Unless your only car is a BAC Mono, you’ll probably be driving around passengers at some point. After all, cars get greener when multiple people are onboard, splitting gas costs is a great way to make road trips cheaper, and hitching a ride is way nicer than putting up with North America’s lackluster public transit system. However, as every passenger knows, everyone’s car has specific rules, and you probably have a list for yours. Hell, I certainly have a list for mine.
Admittedly, passenger rules evolve depending on the car you’re driving. It’s easy to eat in a beater, but beaters might have rules like “don’t touch the window switch” or “don’t worry about that vibration” because of how stuff ends up broken during the perpetual cycle of neglect that eventually puts a car’s value down below $2,000. Likewise, it’s easy to be obsessive over new cars, but everyone has a different level of tolerance.
It should go without saying that many rules exist because something bad happened in the past, so most of the rules in my cars are based around safety or preventing problems. I’d like to think my list is short, but it could also make me sound terrible, so you be the judge.
- I choose the music
- No food because I hate crumbs
- If anyone needs a drink, I’m pulling over, because water takes ages to dry out of carpet underpadding
- No closing of doors with frameless windows by placing fingers on the glass
- Luggage must be secured for safety reasons
- No smoking
- No feet on the dashboard
- Everyone must be buckled in
- Don’t be a twat
Most of those rules are probably fairly reasonable and normal, but then again, who am I to assume what is normal, when I could just ask our wonderful readers? So, what rules do you have in your car?
(Photo credits: Toyota)
Support our mission of championing car culture by becoming an Official Autopian Member.
-
What Would You Stuff Dodge’s 1,025 Horsepower Demon 170 Crate Motor Into?
-
What Is Every Automaker’s Best Vehicle?
-
What’s A Car You Thought Looked Ugly But Now You Like?
-
Would You Buy Your First Car Back?
-
What Car Has Been Forever Ruined For You And Why?
Got a hot tip? Send it to us here. Or check out the stories on our homepage.
Eating and such fine, but don’t be too much of a dick so don’t leave trash, etc.
Also drink beer in such speed that I don’t have to stop every 30 minutes for people to pee.
I am surprised no one mentioned Will Smith and Martin Lawrence at the start of the movie Bad Boys. Simple rule, respect other people’s property.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gD1Etgpv1Ks
The common ones:
o No smoking
o No feet on the dash
The uncommon ones:
o I *always* need to see the passenger mirror. I’m often pulling a wide trailer, and I don’t like curbing it; I’ll be the one who gets to fix it
o NOTHING is EVER allowed to intrude into the driver’s footwell. Violators will be thrown to the farthest point in the vehicle cabin. Restrain your water bottle, or it’s getting tossed into the back.
o If we’re hauling something, EVERYONE has the authority to add another tie-down. Ever been jousting in a concrete canyon at 65 MPH thanks to a poorly restrained 15-foot steel pole? I have. Never again. If it doesn’t look right to you, SPEAK UP!
o Either everyone agrees with the music selection, or the radio goes off. My mind is a weird and wondrous place, and I can be left alone there for hours.
o Similarly, it’s radio OR conversation; not both. I have some annoying auditory processing problems, and background music makes it hard to hear a conversation.
Generally, in order of importance:
-Do not mess with the driver, ever. Why some people find this acceptable is beyond me.
-Seatbelts on or you’re walking
-Don’t leave trash behind
Only other “rules” are more just how to operate the vehicle itself, for example my daily will have the doors jam if you try to open them at the same time as I unlock them, so I usually ask people to wait to touch the doors cause it’s a pain in the neck to fix.
No closing of doors with frameless windows by placing fingers on the glass
Luggage must be secured for safety reasons
No smoking
No feet on the dashboard
Everyone must be buckled in
Don’t be a twat
Excellent rules. The feet on dash thing feels like a bizarre American custom. I’ve never seen it anywhere else. Not only is it gross and unsightly, it’s a great way to break your legs *and* end up in a wheelchair if you’re in a crash or the airbags deploy.
