One of the perks of this job is that we get invited to a lot of events. For practical reasons, we cannot attend everything we’re invited to all the time. One of our favorite PR professionals invited us to a tasting of 5 Hour Energy in Manhattan, and it was such an intriguing proposition that I really wanted to send someone.
I don’t drink a lot of caffeine if I can avoid it, mostly because it makes me feel terrible. I’ve long wanted to send a member to a press launch, so this seemed like a good test run. Certainly, there’d be some member in New York up for the challenge.
BTW, here was the invite:
Oh, that looks good. There are two kinds of drinks I like: straight rye whiskey in a tumbler or the frutiest, brightest concoction you can imagine. One of my all-time favorite cocktails is the eponymous Commodore from The Commodore in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, which is basically a very strong Piña Colada with an amaretto float.
Honestly, looking at this makes me wish they made a non-caffeinated 5-Hour Energy, although at that point, I’d just be drinking juice (I’m a man of the ’90s, I want to be refreshed naturally, calmly).
I posted the invite to the discord server to see if anyone was interested in going to the event on short notice, and was pleased to see that members Matt G and Cristiana were down.

What was the mission? Just go, cover the event, and have a good time. As I said, I eventually want to send a member to a car launch (btw, you can become a member here). Without further ado, here are Matt G and Cristiana’s writeups and photos.
The Autopian Asked Me To Taste Test 5 Hour Energy Drinks – A Scene Report

It’s 2:30 PM on a Wednesday, and I’m on a PATH train under the Hudson River. Instead of doing my real job, writing the software for a green-colored car auction website you might know, I’m on my way to a 5-hour Energy press launch in Manhattan. Despite drinking copious amounts of coffee at some points in my life, I’ve never consumed any energy drinks. I think that makes me either the best or the worst person to send to a 5-hour Energy event, and I’m excited to find out which.

I arrive at the private event space at Pebble Bar in Midtown and meet up with the PR rep, Steve, and the other Autopian member here, Cristiana. They’re raffling off a few watches from their partner brand Cobalt to attendees. Do we have to send the watch to Matt Hardigree if we win?
[Ed note: You can keep anything you get on a junket if you’re not me, since we just send that stuff to members anyway! – MH]
In celebration of Dry January, they’ve had the Beverage Director at Pebble Bar, Tim Sweeney, create mocktails that incorporate the new 5-hour Energy flavors. I am not participating in Dry January, and when I first read the invitation, I thought it said “cocktails,” so I am a little disappointed there’s no alcohol involved.

I get my first drink, the Strawberry Rainbow Lemonade, incorporating the Fruity Rainbow flavor 5-hour Energy. It is extremely sour, and heavy on the strawberry. I taste none of the off-flavors that I would expect from an energy drink (not that I would know). I’m told there’s 3/4 of an ounce of 5-hour Energy in each drink, which is about 1/3 of the 2-ounce bottle. I am not planning to completely finish any of the drinks.
I’m enjoying watching the mechanics of the event take place around me. A still photographer, videographer, and sound guy with a boom microphone ambush the attendees and the bartender to get B-roll footage. Cristiana and I pose for a photo while clinking our glasses.

My second drink is the Cotton Candy Spritz, made with Cotton Candy 5-hour Energy and raspberry non-alcoholic sparkling wine. The Raspberry flavor overpowers everything else, but it’s quite pleasant! Cristiana decides to taste the 5-hour Energy straight. She is not a fan.
The founder and CEO of 5-hour Energy, Manoj Bhargava is here. Steve tells us that this is a big deal, as he rarely leaves the Detroit area, where he lives and where 5-hour Energy is headquartered. He’s doing interviews with the real reporters here, and I don’t want to interrupt that.
Another attendee asks who we are and what outlet we’re with. We attempt to explain.
“We’re with The Autopian, it’s a car website. We’re friends of the Publisher, Matt”
“Oh, he’s here?”
“No, he sent us in his place”
“Oh, as his proxy!”
“Yeah. We’ve never met him.”
“…you’ve never met him.”
“Yeah…”She extracts herself from the conversation.

Time for my third drink, the Confetti Cake Break. Birthday Cake 5-Hour Energy, coconut cream, and assorted fruit juices, topped with sprinkles and a maraschino cherry. This is definitely the best drink (the other bartender working the event, Dante Colicchio, agrees), well balanced between the coconut and pineapple flavors. Still no taste of the energy drink.
I eavesdrop on Steve and another reporter. “Our new slogan is ’17 flavors of tasty caffeine.'” I think he’s joking at first, but he’s not. “We’re switching to flavor,” he says.
One hour in, having sipped on my three drinks, I can feel the caffeine making my heart beat faster in my chest. All is still well, though.
We watch Sweeney (that’s how Steve refers to him, “Sweeney, can you make a drink?”) teach a reporter from Parade Magazine how to make the Strawberry Rainbow Lemonade. She requests the Cotton Candy Spritz, but Sweeney says it’s boring to make. “It’s not the most stimulating,” he says. It has 5-hour Energy in it, of course it’s stimulating.

