syllable bit, and those are what I found. I’m sure you understand.
I was amused by the tales of rusty cars in Maine, though. It sounds a lot like Minnesota in that regard. I had cars in Minnesota that were so rotten they couldn’t be jacked up anymore, cars that I bought with weeds growing through the floor, even a car that I always had to keep between 1/4 and 1/2 tank of gas; any more would leak out, and any less was too little to reach the rusted-out pickup tube in the tank. The difference? Maine has vehicle inspections. In Minnesota, if there’s enough good metal left to bolt a license plate to, you can register it.
You’ll be happy to know there are no rust worries with today’s cars. “California car” has become synonymous with “no rust,” but the Golden State isn’t the only place to look for cars if you’re trying to avoid the tin worm. There’s a whole swath of the country, from west Texas all the way to the Central Valley in California, that doesn’t get much precipitation and therefore doesn’t salt the roads. Cars there get sun-baked, vinyl cracks and paint fades, but corrosion isn’t something anyone really thinks about. With that in mind, here are a pair of coupes, both with six-cylinder engines displacing 2.8 liters. Let’s see what you make of them.
1970 Mercedes-Benz 250C – $4,600
Engine/drivetrain: 2.8-liter OHC inline 6, four-speed automatic, RWD
Location: Santa Fe, NM
Odometer reading: 87,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
Now this, right here, is a damn fine automobile. The W114/115 chassis cars from Mercedes were built during a time when the company didn’t give a shit about status, or styling trends, or gadgets; the only thing that mattered was making the best car possible. That single-minded pursuit of excellence is what made this car a status symbol; once upon a time, quality was cool. And this is the coolest version Mercedes ever built: the W115 pillarless hardtop coupe. Style may not have been this car’s primary focus, but boy, does it have it.
I was a little confused by this ad at first, because it’s listed as a 250, which should mean a 2.5-liter engine. But the seller clearly states, among many other details, that it’s a 2.8. I looked it up, and sure enough, in 1970 Mercedes used the larger 2.8-liter engine in US-market cars with 250 badges to offset the power loss from newly-required emissions controls. It’s fed by twin Zenith carburetors, and drives the rear wheels through a four-speed automatic. The seller tells us that this is a three-owner car, but the same mechanic has taken care of it its whole life. It runs and drives fine, and the seller is confident it could be driven daily.
It looks good inside, and we all know that M-B Tex upholstery will outlive us all. The seller does say that the dash top is cracked, which is no surprise in the southwestern sun, and it currently has a cover on it. I do like that it’s old enough to have the cool steering wheel with a ring for the horn button, and a column-mounted shifter. It feels more special than the black plastic steering wheel and gated floor-mounted shifter that was so ubiquitous in 1970s and 80s Benzes.
It has a couple of blemishes outside, but nothing major. I do kind of wish it were a more exciting color, but this taupe-gray suits it well. And since it’s a 1970 model, it escapes the indignity of the 5 MPH bumpers that later W114s had to deal with. Oh, and before you ask: yes, it’s a proper hardtop. The rear quarter windows do roll down.
1981 Pontiac Phoenix SJ – $2,950
Engine/drivetrain: 2.8-liter OHV V6, four-speed manual, FWD
Location: El Paso, TX
Odometer reading: 116,000 miles
Operational status: Runs and drives well
This one isn’t such a fine car. It is, however, a very important car, at least in the history of General Motors. The front-wheel-drive X-body, introduced in 1980, was a sales success in all its forms, but due to its half-baked design and shoddy construction, it was a disaster as well. Recalls and lawsuits plagued the X-body throughout its run, but GM kept refining and improving the design. The basic architecture established by this car was the basis for GM’s FWD cars for the next three decades. Chevy’s version, the Citation, is the most famous version, but here we have the Pontiac flavor, known as the Phoenix.
This Phoenix has an uncommon drivetrain combination: it has the optional 2.8-liter V6, but with a manual transmission. It’s a four-speed, and if I remember right, fourth gear is an overdrive. In 1981, the V6 had a two-barrel carburetor and put out 110 horsepower, hardly a fire-breather, but pretty good for the time. The seller says it runs “excellent,” but it’s being sold by a dealer, so don’t expect any history with it.
Inside, it’s in surprisingly good shape. The upholstery is faded, in a specific pattern that makes me think it was parked regularly in the sun in the same place. But everything is intact, except for a couple of cracks in the dash top. The seller makes a big deal out of pointing out that it has air conditioning, which leads me to believe it works. Otherwise, why draw attention to it?
This two-door notchback coupe style wasn’t offered on the Chevy Citation; it was strictly a Buick/Olds/Pontiac bodystyle. It’s all original and rust-free, but the paint is hammered. That hot desert sun really does a number on cars. This looks like a good candidate for trying out a DIY paint job, if you were so inclined.
These two are a classic example of how two cars can be similar on paper, but completely different in reality. On one hand, you have a finely-crafted example of German engineering, and on the other, a classic exercise in GM badge engineering. One has a smooth inline six driving the rear wheels, and the other has a V6 with a stickshift, making the front wheels torque-steer. It sounds like an easy choice, except that the Mercedes probably doesn’t have air conditioning, and it costs considerably more. You’ve got a whole three-day weekend to decide if it’s worth it.
