Home » The Googly Eyes Just Improve Things: Cold Start

The Googly Eyes Just Improve Things: Cold Start

Cs Renault6 Googlyeyemonster
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I think it’s safe to say that there’s many contexts where the addition of googly eyes to something improves it. Like a compressor, or an anvil, or perhaps some plants. I saw this old brochure for a 1977 Renault 6 – a sort of upmarketified Renault 4 – and realized that, in an ideal world, large oversized googly eyes would have been applied to that woman’s fur coat there, transforming it into some sort of possibly friendly gumdrop-shaped hirsute monster riding in the back there. I think it makes for a much more evocative image.

Also, is the word hirsute somehow derived from “hair suit?” Let’s check. Hm. Not exactly, it’s from the Latin word hirsutusmeaning “rough, shaggy, or bristly.” Well, crap.

Vidframe Min Top
Vidframe Min Bottom

Anyway, here’s what the brochure looks like sans eyes, and I think you’ll agree the eyes are a huge improvement:

Cs Renault6 Int

Also, Renault is really going all out showing the features of this car: armrests! Door pulls and crank windows and an ashtray? Is that woman an Empress? A dome light, too? Who is she, a god?

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Cs Renault6 Dash

I kinda like the simple dashboard here, even though Renault is guilty of a bit of false advertising, because once that car reaches a speed of any miles per hour, those glasses are going to slide off that dash like an Olympic ski jumper and will lodge themselves under a seat. It’ll happen pretty much immediately.

Cs Renault6 Front

The Renault 6 also had kind of a stern little face there. I think it’s something about those rectangular headlamps, and their strange aspect ratio; they seem more vertical than horizontal, which is unusual for car headlights. They’re like a 3:4 ratio.

Anyway, it looks a bit miffed at you. What did you say to it?

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Evan Shealy
Evan Shealy
9 months ago

Don’t stop with the coat. Add googly eyes to the headlights and the woman

Bongo Friendee Harvey Park
Bongo Friendee Harvey Park
9 months ago

> there’s many contexts where the addition of googly eyes to something improves it.

There are no contexts where adding googly eyes to something doesn’t improve it.

Col Lingus
Col Lingus
9 months ago

Ok I’ll just say it. The furry thing with the eyes is a spy from FIAT. Looking to understand how Renault builds such great cars. And pondering how to get Miss Panties in a bunch to hand back his cool sunglasses from the dash.

I could say more about the huge hair ball in the back, and how it relates to French self grooming and care, but am trying to be polite until the meds kick in. As the Corsican Brothers said, “it looks like some kind of hairy sea monster.”

Last edited 9 months ago by Col Lingus
Internal Error
Internal Error
9 months ago

This is at a scout camp in CA. I cannot confirm nor deny responsibility.

Trust Doesn't Rust
Trust Doesn't Rust
9 months ago

Look at a picture of Charles de Gaulle and then look at that straight-ahead, stern-faced picture of the Renault 6.

I’d like to think it was Renault’s tribute to le Général. It’s probably not true, but I’d like to think it anyway.

MaximillianMeen
MaximillianMeen
9 months ago

Looks like the Monster from Looney Tunes “Hair-raising Hare”.
https://tenor.com/view/bugs-bunny-monster-orange-run-walls-gif-10708051

Harris K Telemacher
Harris K Telemacher
9 months ago

That’s the first thing I thought of when I saw the googly eyes. Gossamer, the big red hairy monster.

Hoonicus
Hoonicus
9 months ago

” I think it’s something about those rectangular headlamps, and their strange aspect ratio; they seem more vertical than horizontal, which is unusual for car headlights. They’re like a 3:4 ratio.”
Jason is obviously under googly eye induced hypnosis to give the headlamps this scrutiny and not mention the bipolar doppelganger aspect.

UnseenCat
UnseenCat
9 months ago
Reply to  Hoonicus

I traveled in Spain in the mid and late 90s and those headlights were popular on various European vehicles at the time. They were sort of the Euro version of the US large single and smaller dual rectangular sealed-beam headlights — they must have used dual-filament bulbs and different lenses for the single ones (less common) and single-filament bulbs for the dual setups (Which showed up on buses and trucks more often.) They must have been the solution for more modern-looking front end styling when the designers and manufacturers didn’t want to spend the money on model-specific aero headlights.

Canopysaurus
Canopysaurus
9 months ago

According to some sources, the term hairsuit may be a bastardization of hirsute due to poor pronunciation. If so, I blame the English.

Chronometric
Chronometric
9 months ago

This is the French equivalent of the Ford Granada looks like a Mercedes ads.

Third Pedal Girl
Third Pedal Girl
9 months ago

How kind of Renault to include color-matched helmets. Obviously, in the pre-airbag era, there was a broad range of attempts to improve occupant safety and this is quite creative.

What’s that?

That’s her… hair?!

Oh, dear.

The Artist Formerly Known as the Uncouth Sloth
The Artist Formerly Known as the Uncouth Sloth
9 months ago

there was a time when that hair was State of the Art. 1976 me woulda had….issues

Arrest-me Red
Arrest-me Red
9 months ago

I bought a pack of 100 googly eyes on Amazon.

