I’m writing this blog right now–our very first LIVEBLOG–because my co-founder in this venture, David Tracy, who really should be on here helping to run this thing, just sold a Jeep Cherokee to a nice lady who came from out of town to get it, and now we find that the Jeep is billowing steam on the side of the road, stranding the nice lady and her regrettable purchase there.
This is a genuine shitshow, so we may as well get some clicks out of it at least, right? Also, we have a Full Disclosure policy here at The Autopian, so when we ourselves do stupid, unfortunate things or get weird rashes you can be sure that you’ll have a front row seat so you can really feel our pain and humiliation.
Very, very shortly after this picture was taken of David’s Jeep pulling out of the driveway, we know something caused the XJ to overheat, and the power steering–maybe the belt, maybe the pump itself–failed.
David has officially informed me he feels terrible this happened, and confirms that it’s both a buyer’s and seller’s worst fucking nightmare. David has also informed me that this is the same woman who sold him that perfect Land Cruiser that made it all the way to Seattle and back, and this is how David repays her.
Damn.
UPDATE 2:32 PM: I can now confirm that David has told me that this was his “nicest” Jeep Cherokee, and he was conflicted about selling it. Just let that sink in a bit.
This is another picture of the Nice Lady before the breakdown. Sources close to David have told The Autopian that she was once the owner of this same Jeep, prior to David owning it. The Autopian’s crack team of news analysts have asserted with a 78.4% degree of confidence that the Nice Lady likely does not look nearly this happy at the current time, at her current location.
UPDATE 2:35 PM: David seems to be attempting to remedy the situation, but reports on the ground are scarce.
UPDATE 2:37 PM: Motorists in the Troy, Michigan area have reported seeing a crazed figure trailing a cloud of iron oxide dust behind him darting among highway traffic, emitting a haunting wail of pain and regret. We have not been able to confirm these sightings.
UPDATE 2:40 PM: A search of recent correspondence with David via The Autopian’s internal comm system has found printouts of missives from David that state that the woman who purchased the Jeep is “wonderful” and “does not deserve this.”
UPDATE 2:42 PM: Autopian researchers digging into David Tracy’s financial records have unearthed possible evidence that the money paid for the Jeep may already have been spent on some other shitbox. We are unable to confirm these reports as of press time.
UPDATE 2:44 PM: COMMUNICATIONS WITH DAVID HAVE BEEN RE-ESTABLISHED
We have received an image from David’s implanted neck camera showing that he is in his Jeep J10 pickup and proceeding to the parking lot where the Jeep’s new owner has managed to park:
UPDATE 2:46 PM: Text communication with David has been re-established. Here’s a direct quote, which gives a good indication of Tracy’s current tenuous mental condition:
At this point, David suggested he would fish around in the seats and floor of his truck to locate a rosary he thought he had there, but as of press time he has only located several stale french fries.
God could not be reached for comment regarding David’s plight, or his plan to use a rosary to effect a favorable outcome.
UPDATE 2:52 PM: Calls to the American Council of Churches as well as the American Dental Association regarding their positions on this still-developing situation have so far gone unanswered, though sources inside both organizations have confirmed that the unofficial policy is to distance themselves from David as much as possible during this time.
UPDATE 2:55 PM: A statement from David Tracy has been received at The Autopian Southeast Regional Office. The statement reads:
(static, indecipherable speech, possible sobbing)
“[the black smoke] is very very bad news possibly indicating internal engine damage
This motor is done.”
I hope to one day run into David trying to repair a Jeep in a parking lot. I feel like it is the car equivalent of seeing Arnold Palmer drink an Arnold Palmer.
I almost spit my Arnold Palmer through my nose reading that one…
I don’t know how exactly you all plan to top this, and STAB? As an old guy I know not to spurt out too much too soon. Save some for later.
Days later and I’m still laughing at random moments as “S*** Twice and Boltered” pops into my head. Autopian is setting off on world record pace, let’s hope they don’t bonk!