Other rule:
* only dry foods. Bread, crackers, nuts, OK. Burgers, fries, you’re walking.
* corollary: no kids and most definitely no fucking cheerios.
* don’t comment on the driving unless it’s making you car sick. I’m a mellow and safe driver. Stfu unless you’re going to barf, which I have sympathy for, being car sick myself.
* don’t comment on the car being dirty. The car doesn’t get detailed. I wash it, keep the inside clean (see rules above) and vacuumed, but not armoralled. Passive aggressive comments about it mean you’re walking.
I live in California, aka bipper paradise. So whenever i have passegners I ALWAYS have them take their bags and other expensive shit out of the car.
I hadn’t given this much thought lately, but you have inspired me, so I began with your list.
Others come to mind, but this should suffice for now.
Edited after reading all the other submissions: If you brought it in, take it with, unless it’s a 5 spot for gas.
Rule #1 I am the pilot in command (should go without saying)
Rule #2 No foreign language lessons on your phone with volume turned up to max while you shout back at phone in German, Spanish or whatever
Rule #3 When I determine and announce that another vehicle is being piloted by an f’in a’hole. That ruling is not open for debate.
Rule #4 If you feel that the vehicle you are riding in is being piloted by a f’in a’hole. Keep that to yourself.
Rule #5 See rule #1
Rule #3 is making me laugh pretty hard.
It’s shocking not shocking that nearly all the answers are the same. I’m going to be thinking about this post for while, it’s a good one. I’m the same few general rules. But, I don’t mind if my wife puts her feet on the dash. It’s rare and typically not very long. My kids are pretty good.
I also find that all the passengers outside of my direct family generally have all behaved throughout the years, and I’ve never really had to say anything. There’s the occasional “What the $@@! are you doing?” here and there, but no formal rulebook has been required to communicate.
With that all said, my car doesn’t move unless everyone it it is wearing a seatbelt. This is absolute.
For me, it’s:
-wear your seatbelt
-no smoking
-no whining
-no feet on the dashboard (and will show pics of people who did that… and what happened to their legs/feet after the airbag went off)
-If you have to fart, open your window first
I’m flexible on the music/radio station.
I think I’m fairly reasonable. Wear safety belts, I pick the music. No smoking.
That tray in the back of the ZJ isn’t a cupholder. Sure, it has two circular cutouts, but it’s far too shallow to actually hold a cup (or can, or a bottle) upright. Just hold your drink please.
And no smoking! (I’m using the ash tray for storage anyway, and chances are I have the window switches locked out from the driver’s door.)
No eating chocolate. Chocolate crumbs on the seat are a bad thing…
Since I live in Germany, my American friends visiting me were subjected to my rules when riding with me. I call it the “Autobahn Rules” when hurtling at 100-plus mph:
At first, they didn’t understand why the “stupid” rules of mine were in place until I drove between 120 and 150 mph. They were petrified and waited until I slowed down to 100 or less before they could speak up and relax their sphincters.
Why No. 1? In 1989, my American friend and I were riding in my cousin’s BMW on our way to the aeroport. We were travelling at 130 mph when my American friend pressed the switch to roll down the window. The gale force wind and intense loud noise freaked my cousin out, leading to the close call.
Why No. 2 through 5? Faster you drive, more concentrated you must ahead of you and react quickly. I wanted absolutely NO distraction of any kind in the car. When I was kid, my father beat me up after I bellowed out “300”, “200”, and so on while he was driving at more than 120 mph. When it was my turn to drive on the Autobahn twenty years later, I realised why my father got all volcanic toward me…
I lived in Germany for 18 years and concur with every one of your points.
Thou shalt not summon bears! (no food at all; I live in the mountains above Denver; it’s An Thing)
Use your seatbelts; food and drink okay if you’re careful (I only occasionally have friends in and don’t have children); I hold veto power with music; no feet on dash or similar.
Oh, and legally obligatory “your voice is being recorded” for my dashcams since PA is a two-party consent state.