I live in the Land of Enchantment, in the city made famous by Bugs Bunnys poor map reading skills. Both cars are near enough to me to make either of these worth a look, because both would be delightful oddities at the local car shows. This is an academic exercise, since my corral of hoopties is at Wife Maximum Tolerance capacity, meaning that I would have to sell one of my beloved shitboxes to make room. I no longer have the patience to people for extended periods (above 15 minutes), so, selling one of my beloved messes to the general public is not an option. Therefore, this pro/con monologue is for entertainment purposes only.
Pro Mercedes: It’s a Mercedes, when Mercedes meant that it would outlive a parrot, given proper care. Mercedes of that vintage become heirlooms, like the 800 pound armoire that you somehow inherited from THAT great-aunt. It looks to be in good shape, and if the same mechanic has truly been maintaining it from day one, it likely is. Fanta Se has a surprising number of well-heeled denizens, and the high-end luxury or exotic sports cars to go with the money. There are also the qualified mechanics to maintain them.
Con Mercedes: It is a 1970 Mercedes. If you are attempting to restore or maintain any 1970 vehicle that is not a muscle car, replacement parts are hard to find. Mercedes parts are expensive to begin with, so vintage parts may cost more than a Space Shuttle. Once it breaks, it becomes a very expensive piece of lawn art.
Pontiac Phoenix Pros: The fact that the GM velour interior has not turned to motes of toxic dust says that an X-body that has survived this long has been lovingly maintained. it has the 2.8 V6, which is always better than the Iron Duck, unless you prefer glacial acceleration and more vibrations than an unbalanced clothes washer during the spin cycle. It’s a standard transmission, which is an infinite improvement over the 3-speed TH-125 slushbox. SInce the X-body spawned the FWD A, J and N platforms, there are a lot of parts available for repair, replacement or upgrade.
Pontiac Phoenix Cons: It’s a rare (but not valuable) body style. Frankly, that car is so ugly it would make a train take a dirt road. It’s a two-door, so the doors sag. A lot. Don’t park anywhere near a curb unless you want to scrape concrete. GM door handles of that era fail with amazing frequency, and the reproduction handles are of…questionable quality. Lastly; vacuum. Vacuum hoses and other related parts dry rot in NM and west TX. Fast. The 2.8 V6 from that era has somewhere between 20 and 1,500 vacuum hoses, a charcoal canister, and the worst 2 barrel carb ever made. I know, I owned a 1983 S-10 with the same motor. Maintaining timing, idle, or consistent fuel economy is a fool’s game. The HVAC system is vacuum-driven, with a silicone/rubber manifold, dashpots, servos and so on all behind that narrow dash, and all of those parts are made of unobtainium. You might be able to adapt some parts from S-10s or F-bodies of the same era, but those reproduction parts are costly and of indifferent quality. So, not much different from when the car was nearly new.
Final Analysis: If you like to bet on double-zero at the roulette wheel, you have the Platinum AAA subscription with unlimited tows, you have owned more than one British automobile with Lucas Electronics and are willing to purchase another, or you just don’t have enough stress in your life, either of these cars are made for you.
To be fair, the Pontiac is better than either of yesterday’s piles, which were janky AND gross in the case of the truck. The stick shift makes it interesting, and it look like it’s in good shape.
But that Benz is truly fine, and a well cared for car, it appears. Tough luck for the Pontiac.
How is there even a question here? This is comparing fine wine to a bottle of piss.
The Mercedes, obviously. And the price of the Phoenix (that should be returned to ashes) has an extra zero in it.
Stick is always preferred above automatic.
Pontiac.
Is this some sort of sick joke???
I cannot imagine a scenario in which I would vote for an X body for anything except the crusher. They were turds brand new and 40+ years of aging doesn’t hep any.
That the Benz is desirable and a good driver is a huge plus beyond that. Yeh, no A/C stinks, but that could be fixed for enough dollars, probably doubling the investment in it. Still might be worth it.
Looks like there are 46 people who need their membership revoked.
I won’t settle for anything less. However the Mercedes is a low bar to start with. Anything less would include that Phoenix.
The MB 250c is a fantastic car and a bargain at that price! I had one for a while, copper brown with a tan/brown interior. It was solid, surprisingly fast, and made every drive feel special. IIRC it had 160hp. Unfortunately I lost my job and had to sell it to pay for a move. 🙁
It might have been a fun thought exercise to put the Pontiac up against a K-car Reliant or a Ford Tempo. As is, this is not remotely a difficult choice.
This was one of the easiest Showdowns ever…as soon as I saw Phoenix, it was all over. What a total piece of junk. I love and miss Pontiac but that was basically their worst car. It is cool w/ the stick but that’s it. That legendary Merc is total luxury, style, and great design. I really like it and will enjoy it a lot
Let’s see… a car that was designed because we have to bring an econobox to market against our will, or a car that was designed to live life as a taxi on the African Continent? The MB even has the good ole SOHC six and not the horrible twin cam with the Solex spread bore 4bb made with castings that warp horribly. Trying to set those carbs to operate properly after 50k miles was impossible.
Those carbs were the punishment for being too cheap to spring for ze Einspritzen. The 2.8 fuel-injected twin-cam is a thing of absolute delight, having had some experience of a friend’s gray-market w123 280E.
The Mercedes is the clear winner here… it’s not far from being a really pretty daily driver. If you wanted a bigger project, it’s a candidate for a 5.0 or 350 swap to get you moving around a bit more quickly.