This is Tracy gold
I actually went back and looked at the picture thinking it was the actor Tracy Gold from Growing Pains who bought it. lol
Well, I guess I’m glad I didn’t give in and just end up buying it for no actual reason – driving by it multiple times did make me wonder if I needed an XJ in my life.
That question has been answered very clearly now.
As person on the other side of the pond, claiming any Jeep as reliable really baffles me. I mean they are according to Finnish MOT statistic top 10 least reliable vehicles out there. Even counting the large french stuff. And we are pretty strict about the maintanance. Of course they sell about <10 units/year, so perhaps we only get the monday editions.
Regarding this forum: why the heck the posting form is at the bottom? Not that I don't anyho scroll down, but it's super inconvenient. place for it. Perhaps make it atleast floating or something.
The only reasonable solution now is to swap the 4.0L with a fresh unit of Leaning Tower of Power. I mean, you can only replace bulletproof with more bulletproof.
That cheeky $3,210.00 ebay bid that I put on this thing back in October suddenly looks like a bullet dodged 🙂
Love the new website. However …
I’m not sure when it became fashionable to insert cursing and foul language into what should be a pleasant little article about automotive experiences. F- bombs don’t enhance writing. They’re jarring and unnecessary and don’t get you a seat at the cool kids table.
Pretty uppity for someone who uses that many contractions
DT offers a 30 day, 3 thousand mile warranty – right?
Hey, that’s better than most BHPH lots and all other private sellers.
3 day, 30 miles
No, private seller’s warranty is 5/50. 5 minutes or 50’ from the property line. Whichever comes first.
Silver lining time – it may not run (properly or at all for much longer), but it is still the nicest Jeep he owns
The Jeep gods have forsaken you David, for you have been selling too many Jeeps, removing them from their beloved pasture in your back yard; complete with their own mud pit to frolic in. Let this be a lesson to you, thou shalt buy Jeeps…thou shalt not sell them (except for that nice J10 that I would love to own)!
So sorry Nice lady, even sorrier David.
Great content though!
Jason, great play by play. (｡♡‿♡｡)
Never take the freeway exit for “good intentions”, never. But then again more of David’s pain, means more content. Bring on the exploding head gaskets!
It seems entirely plausible that David Tracy, in an altered state of consciousness, sabotaged this poor 4.0 due to inescapable masochistic compulsion.
Id like to say… Ive never had the good fortune to sell anything that Ive owned after Ive fixed it.
Purely because I think Im too awesome… and REALLY frucking stupid to sell good shit to someone else.
Also, cause Im a dumbass who wouldnt sell shit I owned to someone else. — Knowing theyd ask… why in GODS GREEN EARF would you sell this? As in.. WHY ON GODS GREEN EARF.. DID YOU BUY THIS?
In short…
I feel bad for all parties involved, especially the parts people at the retail place cause she wanted to replace the Wiper Arms.
Also… I had ONE HELL of a bad day.
Id also like to say… Id I had money (and I dont), taste (and I dont), Id be buying Honda Accords / Acura Legends out the Kazoo. Id prob wind up in the same… puddle of fun Mr David Tracy is in.
The Jeep doesn’t want to leave the pack.
But hey, perfect timing for some content, wouldn’t have wanted to waste this gold at Jalopnik.
9/10 dentists agree the 4l is bulletproof.
This is what happens when that 1/10 dentist gets out.
As the unintended genesis of this entire chain of events, I can’t but shake my head for my dear friend NICE LADY. Who, all be assured, is a NICE LADY.
Either for brevity, clarity, or some other professional writers’ device, David Tracy has not included the entire backstory of this NICE LADY, the Jeep, the Land Cruiser, and everything that led up to this day. Probably a story left for another day.
NICE LADY just texted me to share a laugh.
We both hold out that all will end well.
Nice Lady is awesome, and I’m going to make this right! I promise!
