So much of America is dealing with tornadoes right now, and preparedness is the key to your best chance at getting through this in one piece. Hollywood likes to depict tornadoes in a certain way. Sadly, the reality is far scarier.
I wrote about what it’s been like to deal with all of the strong storms that Illinois has been slammed by this year. Hoser68:
I was in Alabama in 2011. Something hard to forget. We had 62 tornadoes in a single day. I had 3 go over my backyard. That was a wild day. The storms ate the weather radar and many of the tornado sirens. Cops would sit in their cars in subdivisions and hit their sirens and run to shelter until the storm passed.
The scary part was that my kids were at a friend’s house. They fled to my house when the creek blocked off and flooded their house. An EF5 path was within a mile of that house. All that “finger of God” stuff from Twister is a lie. EF5 damage is not hard to define. It’s easy. Plowed Field. News vans would setup in a plowed field and show pictures of solid brick homes that looked like they had taken cannon fire and a pretty 63 Bubble top Chevy that had been thrown into someone’s yard. What they didn’t realize is that the plowed field was the other half of the subdivision. The EF5 ate the roads, grass, the trees, the houses, and even a couple of the basements. It wasn’t “a Finger of God”, it was an eraser. Whatever was there was gone.
We didn’t have power for 3 weeks after the storm and were trapped with this other family in our house for over a month. The worse part was that the father of this family had legendarily bad breath.
Hopefully you never have to go through something like that. Or at least if you do, you have a crate of Altoids.
Mark wrote a showdown between a 1983 Chrysler LeBaron and a 1993 Dodge Spirit. 96Z26:
I choose the Dodge so that when it inevitably stops working I can proclaim, “My Spirit is broken.”
Brian wrote about a patent for a forklift add-on for a pickup truck. TheDrunkenWrench:
I feel like this is purpose-built for farmers that need to quickly grab bales, but aren’t at the level where they need a dedicated Hay Squeeze.
As a Certified Forklift instructor, I’d like to point out that trying to do any high lift work with something that has suspension at the fulcrum axle, is a recipe for a workplace accident.
This comment reminded me of this video:
Sid Bridge:
This would have saved Vlad the Impaler so much time.
Have a great evening, everyone!
Topshot graphic image: Universal Pictures
As we say in the chase game….
For Your Safety Stay Back
At Least One Town.
Go Max Velocity!
I’ve seen 2 in my life and heard a 3rd. The first May 1997 with the storm that spawned the Jarrel F-5, the 2nd in 2001 that wasn’t really anything crazy, but was shockingly close to my house and the 3rd I heard in 2019. The thing that has ALWAYS bugged me, having been a first person witness to 3, is the description of the sound. The freight train is probably a really easy way to describe it because other people describe it that way and it is easy to analogize, but I think it’s different than that. It’s a sucking sound that is so low that it rumbles.
I was in my house when an EF1 ripped the roof off unexpectedly. no time to get anywhere, threw my son on the floor, jumped on top of him and proceeded to get pelted with what was everything in my house. scariest few seconds of my life. There is no video, no movie, no audio file that can prepare you for the sight and sound of the the ceiling disconnecting from your home like a can tuna being opened. I don’t want to imagine what anything beyond EF1 would look like.
One of my favorite YouTube videos of all time is RojoFern’s “The Scale of Tornadoes.” Amazing video essay that does put these monsters into perspective, while also having a good dose of humor. And when you’re done with that, you can get on with your day…or also watch his stuff on mushroom clouds and volcanoes.
And, yes, been closer to an EF4 than I ever wanted to be. And now live about a quarter mile closer to its track than I did then. That was an unfun couple weeks.
Hooray! Someone recognizes my professional opinion! Now someone may actually call me “Sir”! Without adding, “you’re making a scene”.
Sir, this is a Wendy’s.
I’ll take a spicy chicken, then. ‘Ol Gil is eating good tonight!
Tornado “fun” (/s) fact: when tornadoes form, they are invisible until they form a condensation funnel. If you watch a video of one forming, you can see the debris cone at the bottom before the funnel reaches the ground. But even scarier is the fact that sometimes the condensation funnel never forms. Still not having nightmares? The May 2013 El Reno OK EF5 2.6 mile wide 300 mph winds peed monster was one such tornado. You couldn’t see it coming.
Hoser68, I love that after graphically explaining that an EF5 destroys and scrubs down to well below the surface over swathes hundreds if meters wide you prove that humans are all unreliable narrators by earnestly explaining that after having so much simply erased, living with another family without power, the “worst part” is a disgustingly bad smell. I love it because I understand. It’s not the cake, it’s the damn frosting on top that almost breaks you.
I see your forklift video, and raise you the best forklift safety video ever.
https://youtu.be/TJYOkZz6Dck
It’s a slow burn, but worth the ride to the very end.
Came here to post this. You beat me to it.
That better be Klaus… ah good. Such a classic.
Less well known than his uncle, Sinter. Turns out that not hiring young Klaus into the family business up north was a good move.
The ULTIMATE forklift safety video.
Shake Hands With Danger is also a banger
https://youtu.be/13THQocCkbI
Original song by Jim Stringer
Just… wow. I gotta share that with friends and family.
That was shockingly gripping! 😀