In the end, we don’t win the watch raffle. We get gift bags containing six 5-hour Energys, a branded mini-Stanley tumbler, and a branded mini-beer-coozie, each of which would perfectly fit one shot of the drink. On the train home, I start to get a headache. – Matt Goldman
Thank you, Matt, for taking the bullet for me! Please enjoy the mini-beer coozie. For a different view of the event, we’ve got Cristiana, who has experience with energy drinks. [Ed note: and Kia Stingers! – PV]
My Take On The 5-Hour Energy Drink Experience

Right next to 30 Rock, where Jack Donaghy plied his wares, was the Pebble NYC bar, where at he top floor was the candy-forward 5-Hour Energy tasting room.

Once I got there, I explained to several people why I was there. They were pretty confused as to why someone barely associated with the premier car site on the internet was there. But there I was.
At the event, they were focusing on their three new flavors: Birthday Cake, Fruity Rainbow, and Cotton Candy. The flavors were each used in a mocktail specially crafted to match with the candy flavors.

The bar was decked out in glass jars filled with various sweets. Cotton candy, sprinkles, gummy bears, and Runts. For some reason, I really enjoy Runts, especially the hated banana flavors. So I was disappointed that they were not used for anything.
The drinks were crafted with great ingredients such as ginger syrup, strawberry puree, and coconut pineapple juice. Plus, two were made with a non alcoholic spirit, ‘Seedip.’ Two different varieties were used; one is styled as a citrus-forward gin, and the other is more like a traditional gin. Neither contains juniper, so they aren’t as herbal as a traditional gin. Regardless,
both did add a gin-styled component to their drinks.

The first drink I tried was the one I was most excited about, the ‘Confetti Cake Break’ featuring the ‘Birthday Cake’ 5 Hour Energy. Once the drink was made, I got a creamy white beverage bedecked with sprinkles and a cherry. Once tasting it, I got citrus with a bit of coconut, and a hint of gin-like spice, with no cake to be found. Seeing the coconut in the ingredients made me think of coquito (look it up, it’s delicious). But in the end, it was kind of a let down.

Next, I tried the ‘Strawberry Rainbow Lemonade.’ Tasting this was also very citrusy, with a hint of strawberry. It contained the ‘Fruity Rainbow’ energy shot, and I have no idea what a fruity rainbow tastes like, but I didn’t feel that with this mocktail.

Finally, I tried the ‘Cotton Candy Spritz.’ Cotton candy is one of my favorite flavors, but like the others, I couldn’t taste its namesake ingredient. Again, I mostly tasted citrus, that added with the non-alcoholic sparkling wine made it taste like a simple mimosa.
What was baffling was that I watched the bartender make the drinks, and they were perfectly made, even the ice was quality. Maybe my tastebuds were off today.
After the drinks, I tried sampling all three 5-Hour Energy on their own. I am quite familiar with how they taste, having drunk many during my clubbing days. All three had a chemical taste that hid any of their flavors. I understand they are made to be downed as a shot, not sipped like a fine
whiskey. So, as an energy shot, it was exactly as expected.This was a pretty standard press event, but the most interesting thing I learned was about the founder and CEO of 5-Hour Energy, the billionaire Manoj Bhargava, who was in attendance. He is not the typical billionaire who hoards their money; he gives away a significant amount to
philanthropic causes, including clean water access, education, especially for rural Indian women, and energy access for the poor.Knowing about the CEO greatly uplifted the zero feelings I had about the company. Quite often, you have to close your eyes about the higher-ups in a company, especially if you are purchasing their product. Not with this company. The world can be quite dark, and knowing there are people out there like Manoj makes the world a tiny bit brighter. – Cristiana.
A huge thanks to both Matt and Cristiana for taking the time to file these reports. I think we should do this again. What do you think?











