Hey y’all! It turns out I won a Volkswagen caption contest at the launch of the 2024 Volkswagen Atlas. The prize? A super fancy camp blanket that’s too nice for me to keep. The good news is, one of the perks of membership (at all levels) is that we’ll randomly send out awesome swag we get from events to members (sign up here!). Also, let’s make this fun.
As detailed in our first ever Junket Report, I hadn’t participated as a journalist in a car launch in like six years and mostly spent my time reacclimatizing myself. When the very nice PR folks announced they’d be having a social media contest I was too preoccupied to enter. Huzzah! Someone else must have entered me, because I won. Here’s the tweet btw:
At the VW Atlas launch and excited to let you know this review will give me a chance to use the term heckblende. pic.twitter.com/R94SZUJXYg
— MattHardigree (@MattHardigree) July 12, 2023
What I’m pretty sure I won is a fancy Rumpl (I think that’s what they said) camp blanket, like this one, but with a cool Volkswagen logo on it. The value is probably over $100 and I generally don’t keep anything I get from automakers worth more than a nominal amount, so I’m going to give it to you (…but I will accept a fancy brand new car with a full tank of gas and a free trip? The first rule of Automotive Journalist Ethics is to not think too much about Automotive Journalist Ethics).
[Editor’s Note: Yeah, Matt, be cool, be cool – JT]
How do you get it? Just be a member and at the end of the day I’ll use a random number generator to randomly select a person based on their internal member # (which is based on when you signed up).
[Editor’s Note: I’m gonna write the random number generator in BASIC on one of my Apple IIs because I trust that pseudo-random number generator more than Google. – JT]
That being said, let’s have a little fun: Come up with the most Volkswagen-sounding name for a new, convertible Volkswagen crossover (a la CrossCabriolet) that will probably never exist. It can be an extremely simple English word (Golf, Rabbit) or a wind (Passat), or a group of people (Touareg). Just make it sound both hilarious and realistic at the same time.
BTW, as mentioned, I’m keeping this post open for non-members so everyone can play. Only a member can win, though (and again, the winner will not be the person with the best response, this is just for funsies). If you want to be up for being randomly chosen, do please sign up and become a member! We are two short of 900 members and Peter made a fun graphic he wants to share on social when we hit that number.
Also, please note that we’re in our summer membership drive so there are a few more posts about membership than usual. Once we hit our goal (1,000 members) or get to the end of summer (Labor Day) we’re going to cool off a bit and go back more to normal programming.
Very NPR of you.
Still no Autopian tote bag though.
You joke, but I would actually love an Autopian tote bag. All the stores near me are BYOBag now.
Hmm…
Do it! I’ve been using these Toyota bags I picked up over the course of several autoshows for years. I’m afraid their nearing the end of their natural lifespan.
I ran out of those and moved onto Hyundai a few years back. Expendable, but keep one or two nice to show the whippersnappers
DO IT
If you ever want free help with ideas and execution of free or paid merch, I have been responsible for corporate gifts before and have figured out some really choice items.
I had a couple of tote bags from the Performance Racing Industry trade show that I used for years. These would sell, especially with the graphic design chops that several staffers here have!
I always keep a tote bag in my cars in case of unplanned shopping trips while I’m out and about so I would be 100% in favor of an Autopian tote bag. Also, my 15 year old Target tote bags are finally starting to fall apart (RIP) so I’m going to need replacements anyway.
I’d take an Autopian tote bag. I could finally stop carrying spare parts around in my pants like a sucker.
Same, I could probably make do with an Autopian five gallon bucket. Sure, store clerks might look at me funny but it could do double duty as a wrenching seat and tool carrier. But then there’s the shipping cost… never mind, I’ll make my own.
…does this mean we get an upcoming audio feature on the Jeep cats?
(Sidenote: NPR actually had a feature on Jeep owners “ducking” each other the other day, which made me chuckle. They know about the ducks! RUN!)
LuftFahrter
Dieselgatefreeair
A retro convertible crossover marketed towards muddy offroading and forest trails:
The VW 1.MoorThing
Funny to see this post about a VW blanket, as my son and I got caught in a giant rainstorm just this week at an outdoor Gary Clark Jr concert, and spent the first hour of the show huddled under a TOYOTA blanket. I entered Toyota’s dumb raffle at a local ski resort last year to get the kid the blanket, because he liked the plaid design. Turns out the vinyl backing is waterproof. Win!
The VW wasserPolo. Underpower for even a water boat.
Here’s a few from the old brain box:
– VolksWaffle
– The CrossBreeze
– The ConvertiBug
– CabrioCrawler
– SciroccsOFF (roader)
– ID.Buzzcut
I am 100% a sucker, and just bought basically a $10 raffle ticket for a blanket.
The ID. Thing! Or maybe the Scout (Type) III.
Those are too fun, it’d probably be the Atlas Cross Air
Die Volks Wagen by Volkswagen
Fahrvergnügen ID
Isn’t it time for ’90s VW retro revival?
The most Volkswagen-sounding name I can think of is Scirabbit Mk3.5 Cabrio GTI.
Pronounced “Sher-Rabbit.”
VW Thing. Since they’re going all retro-futurustic at the moment, just embrace it and name the new one for the old one.
{ googles the Puffy blanket }
GAAAAAASP THEY HAVE A PINK AND PURPLE ONE THAT MATCHES MY PUFFALUMP
(Also, yeah, you guessed right on pricing. Probably going to stick to eating on the 411’s hood. I’m sitting this one out as a sometimes? [dies a lot on the inside] industry schlub, but like, I have a whole Volkswagen for this exact purpose already.)
VW Touaragtop
How about: sol der sonne-cross