Some cars can’t avoid the stereotypes that follow them. You know the ones. Big trucks are supposedly driven by people who are compensating for something. Corvettes are supposedly driven by old guys. Oh, and Nissan Altima owners are most likely to be seen doing 100 mph on a donut spare. Poor Altima owners!
Thomas wrote about how the Nissan Altima isn’t quite dead yet. Nlpnt:
Before the demise of the Chevy Malibu I summed up the choice between it and the Altima as “Do you want to look like a state employee on official business, or like you get surprise visits from one?”
If there’s an Altima and a Malibu parked in front of the same place, someone’s peeing in a cup while someone else watches.
Data:
MORTICIAN: Bring out your dead!
NISSAN: Here’s one — nine pence.
ALTIMA: I’m not dead!
MORTICIAN: What?
NISSAN: Nothing — here’s your nine pence.
ALTIMA: I’m not dead!
MORTICIAN: Here — he says he’s not dead!
NISSAN: Yes, he is.
ALTIMA: I’m not!
MORTICIAN: He isn’t.
NISSAN: Well, he will be soon, he’s very ill.
ALTIMA: I’m getting better!
NISSAN: No, you’re not — you’ll be stone dead in a moment.
MORTICIAN: Oh, I can’t take him like that — it’s against regulations.
ALTIMA: I don’t want to go in the cart!
NISSAN: Oh, don’t be such a baby.
MORTICIAN: I can’t take him…
ALTIMA: I feel fine!
NISSAN: Oh, do us a favor…
Nsane In The MembraNe:
The Altima shall ride eternal, shiny and chrome…with bumpers held on by duct tape, a headlight out, and temporary tags that expired 2 years ago as it terrorizes the roads of hell.
Matt wrote a Morning Dump about how Lucid lost half of its value in a couple of hours, possibly because of a blog. Drew:
Whom do you trust on the Internet?
Only people I know. If I read that there was a car accident, I didn’t drive past it, I don’t trust it. When Aunt Sally emails me telling me she needs $500 in iTunes gift cards to get out of prison, I send the gift cards immediately.
Have a great evening, everyone!
Top graphic image: Nissan
I have no idea why, but for some reason I read that Nissan/Altima/Mortician exchange entirely in British as if it were a Monty Python skit.
“Do you want to look like a state employee on official business, or like you get surprise visits from one?” – This is so Golden
That people driving big trucks have small packages seems like one of those tropes, that falls apart on any thoughtful analysis. I don’t have a big truck or a big package, so I have no dog in this fight, but if I did have well blessed man parts, I’d be MORE likely to be brazen and showy, not less. I’d peacock all over the place. ‘Look at my chromed out blinged out temple to diesel! Guess what, I’m also well endowed!’ Try to imagine god having blessed you in such a way. Would you be driving around in a Prius, no f’n way. You’d be sacrificing myself to the road gods at 200MPH on a 1100CC death machine and towing alligators out of the swamp with my TRX on 44″ tires.
After Hyundai (I think) ran a series of commercials implying their owners were so self assured they didn’t need to show off.
HOWEVER, once they ran the ads, the obvious implication was that anyone faking it would buy their car, instead of a Ferraghini!
So everyone started calling the brand with the ads, the ‘little peepee car’ !
Someone in marketing didn’t think that one through!
Damn if I didn’t just get the Aunt Sally e-mail. And this just after I was able to get my grandson out of a bind somewhere in Nebraska, hope my checking account balance is ok…
Meanwhile, the Dodge Charger is the choice for those on parole and their parole officers.
I miss being able to rely on crown Vics
They’re still showing up from small towns letting go of them.