As I hope you’re aware, yesterday was the Autopian’s 1rd Members Only Track Day at Lime Rock Park, and I’m delighted to say it was a huge success. I think we had over 70 people show up, a crapton of amazing cars ranging from a Renault 4 to a bunch of lovely Porsche 911s, Jags, BMWs, a conversion van, a mobile repair shop, and so much more, all of which were sent on the track with ruthless, unhinged abandon. It was glorious.
We’re going to tell you all about it, but we have to get all the pictures collected, all of us collected – I need to get on the road this morning to get home – and that’ll take a few days, but I promise you’ll hear all about it, and, ideally, feel sharp pangs of regret for missing it. I’m kidding! I mean sharp pangs of excitement at the idea that we’ll do more, maybe by you! Also, maybe sharp pangs of gas pain, in which case I think you should take some time in the bathroom.
But one thing I can tell you about is a miraculous achievement I believe I have achieved, miraculously, with the Citroën 2CV I dragged to the event. It was an achievement that required the delightfully unexpected assist from an Autopian named David (not co-founder, rust-addled David, a different one) and one that, while I haven’t officially checked it, I think qualifies as a track record for Lime Rock Park, and perhaps the whole Northeast, and perhaps even the nation.
Probably not the world. But still. Anyway, it all started with a gift, a gift based on something specific I’ve written about before: Citroën’s weird fetish for sticking grandfather clocks into 2CVs:
Seriously, it felt like any time there was the flimsiest reason to, they’d shove a grandfather clock into a 2CV. You’d think watches were banned in France, and this was the only way they could tell time. Anyway, this is very much A Thing.
So look what Dave brought to the track day:
A freaking grandfather clock. Which we, of course, then put in the 2CV, just like Citroën trained us to.
Again, a freaking grandfather clock. David is someone who really knows how to commit to the bit. Who the hell brings a grandfather clock to a track day? David, that’s who, and hell yeah he did.
I was, of course, surprised and delighted. And, yes, I was more than happy to cram that thing in my very limber car and tear ass around the track:
I was giving rides around the track to members, showing off how in a 2CV you never need to use the brakes on a turn because the thing can’t flip over. Sure, it’ll lean until you can lick the pavement out the window, but it will not flop over. Even with a grandfather clock sticking out of the roof.
I mean, look:
Actually, I suspect that the clock made the car even more stable, acting as a sort of carefully-designed wing to add downforce.
I drove it all over the autocross track, and also on the main track when we did a parade lap, which is why I think I set a track record. You see, I’m pretty certain that no one has ever driven a car with a grandfather clock in it around the track at Lime Rock. Which means I set the Fastest Lap for a Car with a Grandfather Clock in It track record! In a 2CV! Holy crap!
Feel free to check me on that, of course, but I have a feeling it’s true. The Autopian now holds a Fastest Lap Speed Record for a grandfather-clock-carrying car. That’s been our dream forever, or at least 15 minutes after David rolled up with a grandfather clock in his Maverick.
Dude brought a grandfather clock to the track. Amazing.
I am so sad I missed this. That is fantastic.
I have a question regarding the clock. Was the ‘head’ fastened to the base originally, or was it secured for the track day. I may have made some wildly inaccurate statements about grandfather clocks and I would like clarification.
I can’t help but think old Willie would be ecstatic to see how much road you’re getting under the 2CV’s tires. Having fun and bringing joy to people.
If cars are a medium for telling stories, you’re writing a Douglas Adams book.
Wow, this is so unbelievably awesome! Sounds like it was such a fun wonderful time. This is why The Autopian is the best site on the net ever!
My daughter looked in our rear view mirror during the parade lap and immediately thought the Citroen had a huge erection. I mean, if there’s one thing the French are really good at… that thing goes off twelve times at midnight.
This is one of those weird things I have the ability to recreate fairly easily. We need to know a lap time so that we can beat it pls thx
All hail David for thinking of the grandfather clock. Time flies, within reason, when you’re having fun.
“Grandfather clocks record Grandfather Clock Car lap-time; Crowd goes cuckoo.”
(Maybe in a few years…)
Jason putting in the hard yards to work on Autopian Tiktok content.
The French supposedly say, “ I know it works in practice but how does it work in theory?” In that spirit, did anyone think to compare clock readings between the grandfather clock and a stationary clock before and after lapping to see if there is relativistic time dilation when driving the 2CV?
Brilliant!
This makes me so happy.
The comments today, are a riot as well.
Id love to go to the 2rd (Turd) Autopian track day.. if it was on the west coast.
Wouldn’t #3 be the… turd? 😉
Nah, that one’s going to be the 3th!
3st
When you said David showed up with a grandfather clock in his Maverick, my aged brain immediately pictured it sticking out of the side of a ’71 Maverick 2-door. 🙂
Same here, completely forgot there is a modern Maverick. However, either way a good chunk of the clock was probably erect out the back. Sorry, couldn’t stop.
I know this isn’t the reason for it, but the image of a 2CV with a grandfather clock sticking way out of it gives me strong Top Gear vibes, how they used to give each other ridiculous presents during their adventures.
At least it wasn’t a grand piano. Things generally didn’t end well for either the car or the piano.
I was totally thinking “Top Gear road trip gift”-adjacent when I was planning it.
I was also wondering (/worrying) if there would be more that one!
I was lucky enough to attend yesterday and helped guide the grandfather clock into the backseat. Some takeaways:
Glad I got a ride with Jason and helped with the “Clock removal” The whole event was a blast!
Without the basket of eggs, and mandatory bird cage? Deux Chevaux Merde !
Time to make the beignets.
I understood that reference.
I don’t think you hold that record.
Martinsville Speedway in Virginia gives the winner of NASCAR races there a grandfather clock as a trophy.
A Craftsman Truck series winner has definitely taken the clock around for a victory lap.
I was going to point this out.
It’s still the record at Lime Rock!
For now. You can also do this trick with a Miata, and the Nutmeg Miata Club runs hosts a meetup at Limerock where you do parade laps between races.
I’m making the molds for my carbon fiber grandfather clock right now.
Well, as they say, records are made to be broken.
I will use ballast to match the mass of the original David Clock, the new standard for this sporting endeavor.
Seriouisly, if someone comes up with enforceable rules about a grandfather clock passenger, I bet Lemons would add a class.
There’s always a record that Can be found, you simply need at times to be specific…
“Fastest lap time by a 2CV.
Around Lime Rock..
In June, 2026…
With a Grandfather clock in the back”
There, that aught to do it! 🙂
I’ve seen people take novelty items to Radwood shows, like the one time I took a 3 foot tall Game Boy to one, but David takes the cake for committing to a bit. Well done, sir.
David, sir, you are a LEGEND
Porsche Sport Chrono Package, but make it French
???? this is gold