It was 3 am. It was a moment of weakness, wrapped in boredom, and buried in my comforter. I was sure my wife was asleep, so I rolled over and fired up my phone. I shielded the screen so that, if she were to stir, she wouldn’t see what I was doing. Then I began scrolling.
There was no specific destination in mind, but, as most of these little digital forays go, I was looking for something exotic to me. Maybe Swedish? Usually, wherever I start, it ends up Swedish. I found a few of the early generation CrossCountry Volvo wagons I liked for sale nearby on Facebook Marketplace. ‘That could be fun!’ I casually thought to myself, before moving on to stickshift trucks. Eventually, I got tired and went back to sleep.
That was about a month ago, and ever since that moment, I’ve been bombarded with reminders that what I need is a P2 generation XC70, and that I need to lift it in a very specific way. I have a car that I like, and while I’ve pondered replacing it, it’s not something I can do right now.
The algorithm doesn’t want me to love one I’m with, it wants me to love a 2007 Volvo XC70 with somewhere between 130-180k miles on it. It won’t stop.
From Facebook Marketplace To Instagram To Every Conversation
When I speak of “the algorithm,” I’m giving a name to various recommendation engines across a number of platforms. While they’re weighted to work in slightly different ways, the goal is always to produce a reaction in me that can lead to more engagement, and therefore more commerce for the platform itself.
In exchange for my attention, I can buy or sell a car through a terrible and mostly awkward process. I think anyone who uses Facebook Marketplace knows that it’s a deeply broken system (it also offered me up lactation cookies and a bandana from the scariest man I’ve ever seen in my life). It has scale, though, and over time, it learns what my deepest and darkest desires are. I just logged in and was immediately offered three Volvo wagons, a Taurus SHO, a Honda moped, and a Baja.
I’ve owned two Volvo wagons before, so I’m always at risk of having a third, but it’s mostly the RWD ones I’m into. Ideally, I want another car with a manual if I’m going to replace the car I have now. Also, I’m not trying to necessarily replace the car I have right now, but this is how brains work.
If it were just Facebook Marketplace, I think I’d be ok with it. It’s a classifieds platform, that’s the gig. But somehow, Instagram (also owned by Meta) got in on it, so this happened next:
That’s a lifted XC70, also a P2, and it now just looks right to me.
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And then this:
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That video is promoting the diesel engine available in the P2 in Europe, but not, so far as I know, offered in the United States. This is a little more recent, and it’s so on the nose that it almost hurts to look at it (although I sent it to my wife and friends):
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Damn, got me. It’s true, nobody will remember how much I made (enough) or how many hours I worked (more than enough). No, they will remember my… 18-year-old Volvo wagon I don’t even own? What’s screwed up about this is that it’s worked on me.
The Algorithm Is Tuned All Wrong
You could argue that Facebook merely unearthed a yearning I had within me, and the constant bombardment of cars for sale, reels, and posts was helping me admit to myself what I want.
Alternatively, I might argue that the Internet was supposed to be about discovery, or at least I thought that was the whole deal. What social media and “the algorithm” are doing is finding the dopamine receptors in my brain and firing them up like one of those fireworks displays gone wrong on Instagram.
The algo is now creating something a bit like The Entertainment from David Foster Wallace’s Infinite Jest. While that particular novel is mostly read on public transport by people hoping desperately that they’ll get asked about it and that the inquirer will be so impressed with the description of the book that they’ll jump their bones right then and there, it also has a point. Within the novel, there’s a film that’s so entertaining that it overwhelms the viewer to the point that they can no longer take care of themselves. Entertainment as an irrepressible addiction.
That’s what’s happening to me, but with old Volvos. It’s also what’s happening with HBO, Warner Bros, and Netflix. HBO is kind of an incredible place, producing shows that aren’t necessarily ones that the algorithm would think to produce. There’s The Sopranos, The Wire, and Flight of the Conchords. All shows I don’t think would end up on Netflix originally, because what Netflix does is largely make shows for the algorithm.
