Attention: Autopian Meetup With David And Torch This Thursday Near Detroit!


How’s your week going? Fine? Just okay? A miserable slog? Well, if it’s not what you’d hoped it would be, boy do I have a solution for you: the Second First Official Informal Autopian Reader Meetup will be taking place this Thursday, in some parking lot in Troy, Michigan at 6:30 pm, and both David and I will be there to listen to you talk about cars, laugh, cry, and express our sincere appreciation that you’re a part of this madness. See? Everything’s gonna be fantastic after all!

I do need to mention that, contrary to other notices you may have seen on the internet or in flyers around town, this meetup will not offer you the chance to “strike Torch or Tracy with a wood plank, tire iron, sack of doorknobs, or other implement of your choice.” I’m not saying we won’t offer such a service at future meetups, but that is, again, not part of this one.

The same goes for other notices you may have seen suggesting that either David or I will be willing to “drink motor oil, new or used,” or “do anything for $7,” because we have not agreed to any of these conditions, even if our own PR department seems to be the source of the misinformation.

What we will be doing is happily interacting with you and scrutinizing any interesting cars you may have brought! Also, what the hell, if you bring paper and a pen, I’ll draw you a car. Maybe my choice, maybe yours. We’ll see.

Chances are David’s Holy Grail manual Jeep ZJ will be there, and possibly the mold-infested Scion xB running on three cylinders I limped up here for some video shoots.

The Autopian Meetup will take place at 6:30 in the friscalating dusklight of the evening, in the parking lot of the Walmart (classy!) at 2001 West Maple Road, Troy, Michigan, 48084.

Also, holy shit, if you’re going to be in the Walmart parking lot anyway, you should take advantage of this incredible deal on vegetable spirals!

Man, is there any kind of spiral better than a veggie spiral? And, no, before you say it, the rumor that these are just pubes from the Jolly Green Giant has been proven to be untrue by several independent sources, so I don’t even know why you’re bringing that up.

Seriously, grow up.

Anyway, I can’t wait to see everybody there! Autopians unite!


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59 Responses

  1. At least the weather will be back to “super nice” – 79 and partly cloudy. And significantly cooler than the forecasted 92 on Friday.

    Much better than the low-50s and rain that is today.

  2. One day’s notice? That’s worse than my sister-in-law attempting to plan a birthday party.
    How am I supposed to get the eccentrics of the Chicago-Kenosha-Racine Chapter corralled that quickly? You know they’re not allowed to cross time zones without notarized documentation.

  3. DAMMIT!! I’ve always wanted to meet dipshits, especially you two. You’re only six hours (or 12, depending on how monkeyf*cked it is south on 294) but I’m afraid you’re gonna ask me to wrench and I simply cannot

  4. I have an extremely related question: how the hell are either of you actually going to make it there, when none of your cars run?!

    No, I am not giving either of you a ride. Getting 50 year old grease and/or mold out of leather is a bitch.

  5. Ford seems to be doing better than your launch here. Can’t believe you didn’t berate them for their words-to-pic ratio because you come here for brief articles. And you didn’t read this one.

    4. “Chances are David’s Holy Grail manual Jeep ZJ will be there, and possibly the mold-infested Scion xB running on three cylinders I limped up here for some video shoots.”

  6. If you ever find yourself 1400 miles farther south in the middle of TX, I’d make sure to show up. I’d try to lure you down here by saying there are a lot of Jeeps, but they are all tarted up off-roaders that have yet to see a dirt road. Boring modern Jeeps.

    1. How many are 2wd? Lol a rolling oxymoron.

      Almost every one, save for Wranglers obviously, in my area are 2wd. And I saw a squatted Wrangler the other day. With those silly low profile tires on gigantic rims sticking 10′ in each direction. Way to completely ruin it, bro.

    2. Yeah, but you also have at least two 5.9 Limiteds in the area that I’ve seen.
      And if you tell me a Jeep that can make 100 foot long elevenses from the factory in 1998 that was so monstrous it required functional hood vents is not a cool Jeep, I swear to god, I will replace every car you own with one of David Tracy’s.

  7. That was another great meetup, and I stayed out way too late for a weeknight. What a great mix of cars that I’ve never seen before in person and the conversation is always so interesting. As DT promised, the rain (mostly) held off. Torch, it was great to meet you too and I hope the group had enough interesting taillights for you. And whoever brought and gave you a taillight to take home was awesome!

  8. Given that Traverse City is only three and a half hours away, I almost came down.

    But, also given that the Greyhound bus I was planning on driving gets 4 miles to the gallon of diesel, I had to weigh the economic benefits of a face-to-face meeting.

    It was close, but alas…

  9. Thanks for the fun meetup, dipshits! I’m not even mad that I hit a pothole on the way home and ruined a tire. Well I’m a little mad, but that’s life.

    I hope the guy with the Lambo wasn’t offended that we crowded around a Roadmaster and Autozam instead. I mean I’ve seen more Lambos in person than kei cars, and that Roadmaster’s multi position tailgate was pretty sweet.

  10. Dang it! Tonight’s our 15th wedding anniversary and we’ve promised each other we’d hit Taco Bell for the return of the Mexican Pizza. But this transplanted Michigan dude could sure use a Coney Island and a Vernors. Have fun.

  11. Fellow Troy resident who drives past the Jeep graveyard on the regular. I’m expecting to be able to drop by.

    No barely-running vehicles but I do drive a GTI, which was seemingly the official reader vehicle of the old place.

  12. Not sure on the distance from here, but according to google maps, it’s about 22hrs flying time each way. maybe I can catch up with DT and Mercedes when they come to OZ, the land down under.

  13. One of these times I am going to bite the bullet and drive up to Troy, but you have to give us a bit more notice. for some reason my wife is not fond of me abandoning her and my child for entire days. Something about lingering PTSD from all the shitboxes I would drive across the country to buy for less than 1k in my wild youth.

  14. You mean I could actually get to ask Torch why he has ignored every single attempt I have ever made to reach out to him? Seriously, I actually wonder if I offended him in some way I can’t even fathom. Alas, Detroit is too far to satisfy my curiosity this weekend.

      1. No need to apologize. I’m sorry I’m such a needy person. However, I did send you a Facebook friend request semi-recently and I would be quite grateful if you accepted so I could periodically annoy you like I do DT. Or run for your life depending on what DT may say about me. 🙂

        You guys are the best and I’m so insanely happy you started this site.

  15. If the two of you ever do this in Cali please post well enough ahead some of us could attend, lots of miles to go pretty much wherever, no doubt people would. I could make jokes, but I love the fact you’re doing this as all. Just getting this website up and running is a real accomplishment, this is extra.

  16. Darn! Maybe if y’all swing around Lake Erie and grace Western NY with your tales of The Taillight That Never Was and battling the remorseless tin worm, I could swing it. We have Walmarts here too! Or if a bit further east you could sample the regional delicacy known as a “plate”.

  17. As much as I would love to meet you two particular “dipshits”, 559 miles is a bit too far to drive each way on a work night. Plus I’m not entirely sure my David Tracy- bait ZJ would make it. =)

  18. Well 1st
    1. How about $8?
    2. Not offering but how about without permission
    3. Problems with the PR Department? Okay Elon
    4. What vehicle between the 2 of your fleets have you found that actually runs that you will be driving?
    Of course all this is meant in good fun. I’m really enjoying this site. You guys have really done an excellent launch. Ford could take lessons from you.

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