My Wife “Why would you buy 100 googly eyes?”

Me “Why wouldn’t I buy 100 googly eyes?”

Vetatur Fumare
Vetatur Fumare
9 months ago
Reply to  Arrest-me Red

The question is whether you have children… But even if not, experiment with placing them on fruits and vegetables. A halved bell pepper can look fantastic.

Gilbert Wham
Gilbert Wham
9 months ago
Reply to  Arrest-me Red

“To stick on your boobs while you’re asleep, that’s why”

Col Lingus
Col Lingus
9 months ago
Reply to  Gilbert Wham

Just use a magic marker for that. It lasts longer and she stays pissed off longer.
At least that’s what a friend told me.

IRegertNothing, Esq.
IRegertNothing, Esq.
9 months ago

It was very nice of that couple to help the hitchhiking muppet answer Kermit’s call to get the gang back together.

Acrimonious Mofo
Acrimonious Mofo
9 months ago

I’ll just leave this here:

https://metalalbumswithgooglyeyes.tumblr.com/

Bongo Friendee Harvey Park
Bongo Friendee Harvey Park
9 months ago

Crack the Skye is amazing with googly eyes.

Flyingstitch
Flyingstitch
9 months ago

Based on the blur outside the window, I can see why she’s clinging to the assist handle. Klaus is driving the car beyond its limits, or perhaps the brakes have failed on an Alpine road.

Maymar
Maymar
9 months ago
Reply to  Flyingstitch

Am I the only one who thinks it looks like Klaus has driven so hard the interior’s spun sideways and flung the tailgate open?

Flyingstitch
Flyingstitch
9 months ago
Reply to  Maymar

I can’t believe I missed this, but THERE IS NO KLAUS. You can clearly see the empty driver’s seat in the foreground. The plot thickens.

Phantom Pedal Syndrome
Phantom Pedal Syndrome
9 months ago
Reply to  Flyingstitch

I sure hope that fur coat doesn’t fly out, leading to a CHiPs style pile-up.

Last edited 9 months ago by Phantom Pedal Syndrome
Rusty S Trusty
Rusty S Trusty
9 months ago

No, really, I promise it’s upmarket. Look at this photo here with the fur coat in the back. See? Upmarket!

Last edited 9 months ago by Rusty S Trusty
Pupmeow
Pupmeow
9 months ago

Speaking of shit on the dashboard. Lately every other Wrangler I see has little rubber duckies lined up along the dash. What happens when they make a turn? Is the interior of the car just a chaotic stew of flying rubber duckies? Or are they gluing them down?

Ranwhenparked
Ranwhenparked
9 months ago
Reply to  Pupmeow

The ducks are because it’s become a trend over the past 3 years or so for Wrangler owners to put a rubber ducky on other Wranglers they see parked, so people collect the ducks they receive and keep extras in their Jeep so they can give them out themselves

Taargus Taargus
Taargus Taargus
9 months ago
Reply to  Ranwhenparked

Weird cult

TOSSABL
TOSSABL
9 months ago
Reply to  Ranwhenparked

(Searches Amazon for ‘most disturbing duckies’)

Stef Schrader
Stef Schrader
9 months ago
Reply to  Pupmeow

This may be one of the few times I’ve read “ducking” en masse without it being autocorrect at work. Anyway, NPR of all places did a decent and succinct explainer of the phenomenon and its origin: https://www.npr.org/2023/07/18/1188244113/what-the-duck-people-are-leaving-the-rubber-birds-on-jeeps-in-a-new-trend

Last edited 9 months ago by Stef Schrader
Collegiate Autodidact
Collegiate Autodidact
9 months ago

“I think it’s safe to say that there’s many contexts where the addition of googly eyes to something improves it.”
Indubitably! Cf. Everything Everywhere All At Once!

DubblewhopperInDubblejeopardy
DubblewhopperInDubblejeopardy
9 months ago

Well, I can also suggest another place to put the googly eyes. And I am not going to apologize for my gutterbrain. But just imagine going over speedbumps……

Rollin Hand
Rollin Hand
9 months ago

I was going to say put the googleyes over the headlights of the Renault, but…I assume you’re talking about another set of headlights.

IRegertNothing, Esq.
IRegertNothing, Esq.
9 months ago

Is this one of those “low brow” comments I’ve been warned about? You owe me a new monocle!

Austin Vail
Austin Vail
9 months ago

We can lend you a googly eye to replace your monocle.

Arch Duke Maxyenko
Arch Duke Maxyenko
9 months ago

The eyes only make it look more like a Snuffleupagus pelt

Rollin Hand
Rollin Hand
9 months ago

“..and that’s when Gordon told Big Bird that Snuffy wasn’t real. At least, not anymore.”

IRegertNothing, Esq.
IRegertNothing, Esq.
9 months ago

Money was tight, and the lady offered a good price. Elmo did what had to be done.

Austin Vail
Austin Vail
9 months ago

They… Snuffed him :,(

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