What happens when an obsessed car enthusiast who was convinced he’d die alone meets the girl of his dreams, gets married, and has a child? Well, he finds himself both overjoyed and in a bit of a predicament, with far too many cars that…kind of don’t work for his lifestyle anymore. Why am I speaking in the third person? I have no idea, but I got zero sleep last night, so please bear with me as I talk about my current automotive dilemma now that most of my cars no longer work as daily transportation.
Over the past few weeks since welcoming my child, Delmar (not his real name), I have been driving around almost exclusively in my wife’s Lexus RX350.
Look, I’ve reviewed her 2017 RX350, and it is truly one of the best crossover SUVs money can buy — it rides great, it’s powerful, it’s spacious, it’s reliable, and on and on. But while it’s an impressive machine for how well it performs its intended function, it doesn’t exactly stir my soul. OK, I’ll say it: It’s a bit boring, and I’m starting to go crazy.
Obviously, complaining about driving a luxury SUV is very much a first-world-problem, but you know what I mean here. I’m a car-nut who is used to daily drive a 1965 Plymouth Valiant, a 1976 Postal Jeep, a 1992 Jeep XJ, a 1948 Willys CJ-2A, more recently a BMW i3S, and on and on. To go to a literally-beige Lexus crossover is a bit soul-crushing.
Anyway, I think it might make sense to go through my current collection of cars and evaluate their utility now that everything has changed for me and “my life is over” (as the young folks say).
1985 Jeep J10, 1989 Chevy K1500 Silverado
Let’s hop right into my biggest dilemma at the moment. I own two pickup trucks, and I cannot justify that, so I need to whittle it down to one.
On one hand, I have my 1985 Jeep J10, which has always been my dream truck. On the other hand, I bought a 1989 Chevy K1500 on a bit of a whim back in January because it was such a good deal, and you know what? It’s actually a great pickup. I think I’m comfortable saying that it’s much better than the J10, objectively speaking.
But that J10 purchase was never really a rational buy. I picked it up a decade ago because I think it looks badass, and also: It’s a bit of a relic of a bygone era. It’s got a carburetor, manual locking hubs, a true bench seat, a four-speed on the floor, a stamped tailgate, and a regular cab layout with an eight-foot bed. It is a truck’s truck.
The K1500 doesn’t have a carb, manual locking hubs, a stamped tailgate, or a regular cab, and its bed is only 6.5 feet long. But man is it a great daily driver; it rides like a cloud, its throttle body-injected 350 V8 fires up and generally runs quite smoothly, offering good power. And, crucially, it has two rows of seats.
That’s my concern with my J10: With only a single row of seats, does it really make sense to keep? I mean, I get that I don’t need space for my whole family in my daily commuter, since I’ll be driving to work alone, but the J10 isn’t my commuter — it’s my classic weekend cruiser and Home Depot runner. And for that, is it realistic that I’ll be just driving around all by myself without my wife and kid?
Should I keep the Chevy so I can take them with me, even though the J10 is clearly the cooler truck? I don’t have the answer.
[Editor’s Note: I guess we’re not talking about this? I’d have thought that could make this choice easier, but what do I know? – JT]
BMW i3S
The two daily drivers in our household are the Lexus and the BMW i3S, and that may make you wonder: “Why not just drive your beloved i3S instead of the Lexus?” It’s a fair question, especially given that the i3S is actually quite a safe car, having scored excellent marks in IIHS crash testing.
The issue is that the i3S is really not the most ideal family car. The big thing is that the infant car seat only just fits, and what’s more, getting the child in and out of that seat — especially when parked next to another car — is a huge pain in the ass. You end up getting stuck in this weird space between the rear door and the front door that needs to be open to release the rear door.
The overall interior volume isn’t bad — the entire continent of Europe has raised families in much smaller cars — but relative to the Lexus, the i3 is a pain in the Arsch for loading/unloading a baby.
