Sometimes it certainly seems like the week is becoming full of Mondays lately. Last Friday, my clothes dryer caught on fire. Then, I’d go on to blow the Autopian’s Nissan Murano CrossCabriolet’s front shocks doing a big jump. I also caught a cold of some kind and broke two garage doors. I’m pretty good at keeping myself happy enough, but gee, the world’s been throwing some curveballs lately. But hey, no matter how bad your week is, at least it’s not as bad as Jaguar’s current existence.
Friday’s Morning Dump was about the ways automakers have put happy faces on terrible earnings reports. Here’s what Matt wrote about Jaguar:
It could be worse, Jaguar Land Rover has my absolute favorite line in a press release:
Q4 wholesale volumes increased 61.1% compared to Q3 FY26, reflecting a return to normal production levels following the cyber incident.
JLR is on a different fiscal year, and what the company is saying here is that the company is doing better than when it literally couldn’t build cars. Sweet!
Eric Davis:
I’ve never gotten here early enough to leave a witty comment until now, and the first time I do I can’t think of anything good to say.
SAABstory:
Hey, you’re still doing better than Jaguar.
Cheap Bastard:
TBQ: Studebaker.
They only need to sell one vehicle to claim infinite YOY growth.
Bags:
Also Dodge’s goal for the Hornet.
Mechjaz:
Oof, that stings.
Have a great Monday!
Top graphic image: Jaguar
I feel bad getting a COTD at Dodge’s expense, because of how little effort it takes. Or roughly the same amount of effort they’ve put into their current lineup.