This doesn’t mean there’s not a place for that. Is It Cake is a TikTok and Instagram fad that’s been turned into a game show, and I still enjoy it. You can have both, I suppose, but just being told what to think and enjoy by your inner kinks doesn’t feel healthy to me.
Would you get another The Wire from the algorithm? Or would you just get 900 variations of Love Is Blind and a show called Six-Seven?
I Still Want One, Though
When I have downtime, I’ve been going on the various platforms to see what’s available. It’s not that I’m going to pull the trigger anytime soon, but now I must inform myself of the market for when that moment comes.
I did try to convince a friend who was looking for a cheap, safe car for his kid to check out this 2003 model, which has 191k miles on the clock but otherwise looks good. Perhaps I can learn something from his experience.
There’s this one on Facebook marketplace that seems to be the top of the market, due in part to its curiously low miles (too low for me, I think). Having fallen so deeply and regularly into the rabbit hole that they’ve erected a cot for me, I am mostly convinced I’m going to get a clean stock one and do the work myself.
A company called Bad Swede has a two-inch lit kit, and that seems about how much space I’d want. That, plus some wheels and A/T tires, and I could have a car that’s comfortable on the inside and unstoppable on the outside.
Why? To what true end? I don’t know. It’s just who I am now.
If I wanted to go bought-not-built, there’s a 2007 Ocean Race that’s fairly close to my aesthetic:
I do like the shimmering dark blue from the other Ocean Races a little better, but I’m not that picky. I also appreciate that this doesn’t have some obnoxious LED lights on (yet).
Obviously, I do not have a parking space for it. I do not have the excess funds I want to dedicate to it. If I want to drive a Volvo, I can always ask Volvo, and they’ll send me one. I could be putting this energy into making my own BMW better, but now I do this. This is my life now. My wife and child are sick of hearing about the low-pressure turbo inline-five and how it’s probably not a maintenance nightmare, and that people complaining are mostly thinking of the V70R…
Send help (or Volvo links).
Top graphic images: Volvo; DepositPhotos.com
When I was in vocational school, I got “appointed” to an engine swap project on one of these withthe5 cylinder. The entire car had one foot in the grave, (someone a couple of years earlier messed up a timing belt change, hence the swap, pretty bad interior, rust, but it had strut spacersin the front!) so there weren’t any big stakes, but I still enjoyed working on it. I always thought the generation after this was one of Volvos prettiest cars, but I warmed to this one too. Long story short, we didn’t get it running in the school year I was there, due to a problem with the ECU. If I’m not mistaken, they have gotten it going since, and I have an agreement with the teacher that if he ever wants to sell it, he’ll call me first.
I have one with the turbodiesel 5 in the exact same colour as the one shown above with the bow on it (don’t shame me; it was the only manual one for sale in the north of England at the time. Also, what colour even IS that?). It is great, if somewhat noisy. You should buy one.
Where’s the love for Craigslist? Aside from a relatively short(and disastrous) foray in to charging for auto ads(among others), it’s been a far more reliable source than Marketplace, whether I’m looking to torture myself with vintage electronics, antique farm/industrial machinery, or classic/just plain used motor-powered vehicles of all types. It gets a bad rap after the Craigslist killer, but really, one is facing equal threat in that regard in all transactions, whether by bulletin board, classified ad, or online.
I drove a Volvo 740 turbo wagon for about 8 years.
Our Mercedes 240 D had a catastrophic oil loss followed by a seized engine, and somebody had given us a 20 year old rusted out Honda Civic.
My wife and I were taking a walk in Manhattan and a 740 turbo wagon stopped at a stoplight and I said I always wanted one of those, and my wife ran up to the driver and bought the car.
She really didn’t like that Honda.
Just FYI, whenever you link to images Instagram, those of us without accounts for it can’t see a thing. For Autopian articles, hosting the image files ON the Autopian server makes more sense to me, and it future-proofs the article from orphaned links in the future. JMHO.
