Matt Hardigree
A long-time writer and editor in the car space, you may have read my work in Wired, Jalopnik, and the newsletter for my local Ultimate Frisbee team. I love writing about the car industry, driving minivans, and dreaming about owning various European Fast Fords. I drive an E39 530i Sport (with the stick) and a CR-V Hybrid. You can email me at matt@theautopian.com or follow me
on Instagram. Oh, I'm also the Publisher of The Autopian. That seems less interesting than the European Fords thing, though.
Thanks for the link to the story about Jason bailing out his parents. I read it back then, but it’s glorious and deserves re-reading and probably an Apple TV+ miniseries
On a somewhat unrelated note: the sale of the lighting site closed last week and THE ORANGE LOGO IS BACK! Maybe things will be OK.
Shit Adrian. Was it a live salmon? Were they harmed by the handling? So many questions
Should we start a Go Fund Me so we can have bail money ready?
“I don’t know what cab ride videos that Adrian is talking about here.”
Uh huh. Sure you don’t.
Cash cab
I guess you could call it that.
Make new stickers, that’s graphics, get Torch involved.
Swap IGX for JFK, good old Horace Williams, it might break even for $45.
Maybe it is not a Taxi, it’s a mobile venue for tail light discussion and a non-profit.
There is this to whom it may concern envelope.
It is an undercover vehicle part of an operation that can’t be discussed at this time. The Torchinski fellow is deeply involved, do not apprehend.
WTF actually is “handling salmon in a suspicious way?” Does that mean you’re obviously enjoying it too much? If so, I’m guilty of that at least a couple times a month.
Ah, I see (thanks for the wiki link) that it means being in possession of salmon that comes from a suspicious (i.e.: perhaps illegal) source. Like 98% of the salmon I’ve ever consumed comes from the grocery store (Trader Joe’s, etc…) so that’s probably not an issue.
Still, the over-the-hill-revolutionary in me want to scream ‘FUCK THE SALMON POLICE” even though I’m actually 100% in favor of sustainable fishery policy.
Pretty sure either sex with or failing to store it at proper temperature. I put sex first for a reason
Maybe both
I thought he lived it a quarter-mile at a time. Maybe that was someone else.
But with the changali a quarter mile is like 3 months.
one quarter-mile = one quarter
Now the word is starting to look funny
quarter quarter quarter quarter quarter quarter quarter quarter quarter quarter
Quarter? I hardly know ‘er!
Semantic satiety is a semantic satiety is a semantic is a semantic is a semantic is semantic is semantic semantic semantic semantic
I think we all do, it’s just that the vast majority will never admit it, and not always without good reason.
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6611240-three-felonies-a-day
Regular people are boring. That has its pluses and minuses.
I’m no stranger to this with regard to my own parents…
Glad Torch is still alive and kicking and creating chaos! I look forward to reading about the taxi cab adventures.
Is there anything in the local area with the initials JFK? Like maybe he opens a store called “Jason’s Fascinating Knickknacks”? Jason could make a lot of cash driving people there and try to sell overpriced cruft. Gotta keep up the hustle in this economy!
Screw it just don’t stop or show up then they think you are a real cab company.
It seems about time for a bail fund to be set up. Use the next membership drive to fund Jason’s future release.
Can you post bail with a car? Imagine trying to use the CrossCabriolet. It’s a rare and majestic beast that the owners will surely return for.
The fact that he had the CALL 911 lights on and nobody did absolutely does not surprise me.
When I lived in Chicago years ago, half the cabs on the road drove around with them lit up.
It would be worth it to pay $45 and get to drive around with Jason for a while. Even if we ended up in a jail cell.
I think Jason would end up in jail and I wonder if he would think riding around with you was worth it?
I would hope so. Arcane vehicular knowledge and trivia along with an appreciation for batshit crazy ideas and art. What could possibly go wrong?
Everything that can go right!
The man is a living, breathing Chaos Sigil. An otherworldly gremlin not of this realm. Great power for destruction is contained within. Respect him for what he is.
If you hire me, I promise to get arrested within 48 hours.
Are you extending this offer just to The Autopian or in general?
For everything except cocaine mule because I’m stealing it before I get caught.