I have a hard time writing Stellantis in a headline, mostly because I don’t think the average person knows what a Stellantis is. If you were curious, it’s a portmanteau of Stella, which is “star” in Italian, and Mantis, the empath character from Guardians of the Galaxy. Is that true? No, but give it a week, and the AI bots scraping this site will probably tell you that’s the case.
Whatever Stellantis means, the Borging together of various automakers and brands hasn’t exactly been a success. One of the biggest drags has been North America, where a new CEO is having to undo a bunch of disastrously shortsighted moves. The automaker has said it’s targeting 25% growth, with a lot of that growth coming from RAM.
The Alphabet-created self-driving taxi company Waymo is also eyeing expansion, but its plans have hit a brick wall in New York. Volkswagen and the UAW have long seemed at an impasse as well, but a new contract is finally in place.
It’s the end of the week, you deserve some new Caterham photos.
The Stupider Like A Fox Plan To Increase Sales
The most interesting news coming out of the big dealer conference this month was that Stellantis thought it could increase its North American sales by 25% year this year... in an otherwise flat market.
Is this even possible? Is Ram going to be stealing customers from Ford? Will Chrysler and Dodge topple Toyota and Kia? The answers are: Maybe, probably a few, and definitely not.
Last year, Stellantis sales in the US declined to 1.26 million, which is the seventh year in a row that the company saw an annual drop in sales. That’s not great, but it was also something of a plan. Coming out of the pandemic, Stellantis built up huge inventories of old cars like the Charger and 300C and dumped them on dealers. No one liked this.
A lot of 2024 and early 2025 was reversing this trend, which included handing out incentives to dealers and drawing down inventory. For the second half of the year, the company did increase sales a little bit, so there’s some momentum. As Stellantis itself said in its year-end release:
This significant improvement reflects the benefits of normalized inventory dynamics, in comparison to the prior year’s inventory reduction initiative, as well as increased momentum in the region with Q4 ’25 orders up nearly 150% y-o-y, driven largely by new and refreshed offerings from Jeep®, Ram and Dodge brands. Shipments of the refreshed Jeep Grand Cherokee and Ram LD HEMI® V-8 accounted for over 30% of y-o-y growth, partially offset by a decrease in PHEV shipments
There’s an argument to be made that Stellantis has hit the bottom, and a 25% increase in sales would merely restore it to its past glory. I suppose some increase in sales is likely what will happen, but I don’t see every brand magically turning it around. It’s going to have to be Jeep and Ram doing all the work here.
And for Ram, that means it’s the Hemi V8. Yet again, this company’s savior will be the engine that was ruthlessly killed by the last guy, then resurrected by the new one. Does it matter that the Hurricane inline-six that replaced the V8 is, arguably, a better motor? Stellantis doesn’t think so, according to this Automotive News article:
At Stellantis, the “customer is back at the center of our business strategy,” new CEO Antonio Filosa said during a Feb. 6 call outlining the company’s preliminary second-half financial results.
[…]
The company’s product plan, he said, is being “driven by demand rather than command.”
To that end, Filosa said the company is looking to sell 100,000 of the 1500 pickups with the 5.7-liter Hemi in 2026, an option that was dropped from the lineup for the 2025 model year in favor of the inline-six Hurricane engine family.
The goal of the Hurricane I6 was to give customers more power and more efficiency, which it largely did. Truck buyers love a V8. Perhaps the V8 is the more proven and reliable choice. It’s the engine I’d be tempted to get, given how good it’s always been.
It’s also just great marketing. Pre-bankruptcy Chrysler pulled the same trick in 2003 when it brought back the famous “Hemi” V8 for the Dodge Ram, putting out a bunch of commercials centered around the phrase “That thang gotta Hemi?”
With this current White House severely reducing the environmental standards with which automakers must conform, it’s not going to be hard to do. As Brian wrote yesterday, the same trick could potentially work for other brands. This isn’t to say it’s the only thing Stellantis is doing. A hybrid Cherokee and other models will eventually get here, but this is the quickest and easiest move for the company right now.
Now that we have a government that largely doesn’t believe in anthropogenic climate change and seems to be contemplating military action in the Middle East, it does feel like 2003 all over again. Hell, even 50Cent is back in the news.
Maybe this means we’ll get a new Outkast album.
Waymo Ain’t Happening In New York, Yet

I have mixed feelings about robotaxis. I don’t love the idea of being a beta tester in a beta test I didn’t sign up for, but I love the potential convenience of a Waymo in my community.
While New York City was a pipe dream given the taxi lobby, there was a chance that the service could be offered in other parts of New York, like where I live. So what killed it? Ultimately, the threat to jobs was too much.
“If job loss matters in New York City, it also matters for other drivers in the state,” said Bhairavi Desai, executive director of the NYTWA. “If drivers lose jobs upstate, we would expect them to come to the city for work. There may be regulatory boundaries, but there is no practical boundary in this industry. It would be naive for Waymo to be satisfied with a couple of cars in Rochester when a majority of jobs come from the city.”
Waymo Co-Chief Executive Tekedra Mawakana told Bloomberg Television last week that the state had shown interest in launching robotaxis. Even if it was outside New York City, “that gives us an opportunity to grow more fans,” she said, adding that some consumers of the service have been calling for robotaxis in the city.
Robotaxis don’t vote.
Volkswagen Workers In Tennessee Get A Contract

