If you’ve been keeping up with the news, I’m sure you’ve heard about how a professor of Comparative Automotive Animatorology was disbarred – despite her never having taken a bar exam or even been part of the field of law – for making claims that a GM Dustbuster type minivan – more formally known as U-body vans, and, more specifically, the Chevy Lumina APV, Oldsmobile Silhouette, and the Pontiac Trans Sport – showed up in an episode of the long-running animated sitcom, The Simpsons.
The professor, Dr. Perfidy Krakenmangoes, presented a paper at this year’s International Conference of Identifying Vehicles In Old Media Properties, part of the International Geophysical Year Extension (IGY-E) events that have been taking place in Geneva, Switzerland, a direct continuation of the original IGY of 1957 to 1958. The paper and its presentation proved to be so controversial that a riot broke out in the City Hostel Geneva where the event was being held, resulting in eleven fingers or finger segments bitten off amongst the 47 participants.
What’s especially maddening about all of this is the fact that not only was Professor Krakenmangoes correct, determining that she is correct is trivially easy, as the episode, The Twisted World of Marge Simpson, from season 8, episode 11, is not hidden or even particularly hard to find.
In fact, references to the vehicle and its accuracy are well documented, with sources noting that the vehicle, which is described in the episode as a “1997 Pontiac Astro Wagon,” appears to actually be a representation of a 1990 to 1996 Pontiac Trans Sport, as in 1997 the second-generation of the minivan was launched, with a significantly different look.
I mean, look how much more boring these things got in the second generation:
Look at that. All the stuff that made these fun is gone. Way to go, GM.
In the context of the episode, the minivan is a prize that is given away via a lottery based on seat numbers, and the winning seat, 0001, is occupied by none other than Springfield’s most notorious wealthy villain, nuclear power plant owner C. Montgomery Burns. It felt like a setup for a wealthy man who certainly needs no minivan handouts, especially compared to the general population of Springfield.
The fans, enraged, fling the complementary pretzels given out by Marge Simpson as a way to promote her fledgling pretzel-vending business at Burns in the futuristic-looking GM minivan, and eventually those same pretzels are used to render baseball Hall of Fame pitcher Whitey Ford unconscious. The incident is described as a “black day for baseball” by one of the announcers.
The van drawn in The Simpsons is really quite an accurate rendering of these striking minivans, and I’m pretty sure it’s a reference to the actual first-generation Pontiac model instead of the Chevy or Olds, as you can see here:
The Pontiac’s distinctive ribbed cladding makes this quite obvious.
I always liked these novel minivans, and I do think the Pontiac has the least compromised styling; of the three versions, it leans the most unashamedly into its futuristic look, and as a result I think is the most successful.
These were very flexible, usable machines, able to seat seven or haul a lot of cargo; I’m not sure GM has managed a series of minivans with as much character as these since.
Want to see the MotorWeek review of the Trans Sport? Sure you do!
It’s unclear what Monty Burns did with his Astro Wagon, but it was never seen again in the show, at least so far. I suspect this lack of any obvious use or interest would only serve to make the angry pretzel-chucking sports fans even angrier.
We had these Pontiacs in Europe! If I am not mistaken they had 2.3 litre 16 valve engines?
I doubt the Dustbusters were objectively any better than the next generation, but at least they wrapped their ’90s GM sadness in something cosmetically interesting. The Uplander we rented at Disney…all the sadness, no redeeming qualities. Everything felt painfully, Yugo-grade cheap. The shifter felt like it would break every time I moved it. Even the click for the turn signals sounded extra tinny.
As a kid, I always wanted my parents to buy one of these and give it a paint job to look like a shuttlecraft from Star Trek TNG. I’ve seen some people do it, but it’s always in a jokey manner on an old beater or a LeMons racer. I want to see a clean version.
The one thing I remember about those minivans was when Car and Driver got one to do a long term test. They drove it for a year, and in the process, broke the windshield.
It cost something like $1400 to get it replaced. That was a truly eye watering sum, just for a windshield, especially in early 90’s dollars. Google says that’s over $3400 today!
“You can call them Whitey Whackers.”
That’s also the episode where Fat Tony and the gang first come into their own as fantastic characters.
AND HEEEEERE COME THE PRETZELS!
I rented a minivan for work once on the big island of Hawaii. When we got to the Avis counter, the young lady behind the counter informed us that our vehicle would be an Oldsmobile Silhouette for the week.
So I immediately asked her, “So it’s not really a minivan, it’s just in the shape of one?”
It took her a couple of seconds, but then she got it.
We managed to put more than 1000 miles on that little dustbuster that week – On an island!
The Cadillac of minivans?
I mean if Chili Palmer has anything to say about it…..
Krakenmangoes and Mango Crackers are definitely upsetting a lot of people these days.
The rear-most seat visibility has to be great in that.
I was recently in the back of my brother’s somewhat new Sienna, and it felt like sitting in a pillbox. Yes, there was plenty of space for my 240lbs back there, but the windows were tiny back there.
The dustbuster is the Cadillac of minivans, after all.
This is probably the best use of the Pontiac “ribbed for your pleasure” design motif. There’s a lot of real estate to spruce up on the slab sides of these vans. Whereas the ribs on many other Pontiacs just resulted in a lumpy looking car.
Great point. It’s especially notable when entering its death throes, Pontiac removed it entirely, resulting in some of its best-looking stuff in a really long time.