I'm a co-founder/Chief Creative Officer of the Autopian, the site you're on right now! I'm here to talk to you about taillights until you cry and beg me to stop, which I absolutely will not. Sorry. Hug? Also, David's friend.
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Current Fleet (running or close enough): 1990 Nissan Pao, 1983 Citroën 2CV, 1989 Ford F-150; (not so running): 2020 Changli, 1977 Dodge Tioga RV, 1973 VW Beetle
After the “adults” parties my parents used to throw when my brother and I were in early grade school, we would roam around the house the next morning and find cans of beer that had a sip (sometimes more) left behind. Well, I got one of them that also contained a cigarette butt. Fortunately, the butt didn’t make it to my stomach.
The flock of Velosters (Velociraptors?) part reminds of a BMW demo ride I attended decades ago in Reno. They had about 30 bikes of various flavors for us to choose from and a lead rider and a sweeper to bring up the rear. The leader took us up to about 100 mph westbound on I-80. I was about half way back in the phalanx astride a (just introduced) K75 and a baby shit brown Nevada Highway Patrol Mustang flew past us with lights and siren going. I immediately thought he was going to pull us all over, but apparently, the patrolman was on his way to something more urgent. I wouldn’t be surprised if at least one rider (not me) had shorts that matched the Mustang.
At the same event, BMW demo’d prototypes of K-series bikes with ABS. Subsequent models were among the first ABS-equipped bikes to make it to production.
Member
Frederick Tanujaya
1 month ago
This man got me holding in laughs in the middle of an Analytical Modelling lecture.
Member
1978fiatspyderfan
1 month ago
Anyone that grew up in the age of smoking in cars and bars has ingested a cigarette or more. It is far better than grabbing the wrong beer at a party and getting chewing tobacco spit. Trust me. Because then you have the whole projectile vomiting which sets off a round of everyone vomiting and soon it’s not a party any longer
Member
JJ
1 month ago
So, this time, decades after the last cigarette I ate, I found myself with yet another Camel in my gut.
Torch would have got a free beer from me and my friends with his cigarette trick in college. It would have definitely beat the guy known as “FIRSTNAME Hey man, can I bum a smoke LASTNAME.” Still remember his name but redacted because the internet. Dude always wanted to bum a smoke, and in 1987 he drove a Porsche 924. Dressed extremely well. At that point my VW Beetle was dead and I’d sold it, so no 924 for me. We were all poor as shit college students, so beer and smokes were luxuries. Buy your own damn smokes. After all, I could spend $5 back then for a cheap 12 pack of beer and a pack of smokes and get change back.
Another guy did the ‘drink from the ashtray can’ bit after a dorm room party once. He opened a beer and set it down then took another drink from the can next to it. Didn’t stay long after that.
Your story reminded me of the time when my college girlfriend had a friend that she had made during her semester abroad in New Zealand come to visit her. The look of shock, horror, and confusion on his face when someone asked if they could “bum” his lighter was priceless.
Member
Trust Doesn't Rust
1 month ago
Jason, how many times have you been roofied at the Scarlet Lighter?
I feel like it’s a lot and I feel like it was very easy to do.
The Lumière Rouge is where the real hardcore patrons go in Torch’s neck of the woods in NC. I’ve seen things there that I don’t dare type in a public forum.
Member
GrandTouringInjection
1 month ago
As a forgotten, impatient, left-handed, late Gen-X middle child, I have had the distinct privilege of ingesting both Diet Cokes filled with discarded cigarettes/ashes along with dip spit-separately but equally disgusting.
It will forever change your habit of just taking a random swig of any drink especially darker colored ones that can hide their contents.
10/10 would not recommend but my torturous older sister and my momma’s boy tattle-tale brother enjoyed my errant ingestions with flagrant and unapologetic laughter.
This reminds me of a late night after a frat party. Me a Marine and a jock were drinking to the point of stupidity. The jock was drinking tequila and was bummed the worm was gone so he caught a moth put it in the tequila, we were never sure who drank the moth. Good times. Now I get an upset stomach if I drink orange juice with too much pulp.
Member
It's Pronounced Porch-ah
1 month ago
After taking a shot at a college party I reached for the closest chaser and it was a can that someone was using as a spitter. Disgusting and luckily a mistake I only made once.
Member
Cheap Bastard
1 month ago
Thanks to baseball there was a time in the late 80’s/early 90’s when my friends believed chewing tobacco was THE cool thing to do. A pair of jeans with a back pocket containing a Skoal can was highly fashionable, almost as much as a rip in the knee had been a few years earlier.
