Home » Jason’s Arm Is More Juiced Than Mark McGwire In 1998

Jason’s Arm Is More Juiced Than Mark McGwire In 1998

Slack Tales Arm Juice
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Bosco
Bosco
2 days ago

Torch – time for a Damn Good Design article featuring your juicy step-by-step instruction card.

Stef Schrader
Stef Schrader
2 days ago

b u l g e

Ronan McGrath
Ronan McGrath
4 days ago

Jason is the basic input to complete insanity here. I have no idea why VWs matter, not do I read old brochures. Pump the hell outa the arm, otherwise we might get serious.
Get better Jason.

Cars? I've owned a few
Cars? I've owned a few
4 days ago

Re: How it feels when they pull it out… Two weeks ago, a visiting nurse came to my house and removed the PICC line that I had been using for similar reasons for six weeks. Despite the disturbing mental image of the process, in reality there was no sensation at all. I averted my eyes and then saw the removed line laying on the table out of my peripheral vision. Apply pressure on the hole where it was inserted for two minutes, stick on a small bandage and Bob’s Your Uncle.

The best part is being able to shower again without having to wear a protective vinyl glove that looks like it would be appropriate for reaching up an elephant’s ass to clear out whatever was blocking it.

Best wishes!

Donald Petersen
Donald Petersen
4 days ago

Yeah, my wife has had two PICC lines in the past ten months. The removal of the first one surprised the hell out of me. Like you said, she didn’t really feel it, and neither of us expected it to be nearly three feet long. I hadn’t seen it being put in, so I’d expected it to be maybe six or eight inches. She averted her eyes both during installation and removal, which was probably wise.

MikeInTheWoods
MikeInTheWoods
4 days ago

Careful Jason, those things can be slippery when wet. You’ve been shot through the heart but you’re OK. You give taillights a good name.

Totally not a robot
Totally not a robot
4 days ago

It kind of bugs me that Jason misspelled “extension.” I know it’s just Slack and not meant for mortal eyes, but I kind of expected more from our fearless leader.

Jonathan Hendry
Jonathan Hendry
5 days ago

This Harkonnen cosplay (David Lynch edition) is getting a little out of hand.

Dodsworth
Dodsworth
5 days ago

I hate to kick a man when he’s down, but if you think the cat didn’t know what he was doing then you’re very gullible.

Phuzz
Phuzz
2 days ago
Reply to  Dodsworth

Possibly the reason for the infection in the first place. Cats have filthy mouths.

Ben
Ben
2 days ago
Reply to  Dodsworth

I hate to kick a man when he’s down

You are obviously not a cat then. 😉

Mike F.
Mike F.
5 days ago

Well you’ll get plenty of sympathy from me on this one. I’ve had two stem cell transplant procedures, each involving an extended period of time in which a tube that entered my jugular vein protruded out from a spot just below my collarbone. The tube terminated in an area quite near my heart. It was put in so that they could pump stem cells as well as all sort of other meds, IV fluids, platelets, and whatever else sounded good on a given day. They didn’t trust me to hook it up, clean it, etc. This is possibly because the tube was rather large and would have emptied my body of much of its blood in a few minutes, should something have gone very wrong. This is also possibly because they knew what a complete klutz I am and didn’t trust me the way they trust Jason (which makes me sad). The tube bifurcated shortly after it exited my body and looked a little like a couple of stereo connectors from a distance. Often thought that I should have gotten a picture with a couple of my stereo cables taped to the tubes and connected to my amp. Would have been a fun shot.

Anyway, good luck, Jason, and I hope this is all over soon!

Last edited 5 days ago by Mike F.
Arrest-me Red
Arrest-me Red
5 days ago

Glad that things are looking up.

Having a cat chew on something the should not is par for the course *glares at cat as they suddenly wash themselves*

If you want another one, I know someone who rescues them on her farm in NC 🙂

Idiotking
Idiotking
5 days ago

I can relate: I had cancer six years ago, and as part of the chemo process, they put in what they call a port: a dime-shaped disk right over one of your ribs connected to a tube running straight into your heart. You go in for chemo and they stick you in the port as opposed to putting a needle in your arm, which is good for the veins in your arm and make sure the death juice goes right through your heart to the cancer cells.

Taking care of the port was a process: you have to clean it out weekly to make sure it’s clear, which involves a nurse juicing it with saline, which you can immediately taste in your mouth. They left mine in until after the baby came out (5.5 lbs, one mass, been clear since then) figuring I might need post-op chemo, but I never did. I had it in for a year and a half after surgery and they finally decided it could come out.

Trust Doesn't Rust
Trust Doesn't Rust
5 days ago

Two questions.
(1) Have you ever spilled any of the liquids and (2) if so, did you shout “The juice is loose!!”?

Adrian Clarke
Adrian Clarke
2 days ago

Spill it? He rips that line out and fire hoses it round Autopian HQ while cackling. We all get a bath in Jason Juice.

10001010
10001010
5 days ago

Become a member and gain access to juicy behind the scenes Autopian content!!!

Taargus Taargus
Taargus Taargus
5 days ago

Was hoping for a photoshop of Jason with Mark McGwire’s arm on him. Just saying, if you get bored. I’m picturing the episode of Rick and Morty where Morty gets the Thunderdome champion arm in the Mad Max themed episode.

MATTinMKE
MATTinMKE
5 days ago

Or the episode of Family Guy where Quagmire’s right arm is huge while his left is normal?

Taargus Taargus
Taargus Taargus
5 days ago
Reply to  MATTinMKE

That also works.

Icouldntfindaclevername
Icouldntfindaclevername
5 days ago

Truthfully, I’m surprised they sent him home with a PICC line.

That being said, just imagine all the stuff you could push straight into yourself! Wait a minute to see what it does, and move onto the next thing. Main lining Mountain Dew sounds fun LOL

Get better Torch! Oh and please don’t test the above Mountain Dew main lining!!

Arrest-me Red
Arrest-me Red
5 days ago

Good thing David can’t mainline, I don’t want to be part of that discussion with the doctor.

“You injected what?!?!”

Bryan Pai
Bryan Pai
5 days ago

Stay juiced Torch!

Buzz
Buzz
5 days ago

Be glad he is putting juice into his arms and not pulling it out. The sound of a wound vac slurping away is not one you will easily forget.

Fun medical fact, Werner Theodor Otto Forssmann invented the modern cardiac catheterization technique. He figured there was a better way to get access to the heart without necessarily having to crack open a patient’s chest. He proved it was safe by doing it to himself after tricking a nurse who volunteered for the procedure and fighting off a colleague mid-catheterization when they both realized that he wasn’t operating on her but on himself instead.

MATTinMKE
MATTinMKE
5 days ago
Reply to  Buzz

Wild & crazy times at the Forssmann house!

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