I still plan to keep my i3, because I’m hoping once that seat becomes front-facing, it’ll be easier to install/remove young Delmar; plus, the i3 is the ideal one-person LA commuter. But there is part of me that wonders whether I should make sure all my cars can easily fit the whole family, or if it’s OK to have one or two that don’t.
Growing up, my dad had a 1998 Jeep Grand Cherokee as his commuter, and it only seats five, while there were eight in our family. We had a Chevy Astro as well, so I think having one car that easily fits everyone and one that doesn’t is OK. And again, once that seat can flip around, maybe it’s fine.
[Editor’s Note: Personally, I think an i3 is a completely fine baby car. Well, the getting-trapped-in-the-doors thing sounds annoying, but I took my kid all over the place in my ’73 Beetle, and it had half as many doors! An i3 is many orders of magnitude better than that, especially safety-wise. But the Beetle wins for helping to keep your baby smelling like gasoline, oil, and horsehair. – JT]
Jeep YJ, Ford Mustang
So we’ve talked about the trucks and the daily-driver, but what about my classic cars that are a bit less utilitarian — my Sunday cruisers? To me, the fact that these can fit a child (once he’s older) means they’re in the clear. No, I can’t drive these far on the freeway like I used to, because they’re not safe, but if baby-Delmar wants to cruise around town in the YJ old Mustang, I bet he’d love it! (My old CJ-3B will hopefully have found a new home by then).
I don’t really see any issue with keeping ’round-town classics that can fit a family. It’s just the J10 that has me worried, because there’s no second row. [Editor’s Note: It’s a bench seat in the J10! We’ve had three people in there before! I was even in the middle! Elise (NHRN) and Delmar (NHRN) could all cram in there! Just you know, it’s maybe not the safest.– JT]
Jeep Grand Cherokee ZJ 5-Speed, Diesel Manual Chrysler Voyager
There are two vehicle that I’m a little worried about, because they’re not really ’round-town-cruisers; their best trait is that they’re great road-trippers. Do I think it would be loads of fun to drive 35 mph in a 1994 Jeep Grand Cherokee five-speed or a diesel manual Chrysler Voyager? Not really.
At least with the Mustang you get a nice sounding V8 and a totally different driving experience than you’re used to, and with the YJ you get open-top fun. But the ZJ and minivan? They’re great on the open road, or in the case of the ZJ, overlanding off-road.
I’d love to keep them both, because they’re amazing machines, but if I can’t regularly drive them with my family on the freeway, I’m not sure how useful they’ll be.
Then again, how much of car collecting is really about usefulness. I mean, none of this is rational; should I even be trying to rationalize it? Yes, yes I should. I’m a family man now and I have responsibilities. Frivolities need to be curbed! Right?
[Editor’s Note: I disagree with that above sentiment entirely. Some people love to tell new parents that kind of thing (I think they just get a perverse pleasure at seeing new parents’ faces go ashen when they get told they’ll never have fun again) , and I suspect David has heard it plenty. But it’s bullshit. You don’t need to curb frivolity, automotive or otherwise. You just need to involve the kid in it, because they’ll love it. There’s no right way to be a parent, and every kid is different, but I’d counsel, as a fellow dad, to keep the cars he likes, because a happy parent is a good parent. – JT]
Step 1: Look into life insurance now as someone is depending on you and if something very unfortunate occurs The Autopian will stop sending paychecks. It’s remarkably inexpensive at your age.
Step 2: Give it six months of just the Lexus and see how much YOU actually drive the others anymore.
Step 3: Get rid of anything you literally have not driven in those six months.
Step 4: Use the proceeds from step 3 to get something that you don’t mind driving around that makes baby duty as simple as possible for you AND that your wife can/will drive when her car is in the shop.
Step 5: Realize why the RAV4 and CRV sell in such numbers as they do. Then just go in with your life and realize that priorities have changed a little bit but the overall joy of life is no less than it was and probably more.
Step 6: Check every couple of years to see if life insurance has for some reason actually reduced in price, it does happen, then re-enroll and extend the term for less outlay.