So of course this ment they were constantly spitting the stuff into whatever was around. It didn’t take long before some drunk fool at a party grabbed a can of brew and chugged it only to find used chew. After the first swig he knew, then he blew. Eww!
I soon left for college and when I returned years later my friends had moved onto cigars.
After the “adults” parties my parents used to throw when my brother and I were in early grade school, we would roam around the house the next morning and find cans of beer that had a sip (sometimes more) left behind. Well, I got one of them that also contained a cigarette butt. Fortunately, the butt didn’t make it to my stomach.
The flock of Velosters (Velociraptors?) part reminds of a BMW demo ride I attended decades ago in Reno. They had about 30 bikes of various flavors for us to choose from and a lead rider and a sweeper to bring up the rear. The leader took us up to about 100 mph westbound on I-80. I was about half way back in the phalanx astride a (just introduced) K75 and a baby shit brown Nevada Highway Patrol Mustang flew past us with lights and siren going. I immediately thought he was going to pull us all over, but apparently, the patrolman was on his way to something more urgent. I wouldn’t be surprised if at least one rider (not me) had shorts that matched the Mustang.
At the same event, BMW demo’d prototypes of K-series bikes with ABS. Subsequent models were among the first ABS-equipped bikes to make it to production.
This man got me holding in laughs in the middle of an Analytical Modelling lecture.
Anyone that grew up in the age of smoking in cars and bars has ingested a cigarette or more. It is far better than grabbing the wrong beer at a party and getting chewing tobacco spit. Trust me. Because then you have the whole projectile vomiting which sets off a round of everyone vomiting and soon it’s not a party any longer
So, this time, decades after the last cigarette I ate, I found myself with yet another Camel in my gut.
Give this man a Pulitzer.
I’d have used hump
also, reminds me of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ub_gmBofN90
Torch would have got a free beer from me and my friends with his cigarette trick in college. It would have definitely beat the guy known as “FIRSTNAME Hey man, can I bum a smoke LASTNAME.” Still remember his name but redacted because the internet. Dude always wanted to bum a smoke, and in 1987 he drove a Porsche 924. Dressed extremely well. At that point my VW Beetle was dead and I’d sold it, so no 924 for me. We were all poor as shit college students, so beer and smokes were luxuries. Buy your own damn smokes. After all, I could spend $5 back then for a cheap 12 pack of beer and a pack of smokes and get change back.
Another guy did the ‘drink from the ashtray can’ bit after a dorm room party once. He opened a beer and set it down then took another drink from the can next to it. Didn’t stay long after that.
Your story reminded me of the time when my college girlfriend had a friend that she had made during her semester abroad in New Zealand come to visit her. The look of shock, horror, and confusion on his face when someone asked if they could “bum” his lighter was priceless.
Jason, how many times have you been roofied at the Scarlet Lighter?
I feel like it’s a lot and I feel like it was very easy to do.
The Lumière Rouge is where the real hardcore patrons go in Torch’s neck of the woods in NC. I’ve seen things there that I don’t dare type in a public forum.
As a forgotten, impatient, left-handed, late Gen-X middle child, I have had the distinct privilege of ingesting both Diet Cokes filled with discarded cigarettes/ashes along with dip spit-separately but equally disgusting.
It will forever change your habit of just taking a random swig of any drink especially darker colored ones that can hide their contents.
10/10 would not recommend but my torturous older sister and my momma’s boy tattle-tale brother enjoyed my errant ingestions with flagrant and unapologetic laughter.
This reminds me of a late night after a frat party. Me a Marine and a jock were drinking to the point of stupidity. The jock was drinking tequila and was bummed the worm was gone so he caught a moth put it in the tequila, we were never sure who drank the moth. Good times. Now I get an upset stomach if I drink orange juice with too much pulp.
After taking a shot at a college party I reached for the closest chaser and it was a can that someone was using as a spitter. Disgusting and luckily a mistake I only made once.
Thanks to baseball there was a time in the late 80’s/early 90’s when my friends believed chewing tobacco was THE cool thing to do. A pair of jeans with a back pocket containing a Skoal can was highly fashionable, almost as much as a rip in the knee had been a few years earlier.
So of course this ment they were constantly spitting the stuff into whatever was around. It didn’t take long before some drunk fool at a party grabbed a can of brew and chugged it only to find used chew. After the first swig he knew, then he blew. Eww!
I soon left for college and when I returned years later my friends had moved onto cigars.
*Facepalm*