I’m sure you will be unsurprised to learn that I am not an aerodynamicist or a planeologist, nor would I even call myself an airplane buff, though I do seem to be able to identify an awful lot of airplanes and know all kinds of trivia about them. And yes, I’m one of those guys who thinks he can land a 747 should the pilots become incapacitated. I know what the stick, yoke, and pedals do – how hard can it be?
Most of my plane fandom is in the form of liking cool-looking planes, with a special affection for fighters of the WWII era through the early jet age, and all things X-planes. Way down on the list are jetliners, which I appreciate as engineering feats, but I’m not in a hurry to make an Airbus my desktop wallpaper.
What I am an expert in is insomnia and dumb ideas, which often go hand in hand as my body cries out for sleep but my brain says “Wait, what about this?” Recently (July 9th, specifically), I was completely unable to sleep, even after a few rounds of repeating “don’t think” like a soldier who really needs some zees (yes, that’s a thing). I had a vision that simply had to be realized, so sometime around midnight …
I assure you, I did not think I had some kind of solid gold social content here, or even good content. My entire thought process was, “I made it, it’s entertainingly dumb, I may as well post it. It’s travel-related, so close enough for The Autopian.” Aaaaand SEND. I drifted off to sleep shortly after, having expurgated the stupidity that would not give me respite until made real.
Hoo boy, the shoved-cockpit 747 took off overnight, no pun intended.
I admit there are practical concerns, yeesh
Despite the absolutely featherweight reasoning for making a shoved-cockpit 747 (“I just wanted to see it”), many were quick to act as if I were lobbying to put the thing into production:
No way, really?
Ken hates fun, Derek enjoys life but is practical, and Aaron is just alive, man.
My dude, I have thoughts without practical knowledge all the time. Ain’t stoppin’ them thoughts.
Hey man, just because I ignored the impact of the forebody hump on the transonic drag of the wing doesn’t mean I don’t respect the impact of the forebody hump on the transonic drag of the wing. You bet your ass I respect the impact of the forebody hump on the transonic drag of the wing. Ask anyone.
Funny stuff Shane and Gaston, but I feel like Jeremiah is proving the whole shoved-cockpit thing can work:
Thank you, Morgan. And Yuri, you can have my computer when you pry it from my COLD DEAD FINGERS. Charlton Heston voice. Which reminds me …
You’ve no doubt noticed (and will see a few more) references to “bullpupping,” which I must assume refers to the gun configuration below, wherein the magazine and “action” are behind the grip and trigger rather than in front of them. There is a plane called the Bull Pup, but its cockpit is quite far forward on the fuselage. So, machine gun it is. I think.
A shout-out to my fans
Thankfully, some reply guys simply wanted to let me know they dug it. My friends, I thank you.
…and ZERO disadvantages, thank you Andrei. Also, what a lovely render, AI or not. More of those to come.
Always nice to meet a guy who’s secure enough to admit he’s not an aeroplanologist.
Zero percent chance a guy going by “Hoff Johnny” isn’t cool AF. And hell yeah dude, “Hell yeah dude.” Thank you, sir.
Yes! Let’s all go check out the Latécoère 631. Such a lovable long-nosed boi. Pilots landed just fine!
Delightful. You know which one looks cooler. Everyone knows.
Looks pretty great to me, Cameron! I see you have the 2+2 variant. Or 20+20, that’s a lot of cockpit.
Nice! Might wanna put the landing gear down though, you’re gonna scratch the paint.
Indeed, Tyler!
As a matter of course, I stop reading anything after a compliment. There’s usually a “but” soon after, and I don’t need that noise.
Something exactly like that, Marnix!
That vintage-style stripe is a nice touch.
Yes, 747 racing should be a thing. Just imagine five jumbos tearing around pylons 200 feet off the deck! Bring earplugs.
I appreciate your helpful ideas
Some nice folks sought to assist with the visibility challenges, which I appreciate. I see no problems here.
Cockpit on top of the tail, perfect. You can see everything.
I mean, triple-check the landing gear, but this is fine.
I mean, triple-check the extra-long landing gear, but this is fine. And I like that this one has a place for The Poors.
“Reminds me of …”
Many, many people wanted to share what my 1930s-lookin’ 747 reminded them of, including this train. I get it.
Also a good comparison:
A LOT of folks went full Naboo:
There’s that bullpup again.
Some real-world airplanes were popular comparisons too:
It’s Gee Bee, Everett, you’re thinking of the Bee Gees. But that’s OK, they dressed up like pilots once, easy mistake.
My heart is warmed by how many people called out the Fireflash from the 1965 Thunderbirds episode “Trapped In The Sky.” It’s one of the greatest Derek Meddings designs ever:
Thank You, and You’re Welcome
Thank you, everyone, for having fun with this silliness. And you’re welcome if you’re enjoying more airplane stuff in your feed. The algorithm never sleeps.