[I am aware this is my third post on this story. It lit a small fire in my brain.]
As to “it won’t baby” being a reason to give up a car you love, my parents are the 2nd and 4th owners of a car that absolutely won’t baby. In between those was ~30 years of regret that they sold it. Sometimes adulting is making hard choices, but it’s also sometimes listening to your heart and finding a way.
The answer is “No.” Just get a minivan, any minivan. They are comfortable, safe, spacious. In my 2003 Odyssey I have hauled the family, lumber, railroad ties, stones, spare parts, furniture, beds, dressers and book cases, kayaks, canoes, a Yakima box on top, towed trailers . . . Basically everything an SUV or a pickup can do. And you can use the back to change diapers, haul the stroller, get the groceries, etc.
This is the way. Buy a high-mileage Pacifica Hybrid for fun – the clicks would probably pay for themselves!
Don’t forget, most have a 3k tow capacity. I’m fully on team minivan.
R350, anyone? Or R63 AMG? That would definitely baby. And boogie.
Sounds like what you need is an E63 AMG Wagon
On a more general baby schlepping note: Permanent install infant seats are for suckers. You want one that uses bases and you want one more base than you have cars the kid will ride in.
This right here is the way. Keep them around for a few years aftger the kid has outgrown them jsut in case…
Yes, for the first few months those are awesome. Then they get a little bigger and have to go to the permanent ones, and it’s more of a pain. Then, you just get a car seat for each car.
Absolutely on also getting all the permanent seats. Our infant seats went to either 35 or 40lbs, so we were good for quite a while. Both kids graduated on height rather than weight.
If you get into a hand-me-down situation, just stay on top of the expiration dates.
Take it a step further, get the stroller where the car seat snap into that as well. Only take them out to feed and change.
I’ll add another vote for this. So much easier to put the infant in the seat, carry it out, and just stick it in the base. With the i3, it would probably even be possible to fold a seat down or remove headrests or something and just load the kid through the trunk hatch and not deal with the mini side doors.
The seat part can also be tied into a sled to tow backcountry skiing, and the handle sticking out is a nice rollbar for if/when the sled flips over, oops…
I had a 2-door Impreza 2.5RS when I had my first kid. I had the removable carseat with the base you mounted in the car, and that made things far easier. If you don’t already have a carseat like that, I’d suggest picking one up.
With our first kid, We had a Civic Coupe and a RAV4. Of course the RAV was better to get the kid in and out, and though it was a little cramped, we did road trips in the Civic with the kid rear facing in the back. Definitely the I3S can do as a pinch hitter.
Now with three kids, we have an Odyssey and a C-Max. One of the requirements for my daily driver is being able to fit everybody in if needed, like if the van was in the shop or something. We’ve done it a few times and it is cramped, but doable.
I don’t think you need to sell anything just yet, especially if you have the space for all of them, but it probably does make sense to slim down your fleet at some point. You just simply won’t have time to take care of them all.
While the babyseat seems like a huge hassle right now in the i3 (Because it is) it’s a relatively short peroid of time; that in the moment seems like it will last forever, but actually goes by very quickly. Before you know it little Delmar will jsut be sittng in a booster seat climbing in and out all on his own.
I would sell the Chevy, Plymouth, and the Grand Cherokee, and keep everything else. Your’e gonna need a truck to do turck things and the J10 also scratshes the old car upkeep itch, the Mustang is just a cool classic that I’d regret parting with unless I really needed the money, and the Wrangler has the same story.
This all holds true AT THIS MOMENT, if you and Elise decide one or even two babies isn’t enough; then you’ll need to re-assess, but cross that bridge when you get there.
You need ONE car that’s absolutely baby-capable and one car that will baby in a pinch. I think you’re fine with the Lexus and the i3. I’m still waiting for you to sell me the YJ 🙂
Exactly. We’ve always had the family-mobile (Suburban, and later an Expedition) but I wanted something smaller/cheaper/more fun to commute in, but still needed to fit kids in a pinch – Mustang. It isn’t *fun* to get kids into the back, but it *can*, which is why a Miata (or any other strictly 2 seater) wasn’t on my shopping list, despite my liking them in principle.
