The Memories That Old Bad Cars Can Dredge Up: COTD

One of the best parts about being a car enthusiast is seeing how cars impact people. Cars create memories, and sometimes, in just the right circumstances, cars bring back old memories.

Jason wrote about how embarrassing the Buick Road Hawk was, and in the comments was a story that’ll have you chuckling. I have no idea if Canopysaurus is telling a real story here, but it’s still great:

My last year of college, a fairly obnoxious new student showed up at the dorm driving a Road Hawk. He insisted on parking in the access road behind the dorm right below our fifth floor rooms late at night and blasting disco music while he lazed in a lawn chair getting hammered on Miller High Life. So, so many people enjoyed these “concerts.” You could tell from all the screaming and food stuffs being thrown down as offerings. It all came to an end after a month when, mysteriously, a weighty, three-seat couch constructed from butcher block and burlap plunged from the heavens directly onto the hood of the Road Hawk. Road Kill. You’d imagine that my roommates and I might have heard something being as it all occurred directly below our windows, but every one of us was studying at the library that night, as we told the campus police. In fact, no one in the eight-story dorm whose windows overlooked the scene saw or heard anything. Apparently, disco sucks so bad it Hoovered a couch from the basement lounge, up several flights (the exact number isn’t important) and out of a window to land a fatal blow to the bad boy’s Buick. Allegedly. I’m pretty sure the last time I ever saw a Road Hawk was on the back of a wrecker.

Brian wrote about how a guy in a rented Chrysler Pacifica ran a lap time of under two minutes at the Atlanta Motorsports Park. The awesome Anthony Magagnoli gives more context:

Congrats on your LAP RECORD, Gino!
I was one of the engineers he talked with. I was the Vehicle Dynamics Performance Engineer for Pacifica from 2015-18. I am really pleased with how the car came out, from a ride, handling, and steering perspective. It goes to show that you don’t need a supercar to just have a good-driving car and there’s no excuse for any type of car to drive terribly. The highest performance variant, though, is that on the 18″ Michelin tire. That was the known performance tire of the lineup, and Car and Driver pulled 0.87g!
For the record, I TRIED to make a real S model, but couldn’t get the support around it.

Source for skidpad claim.

I wrote about the time when Consumer Reports heavily disagreed with the Dodge Omni being awarded Car Of The Year by Motor Trend. The responses were hilarious. V10omous:

Motor Trend Car of the Year going to an unworthy winner?

Knock me over with a feather.

Citrus:

You mean the Dodge Aspen wasn’t the finest car of 1976?

Michael Beranek will make you say “aww”:

Back in high school, a buddy of mine had an Omnirizon and we double-dated for a Homecoming Dance. The interior was pretty swank for such a cheap car, and the seats were downright fantastic.
Forty years later, she’s still my date.

Also, somehow I haven’t heard “Omnirizon” before, and now I can’t get enough of it. Have a great evening, everyone!

Top graphic: GM