I like mostly all of the P2 Volvos (I’ve got an ’04 XC90, as well as a 240 wagon) but my experience and impression from other owners of P2s is that they’re not particularly reliable or cheap to maintain when they get to be in their third decade of life. I’m not saying they’re particularly worse in these respects than comparable cars, just that a 25 year old Volvo, let alone one with an all wheel drive system (if optioned) isn’t going to be trouble-free on an ongoing basis. And as an occassional DIYer (back pain permitting) I’ll also note that there’s a LOT of plumbing in the turbo models… and all those little bits of hose get old, causing vacuum leaks, etc…
Again: I like these cars and understand their attraction, especially in light of how affordable a 150+Kmile example is these days vs anything new and most things more recent. And I’m sure you know everything I’ve said. But I thought I ought to say it anyway.
My neighbors had a beautiful V70R with a stick and traded it in on a newer Lexus NX 250. I was initially sad that I didn’t know they were doing that, but they had moved here (Seattle-ish) from Nebraska, so I have no idea how crusty it would have been underneath, and I was saved from some inevitable pain.
I for some reason am inundated with Nash Metropolitans. So many Metropolitans. Restored Metropolitans, and Metropolitans with big blocks for drag racing, Metropolitans made into barbecues. I had no idea there were so many.
That last silver 07 pictured is not an Ocean Race. All Ocean Races were an exclusive shade of blue and had badging.
I didn’t have an Ocean Race, but I did have a silver ’07 that I drove to the Ocean Race’s stop in Newport, RI last time around. As a Volvo owner I got free parking.
The P2 is a fantastic car, but I’d stay with the 05 and up. The earlier ones had transmission issues that were largely sorted by the 05 (mild) refresh. 01-02 are definitely a no-go, and 03-04 are still questionable. The best things about the 01-04 is the glass headlight lenses.
’07 is the best year, they all had the DTSC stability control standard. Iloved my ’07, it was largely reliable till about 220K miles. I recently traded it in towards a 2026 Ram, it turned 233,000 right as I turned into the dealer’s lot. It was at the point where I was just going to donate it, it had so many issues, but I got 2K for it so I was happy. The engine and trans were great, it just needed so many other little things. My own fault for relagting it to around town beater for the last 6 years I owned my 4Runner. (Traded that too).
This is the nearly impossible point that we have reached in life. Like you, I am named Matt, and own a very reliable, safe, excellent vehicle for myself and my loved ones. I also want to have a fun car, and the fun car kind of needs to have a manual since my daily doesn’t. Right now, the fun car is a Boxster, which is a great extra car on paper, but I am falling out of love and considering a replacement. There are so few manuals available and so many other cars that I want to have, but does it make sense to have another car that is also a practical people mover (esp with an automatic)? I want to own another w124 wagon, or maybe try my dream 5-series wagon? But shouldn’t the fun car fill some other niche? Race car? Monster truck? Coupe? Convertible?
Is it silly to want another lifted wagon, when your daily is basically a lifted wagon? That said, as long as we get to read about it, I support the gluttony, I am afraid of modern Volvo, but a P2 feels manageable and they look pretty righteous with a lift.
I have a friend who owns a Volvo mechanic shop (Swedemasters). His personal ride of choice? V70R in that beautiful shade of dark gray.
The thing people usually get upside down about advertising algorithms is they think they’re targeted for consumers.
Except a huge amount, often more than 50%, is driven by sellers.
When a local Ford dealer advertises a “Year End Saleabration!” they’re not pushing high demand vehicles, they’re trying to move the stuff that people didn’t want.
The same thing is true for online marketplaces. If Facebook doesn’t push a ton of crud, those sellers will switch to other ways of selling. Or maybe just give that car to a cousin’s kid.
Getting flooded by a certain type of ad often doesn’t mean an algorithm cares what a consumer wants. It often mostly reflects what sellers want and the platform wants.
I will not send you help or Volvo links. You are capable of finding the Volvo links yourself and should buy one of the cars on there.