I was and am in a similar position (my daughter is now 3!).
When I met my wife, I had a 2017 Honda Fit (that was turned in for a 2008 Volvo C30), a single cab Tacoma (overlander), and a 1994 M Edition Miata.
Sold the Volvo for a Mazda3 hatch and sold the Tacoma for a crew cab Tacoma. Then sold both for a Ford Maverick. I still kept the Miata.
Although my daughter cannot legally ride in the Miata for a long while, she adores that car. Miata was one of her first words.
The way I see it, the perfect fleet is a family car, a truck (or offroader), and a fun car. In my case, I combined 2 of the 3.
If I were in your situation, I would sell most of the fleet (keep the Mustang and a Jeep) and get a hybrid Maverick. It fits an infant seat, can haul most of what you need to haul in the back, and has a fairly bulletproof drivetrain. It also gets 40mpg, so your new Californian side will be happy.
I wouldn’t worry about it too much keep in mind how many people throw the TBI away and carb swap them because they think it’s more reliable. I3 is basically a helmet so deal with it for a year. The first year feels the longest when you are doing it because you don’t sleep and you adjusting to that. I’ve seen many car guys panic and get rid of everything they think is unsafe when they have a kid only for the kid to go wow you had that why did you get rid of it and they question themselves too. So don’t make it about the kid. Maybe your next purchase you think about how will this work for me now. But thining you fleet just keep it to do I still like it can I keep it.
Agreed. This decision doesn’t have to be made quickly.
Wait, isn’t the Chrysler in Yurp? If so, it’s your Yurp car, just keep it.
For baby seats, I found my old ’90 Coupe DeVille far easier than my wife’s old Dodge Intrepid. With the Caddy, I could flop the front seat forward and STAND on the rear-seat floor, bent over, with plenty of leverage to get those straps tight. With the Intrepid (sedan), all I could do was open the back door and lean in. Not easy!
When I first had my son, my immediate concerns were having enough space for the infant car seat and safety. At this point, it isn’t all about you. You need to get something that will allow safe and spacious-enough transport for the day-to-day stuff.
In short: Minivan.
That said, you can keep some of the toys, but I suspect many of them will go just because you will have even less time for them than you do now. And they just won’t seem as important, because when that little guy smiles at you, you’ll turn into soft, creamy nougat.
Glad to.see the sleep deprivation is leading to missed canon already. Delirious Tracy writing is some of my favorite Tracy writing.
You’re looking at roughly 2-3 years where they’re rear facing where this is even a major consideration. Once they’re forward facing they fit more easily, can climb in on their own, etc.
You can stick with the vehicles you like for a couple years despite the hassle. And, because things like the J10 are off limits, they become forbidden fruit when they are old enough. Both of my kids went absolutely nuts to run errands in the truck once they were old enough, simply because it’s the truck.
And Now you understand why the majority of trucks are 4 doors with 4WD and have amenities that only came in high end American sedans at one time.
the correct choice for a daily is a 2000 to 2006 SIlverado.
https://mohave.craigslist.org/cto/d/peach-springs-03-duramax/7843467206.html
Or since you don’t mind weird. the ultimate swiss army knife is the Avalanche. https://lewiston.craigslist.org/cto/d/uniontown-2002-chevrolet-avalanche-z71/7845180246.html
By the way, My Daughter rolled to kindergarten quite often in a big block manual Camaro and a Scout with license plates for floors. But I was raised somewhat feral and in the age of Mom Arms for safety seats. So….
I might get flack for this. But fullsize crew cab trucks Baby VERY well.
My Silverado made my wife’s old CX-5 feel like loading a baby carrier into a clown car (it was not actually difficult, that’s just how easy the Silverado is).
To be fair, I have no kids, and no parental instincts, but it sounds like the Lexus and BMW are a pair of safe-enough, maybe a pain options for a baby. The rest are great for when the little rugrat gets cool and has a personality. Horde away!
