Hello, dashing readers! As you may be aware, today is Indigenous Peoples Day in many states, Columbus Day in others, but whatever you’re choosing to pretend to recall and carefully reflect on, it’s a day off. And days off are important, as we need to let our writers brains marinate and re-absorb their creative juices, gels, and, occasionally, custards. So, yes, we’re not going to have the full buffet of stories today, but to let you know we still care, here’s a fascinating concept car named Columbus for you to consider.
Columbus was an Italdesign concept from 1992, and the initial goal of the project was to make a “sailing ship for dry land” because, of course, that’s what everyone was clamoring for. I bet people really wanted more hardtack and salt pork in their diets, too.
The result was something really remarkable, and, even more so, bonkers. Italdesign envisioned Columbus as being something ideal for “the urban scenarios of the United States,” though I think if anything it would have excelled in the non-urban scenarios of the United States, as this thing would make a fantastic long-distance, across-America road trip machine. I mean, look at it:
It’s sort of like a smaller tour bus, in a way; the driver sat centrally up high in the front, oddly removed from the six (expandable to eight) passengers behind. The layout sort of suggests a hired driver as opposed to, say, a parent or something, seeing as how they’re sort of removed from the greater population of the van. But maybe not; there’s actually three seats on the “upper” deck, so the driver isn’t really that alone:
Look at the layout of this thing! That’s a BMW V12 mounted transversely in the middle there, driving all four wheels. The rear wheels are capable of turning as well (up to 15°) a quality it shares with some of the seats, which are Captain’s chairs and capable of turning as well.
As you can see, everything is very early ’90s swanky, and I can imagine that beige carpet getting nice and filthy over less time than you’d likely think.
The exterior design is a little clunky, being a sort of merging of two very ’90s smooth, biomorphic, river-rock-eroded masses, but it sort of works in it own odd way.
It’s a pretty massive beast; it’s no wonder Italdesign was targeting this at the American market. Something this size in Europe would probably require zoning permits and landscaping.
It tends to look oddest in profile, where it feels like a sleek, almost sporty minivan got fused with a sort of fastback, kind of. Or maybe it was a van that was melted and stretched, kind of like those ’70s carnival prize melted and stretched soda bottles.
The front also has the face of a sort of grimacing or leering snake?
I kind of love this ridiculous thing, and while I couldn’t really picture anyone owning one, I could imagine a world where a family that normally had little city cars would rent one of these for a big road trip. In that context, they kind of make sense!
Anyway, I hope there’s lots of you out there with the day off, and I hope it’s fantastic. We’ll be back in full force tomorrow!
The Nina, The Pinta, The Santa Maria, I ll do you in the back while we’re drinkin Sangria.
This makes the Fiat Multipla look normal. Oh wait. Early 90’s. Vividness addled design brain.
That red bicycle is cool. Goggle says it’s Italdesign too https://www.italdesign.it/en/project/blouson/
I’m getting a bit of 747 with the raised cockpit.
Today is a workday.
Monday.
Not a day off.
My dad brought home Car Styling magazines work was throwing out, they had a deep dive on this. I thought this was the coolest thing back in the day…
I like that it essentially has two “shotgun” seats. Of course the center driver’s seat means your port side passenger would have to do the ordering at any fast food places, assuming this thing even fits through a drive thru.
As for practicality, this may be three feet longer than my Toyota Sienna, but it’s still a few feet shorter than a long bed crew cab f-150, and the f150 doesn’t have four wheel steering. That said it is funny that they pitched the concept for urban areas when as Jason points out this really looks like the ultimate road trip rig. Although I don’t even want to think about the mileage you’d get with that v12.
Since nobody else has gone there:
“All my life, I have searched for a car that feels a certain way. Powerful like a gorilla, yet soft and yielding like a Nerf ball. Now, at last, I have found it. Homer, The Car Built for Homer.”
I will bid tree fiddy for this fine piece of automotive history!
Loch Ness monster! I ain’t givin you no three fiddy…
Humpback whale.
Looks like something Luigi Colani would have done
My thoughts exactly. He had all of those cars/trucks with the big heads
This is gorgeous. I want one, but more importantly, I want to get Adrian’s take.
Am I the only one who keeps thinking the back is the front on this?
I didn’t think that, but see where you’re going. Or probably where you’ve been given the end confusion.
Uh, Columbus Day
love to celebrate old world diseases making their way to the new world, heard he was super nice and kind to the native people also
I prefer the Ital Design Bridgestone Blouson in the 2nd to last photo.
Finally – a minivan I could own without feeling like I’d given up on life. That thing is completely bizarre looking, but I like it. And think of the attention you’d get at gas station stops!
Mini?
I’m going with what was in the headline, but it is a pretty maxi mini.
BMW would still sell it as a MINI.
I’ll have you know I just (finally) became a paid subscriber quite recently, in no small part because y’all are the decent sorts who give everyone a day off when they should.
With the criss crossing layers of glass, there’s quite a lot of SSangg Yoongg Rodius in it too. Just too damn much going on!
You’re right, they should make Adrian buy one!
You fools, remember the last time the world let England have the most powerful navy?!
We didn’t let the rest of the world have much say in the matter
When a Rodius and a Multipla love each other very much…
Ha, I’d love to road trip in that!
You call it a double decker – but that’s implies something more like a London or Hong Kong bus.
This is more of a split-level.
And it’s cool AF.
Clearly inspired by Japanese minivans – particularly the Toyota Previa.
This is the Monkey’s Paw output for the prompt “I want a one-off Italdesign car with a BMW V12 mid-engine and sitting in the middle like a McLaren F1”
Yuppies need a conversion van, too.
And yet so far no mention of the huge frunk potential of this! There is space up front, no engine, and an easy to access lid potential. I wonder what is lurking under there?
Steering, Braking, Batteries, Engine cooling system, HVAC and feet.
I think Doug Demuro talked about trying to buy this from Italdesign but they declined.
Gotta do something with the money he saved from all those layoffs!