Top graphic image: DepositPhotos.com
With the cockpit on the ass end, you could make the nose transparent so the first class passengers have a view of where they are going.
my first thought when I saw your image was the Blue Flame (1970-1983 land speed record holder) Link
All I can see it Peter Griffin driving his penismobile.
It’s crazy how much better that looks! Love it.
This entire article should be titled “why we don’t let the Intrusive Thoughts win.”
You mean “Why we do let the intrusive thoughts win”?
Peter, unlike you I am an aerodynamicist, with a deep scientific knowledge of air planes.
As such, let me tell you: that’s sick AF.
Congratulations you just created the airplane version of the NC Squat
The problem with the pictures isn’t the location of the cockpit but the lack of front facing windows for the ultra luxury suit in the nose (aka the James Bond villain lair).
While it wouldn’t have been practical when it first came out, the new X-59 supersonic test plan as no front facing windows so it’s not like this would be unique today.
Caudron C460 but with passengers!
FAA mandated that the nose cone on Concorde be redesigned to have retractable windscreen instead of two-window windscreen as found on prototype and test plane.
FAA reasoned that the pilot and first officer must be able to see the runway clearly instead of through “pigeon-holed” windscreen when landing. Grudgingly, the nose cone was redesigned, and the windscreen enlarged and mounted on the moveable frame.
So, moving the cockpit way back to the rear would not pass FAA regulation.
The FAA is starting to allow some experimental aircraft which have cameras instead of forward windows, so they might change the regulations at some point.
IIRC there was a thought given to using video cameras to help land Concorde, but the technology at the time wasn’t up to the task.
(PS, the French prototype that you linked to has a very slightly different nose design to the British prototype, and both were changed for the production version)
That Concorde I linked here is British as denoted by its tag: G-BSST. Here’s the link to the detailed page.
We have 4K cameras and screens now
That’s fine until the power supply is cut off or the glitches in the computer system occur. Of course, the multi-layered reductancy system will kick in. Yet, you never know…
Everything is fly by wire already anyway
How about cameras and monitors
I hate it, I’m only slightly older than the 747 so you’ve screwed with over 50 years of memories. Also the hump exists to allow for a nose door in a cargo version like a Bristol Freighter or Hamilcar glider.
Also looking like a Gee Bee racer is a bad thing. The Gee Bee R1 was a notoriously touchy aircraft that killed several pilots.
Just make a giant passenger spitfire with four big ass jet engines
The successor to the Supermarine Spitfire was the Supermarine Spiteful. The first FAA jet fighter, the Supermarine Attacker, used the same wings as the Spiteful but since the cockpit no longer needed to be behind the engine it was moved up front.
What it looks like me is the type of plane that doesn’t have to land a flying bomb aka cruise missile. Flamingo territory.
I’m also reminded of the Cohen “dictator” movie where he demanded a “pointy cone” on his war head because it looked like his cartoons.
Yep, definite Ohka vibes.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yokosuka_MXY-7_Ohka
I don’t see the problem. Since we’re into sci-fi designs and everyone’s harping on the view out front, the easy solution is to go all the way and install viewscreens in the cockpit like on the U.S.S. Enterprise powered by a bank of redundant camera systems.
Try docking the Enterprise, CV6 or CVN65 from the bridge alone…
Captain, we’re trapped in a time loop!
Try docking the USS Enterprise, CV6 or CVN65 from the bridge alone…
Captain, we’re trapped in a time loop!
3. You will get it in one of the loops.
More content like this please.
Peter I have to say you are a bit of a disappointment here. Writing about airplanes and apparently can’t identify over 25% of them? I am not an airplane expert but 100% of the time I see an airplane I can identify it as an airplane.
Wait, is this what I am missing out on discord?
No it is what you are missing with the messed up site. Don’t worry they will fix it
Once that you get the green light I want to be in the maiden flight.
Look, the designers of the Concorde already solved this riddle with that plane’s articulated nose. Just reconfigure the 747’s entire fuselage forward of the aft wing root so that it tilts downward for landing. Problem solved!
I admit, moving back the cockpit gives the Autopian 747 some steampunk vibes. But thank god airplanes are designed for function (and safety) first, and looks second.
As indicated before, the location of the cockpit in passenger planes is driven by pilot visibility requirements (day, 15 deg down/35 deg up?). I also worry about how the back hump might interfere with the airflow through the rudder/vertical stabilizer – it might require a taller stabilizer to compensate.
I’m the future, perhaps some sort of VR/AR setup for the pilots might make this kind of design feasible, though.
What I see here is a tremendous opportunity to introduce the world to the madness that is inside an Autopian brain.
I like it. Air Force Fun! Too bad Gerry Anderson didn’t dream up anti-lock brakes.
Torch throws out a super-interesting and well-researched article on the Jeepster with no outrageous weirdness while Peter is in Torch mode. What alternative universe have I entered?
I want to see your timecard on how many hours it took to assemble that many screenshots.
Twas quick actually, just scrollin’ and grabbin’ on my phone. Loading them into the CMS, however, took forever (comparatively)
Put it on the stabilizer. A Trijet without the jet.