Sell:
One of the pick-ups (choose, the other will be a project-lite, while being useful)i3YJZJVoyagerKeep:
MustangThe pick-up not soldBuy:
Something practical/reasonable/safe (it’s probably gonna be fairly boring)This should be obvious. You’ve got a kid now; expecting to have access to your wife’s car any time you need to take the kid, is unreasonable. It seems selfish to me to hoard extra cars, and compromise your role as a father, or expect SO to handle all baby schlepping duties.
That being said, if you can afford to buy the previously aforementioned vehicle and not sell everything, that’s also fine.
Heck, if this was me, I’d sell everything except the Mustang, and then get something like a Maverick/Colorado/Tacoma after testing to make sure a baby seat fits in the back. If it doesn’t fit, then I’d scoop up some relatively boring CUV/sedan/wagon and a utility trailer.
Keep the vehicles they bring you the most with the least amount of foreseeable maintenance. You will still be wrenching and at the start this will be taking time away from Elise and Delmar so it needs to be on something that makes you happy. My mom daily drove a 1990 Supra for a decade with two kids and midwestern winters. It was only a few years that it was a real pain for her dealing with car seats when we couldn’t be trusted to secure ourselves. The other family vehicle was a ZJ so we had fun and roadtrips covered. Oh and also keep the RX (if there was ever a question). It’s nice having one car in the fleet that needs no attention whatsoever.
My mom daily drive a Monte Carlo SS through most of the 80’s and a Camaro through most of the 90’s, plus she held onto my father’s Barracuda almost a decade after he passed. Parenthood doesn’t have to mean the end of fun; it does mean fun will be less convenient.
But since I personally am still living the “David in Michigan” lifestyle, single and more cars than I have time for (a mere five, though), feel free to ignore my advice.
Maybe an old astrovan with shag carpeting and a VCR/CRT/nintendo set up. Wasn’t it the old site that talked about how some vans made for good driveway wrenching, because you could just park it and access important stuff from the inside?
Family friendly insofar as they fit inside. Not family friendly insofar as basically any collision will kill them.
Or kill you. Which all of a sudden is more important when someone else is depending on you coming home with a paycheck.
There are plenty of fun cars out there with 4 doors, reasonably sized back seats, and modern safety equipment!
Changing the style or shape that your fun comes in doesn’t mean it has to stop!
I agree with Jason’s last editors note and just want to add as long as the hobby, here being the vehicles, isn’t getting in the way of your relationship with your family (be it emotionally and financially) in a negative way you shouldn’t go into this looking like you need to get rid of all your vehicles. As Jason said why not involve your child in your hobbies they may end up loving them just like you do. I wish I had done more car work with my dad when I was younger but did not get into working on cars with him until I was in college.
Also one thing I hated hearing as a kid growing up was what my parents had to give up to take care of my brother and I. Like my dad’s 67 firebird he had to sell after my brother was born.
Also quick edit I rode around in my uncle’s 1932 Packard’s rumble seat as a child and that was one of the best things of my child hood that wasn’t up to late 90s safety standards but I am still alive today.
I agree with Jason’s editor note. You can still have fun and do things you love and have crazy, impractical cars.
You can just rotate the Lexus in for whoever has the kid. As long as E(NHRN) is fine driving at least one of your other vehicles, just trade vehicles as needed.
My wife and I just had twins, and we are doing find using her SUV as the ‘family’ car, and I’ve got my truck and C3 Corvette for work and fun.
Once they’re out of the rear facing infant seats, the truck will work just fine, and once they’re older, the Corvette will be a blast (around town)
If you’ve got a safe and sensible Lexus for family runs right now, I don’t think you need to stress about the rest of the fleet just yet, unless you need to free up the cash.
If the baby seat works in the I3S , then it can be ‘secondary’ so neither of y’all feel trapped to one vehicle.
It’s like you’re missing the obvious choice- sell everything and start over with an entirely new round of terrible decisions!