I’m sorry this happened to you, as you are just starting a business. No good deed goes unpunished. We all know you will make it right, as that’s the kind of guy you seem to be.
However, it really could be karma for leaving all of that Rolling Rock out in the sun for so long….Maybe you should start keeping most of the foodstuffs indoors? Maybe even refrigerate some of it? It might even hep you fight of a case of 4.0L Karma, or perhaps even Trench Foot.
One time I sold a 12 year old C6 corvette to a guy from out of state and he called me furious the next day because it threw an airbag code on his drive home. He threatened to sue me before I talked him down and told him to check the connector under the passenger’s seat, which he did and it went away. Never heard from him again, but I expected an angry phone call for everything that went wrong with it down the road. Not as extreme a used car buying/selling nightmare as this, but it never ceases to surprise me how many people buy used cars and expect new car reliability. The moral of this story is that there’s a reason why that five year old Alfa Romeo is selling for less than half of what it cost new, buddy, and even a famously reliable motor like the Jeep 4.0 may or may not be on its last good mile when it leaves David’s driveway.
Catastrophic failure would be a concern, but even more than that, I envision the day that I try to private sale a car; it will go to some asshole who harasses me for six months after the sale.
There’s a spectrum here that depends on the perceived condition of the vehicle. Something that is a “daily driver” and being sold in good condition, I would certainly expect more than one day without something on the dash lighting up. Though, yes, I’d probably do some minor digging/troubleshooting to see what was up before calling the previous owner. But yes, I don’t expect new reliability, but there is some reliability to be expected (again, depending on the price/condition/vehicle).
Yeah, I agree. I was just on the receiving end of such a transaction when I bought a 99 Boxster that performed flawlessly on the test drive. I paid with a personal check and the owner held the car for a few days while it cleared and was kind enough to shuttle it down to me when the funds were in his account. When he arrived at my place it was idling high and he mentioned that fact. It wasn’t crazy high, but a little over 1k. The battery had just been replaced along with a befouled air/oil separator, so he estimated that the ECU was recalibrating and that it would settle down with some miles. Well, it did not, and after a week of spirited driving, it was still idling high and I had a text exchange with him about what I might look into for a fix. We agreed that it was likely a dirty throttle body, idle control valve, or MAF, so I went about cleaning those but to no avail. I finally replaced the MAF to the tune of about $250 and that fixed it. When I told him that I’d solved the problem, I was hoping that he’d offer to pay for it, but he didn’t and I didn’t push the issue. It was sort of a grey area since it had failed after I wrote the check but before it was delivered. If roles were reversed, I would have picked up the tab since the condition changed on my watch but I guess he felt like it was working when we shook hands and that was when it became mine.
Yikes. I always make sellers sign an AS IS agreement, idk what they’re doing after the buy it. Sold a really clean GTI, in the test drive when I was in the car, guy hit the rail road tracks way to fast and got air. Had 5 friends over to look at it. They give him the thumbs up and he buys it. 6 hours later he complains it’s leaking from oil pan. Sorry buddy. You signed a very secure AS IS document, no warranty expressed or implied, and likely smashed the oil pan during your test drive.
That said it’s weird to hear of a 4L having a catastrophic failure…. wonder if it’s something dumb.
This hits close to home for me. True story: I actually put in an offer to buy this Jeep.
“If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn’t, then it was never meant to be.”
Time to put it on the trailer and take it home.
I await the results of the (I hope) inevitable autopsy. It will be important that Tracy learns what happened, otherwise the takeaway might be “David shouldn’t sell cars,” and we all know that that’d be a bad outcome. Troy needs him to sell cars.
I’m gonna invite some powertrain engineers over, and we’ll give it a once-over.
I think this was a movie in the early 60s: David Tracy played by Rock Hudson and The Nice Lady played by Doris Day.
Buddy Hackett plays DT’s coworker at a new publication.