This was a super fun read, and you can tell they had so much fun and put good thought into sharing the experience. DEFINITELY do this again!
The Commodore is solid. Food there is excellent too.
5 Hour Energy is something I reserve for situations in which I’m expected to party, but am far too old and tired to keep up naturally. Like a bachelor party for someone 8 years younger than you are. Those things kept me alive in Nashville. If I drink them under normal circumstances, they make me panic lol.
This was awesome. Matt’s writeup was as hilarious as Cristiana’s was sweet and sincere. Great feature, keep doing this until pr folks catch wise. Or even better, keep doing it even after they catch wise.
I gotta get back in discord, I’ma kick myself if I miss out on something like this in the future.
Yes! Do again!
I picture the bartender carefully adding 5-Hour Energy by the milliliter with an eyedropper to get to the exact point where there’s enough in the drink to please the CEO but you still can’t taste it.
They did dose it out with their jigger lol
Love seeing the different takes! Def do more of this when possible.
How does one join this Discord dealie?
https://discord.gg/pevUykV3t6
Fantastic writing both of you! The different perspectives was a nice twist.
This was a really entertaining read, even though I hate 5-hour energy.
I have ‘used’ 5-hour energy a few times in my life. I say used because it has a very specific job – keep me awake on super long drives, usually once I cross over the 10 hour mark. 1 works very well, but leaves me shaky and a little nauseous, 2 leaves me feeling like I’ve been hit by a truck.
I think it’s so funny that they are branching out into new flavors, my experience has always been choke it down as fast as possible, and rinse out the taste with something else.
Matt, this was a very good idea, keep The Autopian different.
Both write-ups were great! Even better is the entire premise, so please keep doing this!
Oh we (as a collective) are going to have far too much fun at these goofy events. I second the idea that we should just take on titles and absolutely confuse the living hell out of whoever shows up from Newsweek or the ghost ship of Conde Nasty.
I didn’t get everyone’s details, but I know the Editor-in-Chief of Men’s Journal was also there
Oh,
King“Editor in Chief”, eh, very nice.And how d’you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers! By hanging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society.
The Autopian field reporters however are an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week…but all the decisions of that officer have to be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting …by a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs,… …but by a two-thirds majority in the case of more major affairs.
I wish I had that speech when I was there. It was fun confusing everyone
I definitely have been part of such a thing, well, more crypto-anarchist, and this is too true. Except that nothing ever actually gets decided, more major affairs are of the “is Alex living in the common space and do we make them leave?”, and you have to budget extra time to fix whatever you want to use because everything is broken, always.
Well, I was just quoting Monty Python, so you’ll have to take up the effectiveness of such a system with their Holy Grail peasants. 🙂
Sounds tough though.
Great write-ups!
Hey Matt, it seems I don’t have access to the Member area of Discord. How do I go about changing that?
Shoot me a DM on Discord?
Done and done and done.
I’m welcoming myself as the newest and worst guest writer of The Autopian
You did great! I’m proud to be published alongside you.
So did you! I had a really good time !
I agree! Your write up was the more interesting, with more detail, and the ending about the CEO was a nice touch! Glad you wrote about this event.
Thanks so much ????
Au contraire. You can be proud.
Thanks !
Bonus points if you introduced yourself to the billionaire CEO with that title.
I accidentally gave up caffeine back in 2000 and after a couple months realized I was sleeping better so I haven’t had any since. I can imagine what 3 shots of energy drink would do to me at this point.
For future members attending events.
You are not just some person who hasn’t met Matt. Invent a title. Why not?
Here, they were “senior writers for the the Lifestyle Section of the New York affiliate of the Autopian.”
“Greater New Jersey Area Bureau Chief”, please
Then I’ll be the Lawn Guyland ambassador
At the very least “assistant to the regional manager”
Is Curmudgeon-in-Chief taken?
That would be Adrian Clarke.
Used to drink way to much of that kinda stuff… There were a few of us that would hang around the house until 10-10:30 on a Friday or Saturday night then jump in the cars and head up into the hills and canyons to play around on the fun roads until 2-3:00 in the am. This was a pretty much weekly deal, and almost every trip involve a stop for a redbull/monster/lost/bawls/rockstar/5hr at some point. That’s ancient history, pretty much never touch them anymore. Pretty much. I do still get the occasional hankering for a redbull, especially on a road trip.
I used to live off those when I ran logistics for a Target store. Had to be at work at 3:30am. I used every legal stimulant I could find.
Yes, you should do it again, but with real alcohol this time.
I have the samples from the gift bag that I can do anything with (certainly won’t be drinking them straight), so post your recipe suggestions here
It’s just below this comment thread. Username checks out. See Gudendrunk.
That’s a great idea. I have all the flavors and a fully stocked bar.
now you have to do a real-world taste test with those and put them in four loko’s
Upon arrival to Vegas I used to buy a 5 hour energy and pour it into a beer. Homemade loko.
I love that you did this… and im in the nyc area… guess im going to have to be more active in the discord. Also, I am down for a car launch.
Does that mean you’re a girl drink drunk?
I know a guy that’s 6’3″, and looks like your most stereotypical tattooed army vet ever.
In every bar, his instructions are “Bring me the fruitiest, girliest drink you have.”
It’s great. And the last time he made this request, he frowned and told the waitress “it’s not really that girly.”
I think everybody’s missing the Kids in the Hall reference.
I could go for a Squashed Strawberry Alley Cat
I’d love to be involved in something similar.
It is kind of refreshing to hear that a CEO is a decent human being instead of a steaming sack of schijt spouting hate on social media.
He was there, but I didn’t get to interact with him. But from what I saw he seemed to be a good guy. He certainly dudnt hold himself like you think a billionaire would. At first I thought he was a member of the press
A few weeks after I left my last employer I found out that the billionaire heirs (at least two siblings named) were actively involved in some files that were mandated by federal law to be released in December. Talk about leaving a major yuck but also relief to no longer be associated with them.
I think I used to work for the same company… Or maybe it was another set of morally repugnant billionaire brothers.
Like most people, he is complicated. If you look him up on Wikipedia, you’ll see he’s had some issues.
Nice write up from both!
Don’t do it. Those things are bad for you…you’re gonna die.
I’m still alive!
We’re all gonna die
I died theee times since the tasting. I got better
Or as a friend i had i highschool used to say:
Life is a deadly disease without a cure!
So you should live life acordingly
Hello, Matt G here. This was a lot of fun, thanks for the invite, Matt!