Home » The Time We Created A Fake ‘Editorial Board’ To Try To Save Jalopnik

The Time We Created A Fake ‘Editorial Board’ To Try To Save Jalopnik

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If you’d like to read this weird story about how Jason, Andrew Collins and I tried to “save” the spirit of Jalopnik via a fake “Editorial Board,” please consider becoming an Autopian member. Thank you!

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BenCars
Member
BenCars
1 month ago

I signed up as a member just to read this.

Even if was just Cloth (because I am a cheap ass), it was worth it.

Jb996
Member
Jb996
1 month ago
Reply to  BenCars

Welcome!

QuantumRust
Member
QuantumRust
1 month ago
Reply to  BenCars

Every penny counts when it comes to keeping good media alive. Welcome to the club!

Tim R
Member
Tim R
1 month ago

Though I do sort of wonder what it would have been like if we did end up with some schmuck we could really push around.

Wonder if Matt wants to weigh in here 🙂

Rory Carroll
Member
Rory Carroll
1 month ago

You sold it pretty well, I got the impression that the board was at least a few months old.

sentinelTk
Member
sentinelTk
1 month ago

My company has gone through multiple reorgs over the last year, and I, as a result, have had too many bosses to mention.

I may or may not have adjusted my ‘role’ when meeting new bosses to take on things I wanted or drop things I didn’t.

“Oh, you want to know about _________. I have no idea who is spearheading __________.”

*Deletes _______ tab in OneNote*

Also, Yay! First comment as a member!

Lotsofchops
Member
Lotsofchops
1 month ago

Jeez Torch, it’s like you forgot how the rest of Huddsucker Proxy went! /s
Great story; I still have Jalopnik bookmarked out of nostalgia and every time I check in, I nope out almost immediately. There are still good stories yes, some very passionate people, but the slop around it is too much.

Balloondoggle
Member
Balloondoggle
1 month ago

Though I do sort of wonder what it would have been like if we did end up with some schmuck we could really push around.

I think we would have had The Autopian that much sooner. You could have converted Jalopnik and just taken over.

Phuzz
Member
Phuzz
1 month ago

I’d like to know Rory’s reaction when he found out that you’d invented the Editorial Board. Or is this article the first time he’s going to find out? 🙂

BoneBrothOutback
Member
BoneBrothOutback
1 month ago
Reply to  Phuzz

Seconded

Rory Carroll
Member
Rory Carroll
1 month ago

I knew about the editorial board, didn’t know it was made up right before I got there. But ultimately, it was really good to have those guys to lean on. Jalopnik was entirely different than I’d imagined it would be and they had a great feel for how it worked obviously.

Shop-Teacher
Member
Shop-Teacher
1 month ago

Thirded

Jb996
Member
Jb996
1 month ago
Reply to  Shop-Teacher

Fourthed

Steven M
Steven M
1 month ago

I promise to become a member as soon as you promise to add metric measurements after any usage of a length, width, volume, etc.

I have no f-ing reference point for how large a 55cu ft trunk and i don’t want to be googling things that take me away from reading the article.

Shouldn’t be too hard to add the alternate measure in brackets by default and make everyone happy. I’m sure you have analytics that show where your audience is from and sure as heck a decent percentage don’t know off hand whether a 177 inch long car is long or short without doing the maths or a lookup.

Ball is in your court!

QuantumRust
Member
QuantumRust
1 month ago
Reply to  Steven M

Most of us in the states don’t know how big a 55cuft trunk is either

Donald Petersen
Member
Donald Petersen
1 month ago
Reply to  QuantumRust

I think that’s at least a few too many cufts.

QuantumRust
Member
QuantumRust
1 month ago

For all I know, it’s not enough

Tbird
Member
Tbird
1 month ago

I’m assuming Miss Mercedes was the hire, an honestly inspired choice. The timeframe matches and I doubt others may have taken the risk. I was relieved to see her name on your masthead after the first month or so.

Last edited 1 month ago by Tbird
I_drive_a_truck
Member
I_drive_a_truck
1 month ago

Please make us a T-shirt.
“Autopian Editorial Board Member”

MATTinMKE
Member
MATTinMKE
1 month ago

Please make us any T-shirt. Last time I checked the merch store was sad. Looking right now I can’t even find the link.

Last Pants
Member
Last Pants
1 month ago

Well you did what you could I suppose. Still if jalopnil (typo but I think it works actually?) was half as crappy you might still be stuck there. As it was you weren’t losing a lot by jumping ship.

Tbird
Member
Tbird
1 month ago
Reply to  Last Pants

Been there…have held on to at least one job way longer than I should have for security, etc… They honestly did me a favor by laying me off. Forced me to make a move for the better.

Jimmy7
Member
Jimmy7
1 month ago

I’ve been around so long that I’ve eaten the Jalopnik Burrito at that place across from Warner Bros. I still go there for NP/ND but that’s about it. I miss the old days but I’m sure glad that we can come here.

Scott
Member
Scott
1 month ago
Reply to  Jimmy7

I have been driving past that place for the better part of three decades. I’ve never stopped in. I had no idea there was a Jalopnik burrito. Why was that the case?

Jimmy7
Member
Jimmy7
1 month ago
Reply to  Scott

I got the idea that the offices were nearby in a very early incarnation. It was a little place with like 3 tables inside and one outside, where Pass meets Olive/Barham.

Scott
Member
Scott
1 month ago
Reply to  Jimmy7

Yes, that’s the place I mean… I just assumed it was a place where WB employees went when their cars were on the fritz. 😉

Donald Petersen
Member
Donald Petersen
1 month ago
Reply to  Scott

For a fleeting moment I thought Jimmy was referencing the old Taco Bell where the Dog Haus is now, the one with all the kid headshots on the walls. But I never saw a Jalopnik burrito there. (I used Gate 4 a lot more than Gate 2.)