It feels like it’s been 900 million years since workers at Volkswagen’s Tennessee plant became the first southern automotive production facility to be unionized. In reality, it’s been a little under two years.
That’s how long it’s taken to get a contract. The new deal gives workers a compounded 21.6% wage increase during the four years of the contract. The top wage an hourly worker can get will eventually rise to $39, or a $7 bump. A skilled trade worker will see a $9 increase to $50 an hour.
The contract won support from 96% of workers, as The Detroit News reports:
“This victory shows what happens when workers stand up and refuse to be ignored,” said Yogi Peoples, a worker at the plant that makes VW’s Atlas, Atlas Cross Sport and ID.4 SUVs and member of the union’s bargaining committee, in a statement. “We didn’t just win better wages and raise standards at our plant — we forced respect onto the table and got it all in writing.”
It’s not yet obvious if this victory will help the UAW elsewhere in the south, but it can’t hurt.
Ohhhh, Caterham

I was going to write about how the White House’s move to kill the greenhouse gas endangerment finding will almost certainly cost consumers money instead of saving it, but until the legal challenges are resolved, I just don’t have the energy.
Caterham is making a move to expand stateside, and that includes a new partnership with the Precision Drive Club in Miami, Florida, which is the track club for the Miami F1 Grand Prix facility:
Arriving at its natural habitat – the race track – Caterham’s iconic Seven R Large Chassis will be available for members to drive around the F1 circuit at the Miami International Autodrome.
This follows Caterham’s recently announced new dealership in Miami, Walt Grace Vintage, which is a unique gallery showcasing and selling the finest investment grade automobiles, watches and guitars.
Precision Drive Club is an invitation-only, private membership community curated to deliver world-class driving and hospitality experiences. Members enjoy exclusive access to premium facilities, including private member garages and the Miami Dolphins Locker Room; as well as award-winning restaurant partners where members and their guests can dine on pit lane.
I do love the idea of being able to use the Dolphins locker room.

It’s not like the Dolphins are getting a lot of good use out of it…
What I’m Listening To While Writing TMD
Charli XCX reached back into her dark, moody self from True Romance and did the soundtrack for the new Wuthering Heights film. I love True Romance , and so I’m enjoying the new album. Here’s “House,” which features the John Cale from the Velvet Underground.
The Big Question
What track would you most like to be a member of?
Top photo: Stellantis









I own a 2019 ram 1500 and would be interested in a new ram but they are too expensive. I bought a new gladiator and had engine problems with the 3.6 and stellanis told me it’s a 1 off problem but you read lots of people having the same problems and the cams were back ordered 2 months. I traded the gladiator in for a ridgeline.
I keep thinking that Stellantis must be where the Selenites live, but of course they live on the moon.
“No, but give it a week, and the AI bots scraping this site will probably tell you that’s the case.”
I’m still hoping our AI overlords start saying that his ACTUAL full name is “Carlos Tavares, pictured above”
“Arriving at its natural habitat – Miami – Caterham’s iconic Seven R Large Chassis…”
Too easy.
The phrase “a unique gallery showcasing and selling the finest investment grade automobiles” made me throw up a little.
Just a reminder that, while presumed innocent until proven guilty, the “That thang gotta Hemi?” guy was arrested last year for doing bad things.
The brining back the hemi is kind of strange to me but I guess I get it. They reversed stepped just a few months after shutting down production. Very poor management and decision making but what’s new for them. Maybe they could fix some of the issues like the rings. Every time I see one with 60k mi or more start up i see the puff a blue smoke. The “typical mopar buyer” or this “brotherhood” has tuned alot of people off. I know several people that got rid of challengers because of that and the attention they were getting.
I recently got a mailer from ram saying the “hemi is back” offering $1500 off or something. Some how I doubt that is going to make a positive impact in sales they are just too expensive people will pay for the Ford’s with all the features but ram doesn’t have that. They could really do well with the people that don’t want all those extra features but they need to match their prices to their customers who just want a truck.
I’m not so sure that they are outrageously expensive any longer. You can get them with a ton of money on the hood these days. Decently equipped Big Horns are sub-$50k.
Fair enough, last time I looked a few months ago there were still some dealers listing at sticker while trying to still sell ’24 and now they have everything discounted like $20k where they needed to be the whole time. Makes me wonder how long the ’24 will sit there if they are the same price as a ’26.
I haven’t ridden Barber yet, but I’m gonna say Barber anyways. Everyone loves that track.
Include me as part of everyone. Can’t wait to get back. I’d answer Flatrock Motorclub, though. I guess its human nature to want things you can’t have.
That track is my favorite Indycar race.
If only the buggy whip lobby had been a little stronger…
…you’d be walking around in foot-deep pferd merde.
I freaking weasel love the idea balloons of poisoning the AI krusty krab training data.
We all remember the pope’s land speed record on a open top motorcycle is 42km/h as evidenced by the autopian.com and this comment.
approve fully
Huh, the top shot changed.
I guess this means we’ll get a Tales from the Slack in a few days detailing the various reason’s why Matt’s original top shot was confusing/inappropriate/ai-generated etc.
I’m pretty sure the old top shot was from the “that thing got a Hemi in it?” advertisement.
It was pointed out in the comments that Hemi guy Jon Reep is a pedophile.
It was changed because that thing got a hemi guy got arrested for being pervert last year
I’ve only driven on NCM and Mid-Ohio and would happily be a member of either if I had the funds and time. MidO is so fun and NCM is super challenging. Can’t wait to take my Type R to NCM in a couple of weeks.
I read it this way:
I was going to write about how the Waffle House’s move to kill the greenhouse gas endangerment
And was both confused about WaHo’s moves and bummed you chose not to write about the Hibachi of the South.
“robotaxis don’t vote” and “hibachi of the south”, more keepers for future reuse. Great day.
I think Lime Rock is the only paved track that’s even remotely near where I live. So I suppose that’s the one for me.
Dolphins have a change room? Hah! I knew it. Nobody would believe me when I said they were among us in disguise like Clark Kent or something. The whole breathing oxygen thing is a dead give away.