The Most Metal Name In The Automotive Industry Right Now: COTD

Car names tend to be pretty boring today. Aside from recognized nameplates like Corvette, Bronco, and Charger, way too many cars are getting named with alphabet soups of letters and numbers. Come on, Acura, bring back the Legend! Anyway, one brand stands out for one heck of a name.

In today’s Morning Dump, Matt wrote about the new Genesis performance brand, Magma. If nothing else, it’s a darn cool name. But here comes Zeppelopod with the COTD win:

BTW, let’s please recognize how metal that name is: MAGMA. I’m pretty sure I saw them open for Rob Zombie at L’Amour.

Sure, when they were still underground. They sold out and now they’re just Lava.

Last week’s Tales From The Slack was hilarious, and if you’re a member, you got to read some gold. To give you a hint of last week’s episode, Jason wrote about how David wanted to publish a random screenshot of a story about Volkswagen. This screenshot included an ad with the provocative headline, “What’s Causing 6 Months of Unexplained Diarrhea?” I mean, I suppose working on a Volkswagen could cause that. LTDScott:

When you’re driving in your Jeep and your undies start to seep…

Come on, let’s get a thread going with the childhood diarrhea song!

I’m pretty sure staff cannot win COTD, but Jason had a great one:

When driving in your Chevy and pants get awful heavy
When you’re wrenching on your Fiat and your butt is blasting shi-at
When you’re sitting in your coupé but your pants are full of poop
When you’re dragging down the strip but your trousers start to drip
When you’re goin’ really fast and your butthole starts to blast

AssMatt:

Why would he argue? You are the number two expert at the Autopian.

Hugh Crawford went through the work to find a chunk of our poop-related articles and found at least 10 posts:

So I was curious how much poop related content was on the Autopian. Quite a lot it seems, even removing shitbox showdown.

This obviously.

[Click here to see the links for 9 more poop-related articles]

Btw the comments seem to be having a bout of irregularity, they keep disappearing while I’m typing.

In other news, Thomas wrote about how Jeep killed the Jeep Wagoneer name. Jesus Chrysler drives a Dodge:

New Jeep trim lineup:

– Grand Wagoneer
– Grand Wagoneer Royale
– Grand Wagoneer Royale with cheese

Josh O:

Is that the European lineup? The US gets the Grand Wagoneer 1/4 Pounder, and Grand Wagoneer 1/4 Pounder with Cheese and since we are special the Grand Wagoneer Double 1/4 Pounder with Cheese, not to be confused with the Grand Wagoneer L Double Big Mac.

Have a great evening, everyone!