1978fiatspyderfan
1978fiatspyderfan
1 month ago

It was a good thing you did. Otherwise if you old guard left it probably would have been to different sites and little control and we would never have gotten Autopian.

Tbird
Member
Tbird
1 month ago

I started reading regularly just prior to this, the change in the old lighting site was abrupt and jarring. Keep up the good fight.

Crank Shaft
Member
Crank Shaft
1 month ago

Jalopnik now equals MFA junk. Eeewwww.

Gurpgork
Gurpgork
1 month ago

What’s Andrew P. Collins up to these days?
He was a fun writer back in the olden days.

Rad Barchetta
Member
Rad Barchetta
1 month ago
Reply to  Gurpgork

He succeeded Patrick George as EIC of The Drive, sort of ironically.

Shop-Teacher
Member
Shop-Teacher
1 month ago
Reply to  Gurpgork

I too always enjoyed Andrew Pterodactyl Collins’ work.

MustangIIMatt
MustangIIMatt
1 month ago

David, I’d become a member, but I worked at Chrysler dealerships on vehicles you designed for too long, and can’t afford it.

I’m sure the story was epic.

Mr E
Member
Mr E
1 month ago

I went over to Jalopnik just now to take a look around.

Oh. Yeah. That’s why I don’t go there anymore. Tis a right mess.

Ishkabibbel
Member
Ishkabibbel
1 month ago
Reply to  Mr E

“Right mess” is exceedingly polite – I can’t even load the site on mobile without an adblocker. Straight up doesn’t work. And don’t get me started on the constant Musk / Cybertruck rage baiting.

Mr E
Member
Mr E
1 month ago
Reply to  Ishkabibbel

I guess I was raised to be diplomatic. 🙂

But you’re right. It fucking sucks.

LBA Oak
Member
LBA Oak
1 month ago

I ended up keeping the old site in my rss feed (yes i still use rss) for way too long. I ended up deleting it and all of the old network because my phone heated up and they pushed so many adds I couldn’t read any of the articles without it crashing.

I really love reading the autopian and the community here. Good job “editorial board”

Dave
Member
Dave
1 month ago
Reply to  LBA Oak

RSS rocks. I still use it. I still annoy website owners who don’t provide it (still looking at you Cars & Bids!)

10001010
Member
10001010
1 month ago
Reply to  LBA Oak

It shows up in my Google News feed and from time to time has some interesting headlines so I click on it but yeah, every damn time so many ads pop up that I can’t read the article and multiple times it’s crashed my browser. I miss what we had at Jalopnik but those days are just gone now.

Benjamin S Lindstrom
Member
Benjamin S Lindstrom
1 month ago
Reply to  LBA Oak

Yeah Jalopnik is completely unusable and has been for years. I gladly pay a subscription here to keep Torch, Tracy, and co. employed, writing weird automotive stuff, and putting it on a website that is actually functional with a comments section that works and no obtrusive ads.

Nlpnt
Member
Nlpnt
1 month ago

Private equity was really ill-suited to go into new media; the low entry barriers and the fact nobody had a noncompete meant they were buying brands at their peak with little to no control of their enshittification rate.

I’m sure they’d have been aghast to learn of the rectally produced Editorial Board but I’m equally sure that between it and landing Rory instead of someone from another industry, they had another year or two of quality content they wouldn’t have gotten if you guys had been pushed out immediately.

CTSVmkeLS6
CTSVmkeLS6
1 month ago

Ketchup chip munchies kicking in hard after after each having an edible.

Phyrkrakr
Member
Phyrkrakr
1 month ago

The Editorial Board (not its real name)

Zeppelopod
Zeppelopod
1 month ago
Reply to  Phyrkrakr

Dr. Edward Board, Esq., JD, PhD

DialMforMiata
Member
DialMforMiata
1 month ago

I was mostly traveling around the world fixing junkers”

Also known as the Spark Plug Gap Year.

Taargus Taargus
Member
Taargus Taargus
1 month ago

Long live the Fake Editorial Board (F.E.B.)!

Beachbumberry
Member
Beachbumberry
1 month ago

I was always curious about how those last few years went down behind the scenes. Makes me sad that site spiraled but I’m glad that yall made it out with your senses of humor intact.

IRegertNothing, Esq.
Member
IRegertNothing, Esq.
1 month ago

Locations and venues change, but if you have the right people in charge you can keep a community together. I’m so glad you guys made this site. Seeing Jalopnik’s decline was sad, but I still have a home for my car nerdiness.

Jack Trade
Member
Jack Trade
1 month ago

Well put. I was on Jalopnik from the Murilee Martin days, through the rise of Torch and the Tracy chronicles, and thought it would always be the best car place on the web. I stuck around mostly for Tom McParland’s occasional pieces but stopped posting, and then finally stopped visiting. Fortunately, I’d heard of a new site coming soon, and well, it’s been even better than I could have hoped for.

Ranwhenparked
Member
Ranwhenparked
1 month ago
Reply to  Jack Trade

Always thought it was a shame that Murilee and Torch never overlapped anywhere, because it sort of seems like they’d get along.

Now, he’s the only reason I still check in at the Truth About Cars, to see what he’s turned up lately in some Coloradan junkyard

Ford_Timelord
Ford_Timelord
1 month ago
Reply to  Ranwhenparked

Have we ever seen them in the same room together? Murille (that saucy minx) was always sporting the beard disguise…. Just saying

HREV Park
Member
HREV Park
1 month ago
Reply to  Ranwhenparked

Didn’t he write a piece for the Autopian not long ago?

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