You know what AI-generated art is really good for? Generating images fast. Not good images or accurate images, just fast crap that would have taken a human a lot longer to make, except the human may have decided not to do anything profoundly and obviously stupid, like putting a Toyota Tacoma on merch for Ram or getting the number of stars on the American flag wrong. That’s what AI-generated images are good for: making unusably stupid images with breathtaking speed.
I wish this was a joke, but, sadly, it’s not. Stellantis’ main all-truck-all-the-time brand, Ram, has a big merch store absolutely jam-packed with Ram-themed stuff, like T-shirts and knives and drinking glasses and backpacks and hoodies and probably a colonic kit or whatever. You would think that, since the whole point of the merch is to showcase Ram trucks and promote the whole Ram product identity, the use of, say, Ram trucks instead of, oh, Toyota trucks would be a big deal.
You would think that, but clearly Ram doesn’t seem to think something as trivial as not putting a competitor’s truck on their own merch is a big deal, because look at this shirt that was for sale on their site:
So we have a “2026 RAM PATRIOTIC UNISEX T-SHIRT” here. The 2026 checks out, since that’s the year of our Lord that we are in, and I guess it’s unisex, since it lacks any genitalia, and it definitely is a T-shirt. But the Ram and patriotic part? I’m not so sure. Let’s look at the Ram part:
Wait…is that a Ram? I don’t think so. Look:
That’s a Tacoma. A used Tacoma, even. Ram couldn’t even spring for a new Tacoma to put on their Ram shirts? It’s definitely not a Ram, even if someone or some algorithm slapped a RAM badge on that distinctive Tacoma grille.
And as far as patriotic, well, wouldn’t you expect a patriot to at least know how many stars, and from there, states there are in these wonderful United States of America?
I’m pretty sure we have 50 states, and that flag only has, even assuming there’s some blocked behind that Toyota, 40 stars. Look up there, I did the math. So what states is Ram suggesting we remove? A Dakota? We have three of them, after all, I think. Rhode Island? It’s small, maybe no one will notice. Arizona? Maine? North Carolina? Franklin? Florida? Who knows?
Other folks online noticed these issues as well, and the shirt seems to have been pulled from the site. But it’s not the only thing Ram is selling that promotes a Toyota Tacoma. Want a huge, four-foot banner that shows how much you love America, re-badged Tacomas, and AI bullshit? Boy are you in luck!
Look at that thing, proudly proclaiming that this is Truck Country! Truck Country must be a former Japanese colony, based on their mascot truck:
There’s our Toyota again, wearing the RAM badge. Now just on the off chance that you think we’re being too harsh here, that it really isn’t such a big deal to have some other company’s truck on this banner with the Ram name on it, let me present a little analogy.
What if your kid was really into Hello Kitty, and they wanted a Hello Kitty poster. So you go to the Hello Kitty official merch site, and buy a Hello Kitty poster, and you get this:
It says Hello Kitty but the kitty herself has the head of 1978-era Garfield. Do you think your kid would be fine with that? After all, it’s still a cat, right? And before you say it, no I don’t buy that Hello Kitty is somehow not a cat, so save it.
The point is clearly this would not be okay. Sanrio would never allow such a poster to be sold through any of their outlets. So why does a company that makes tiny stationary sets for little kids have such higher standards than Stellantis, one of the world’s biggest carmakers?
Why is Ram okay with this? It’s absurd! The level of AI slop here is so vast and rich it would feed every algorithmic swine in the world. It’s literally the wrong freaking truck on Ram’s own merchandise. They should feel embarassed as hell.
Remember, this isn’t the first time Ram has made an ass of themselves with AI. Take the L and learn the lesson, dummies. Hire some actual designers to make your damn shirts. Sure, you’ll have to pay them, but they will at least know how many damn states there are in American and I suspect will know which motherclutching truck to put on the damn shirt.
We really living in the stupidest of times. Ram, get your head out of your ass.
Top shot: Ram
The used Tacoma is probably more reliable than anything Stellantis has put out in the last few years.
And worth more.
While a cock-up, it’s not as bad as the “ONE NATION – ONE RACE” T-shirt that IndyCar was selling for a while.
But speaking of mis-matched pickups, our facility had t-shirts made for all of the employees showing artwork of a first-gen Ram truck we have on site. Supposedly. It was very obviously a ’70s F-Series instead, which amused the hell out of all of us.
Wow, I really really want that shirt.
I nearly did a spit-take when I scrolled upon Hello Garfield.
Enough is enough! You should immediately stop singing about RAM parts in your national anthem!
I’ll get my coat…
Always surprising me, Torch. I was NOT expecting to see a reference to the failed state of Franklin (1784-1788). But that may be a North Carolina thing, as y’all killed it!
I’ve actually snuck it in before! https://images-stag.jazelc.com/uploads/theautopian-m2en/CCCCC_map.jpg
Have you actually counted? The first and third rows have 8 stars, but the second and fourth have only 7. The fifth is partly hidden, but let’s assume it has 8.
That would represent the official flag in that the rows have alternating lengths, even if the original has 5 rows of 6 and 4 rows of 5 for a total of 50, while this version has a total of 38 (not 40).
Why is David making Jason crank out articles on his birthday? This is his third one today. Let the man go eat some cake!
Pretty sure this is how he wants to spend it..
Pre-written articles put into the publishing mill for daily posting?
People said the same thing on Thanksgiving!
Because… let him eat cake.
Fuck AI
In addition to AI professing Dodge’s desire to have a taco truck on every street corner, I think it may be starting to edge that logo into vaginal/uterine-diagram territory.
Isn’t the Tesla T logo already there? We drove past a Tesla facility one night and my wife thought it was funny that a gynecologist would have an illuminated sign towering over the interstate.
That one doesn’t jump out at me quite as much, although given Musk’s well-known likeness for 420/69 type references I’m surprised Tesla’s logo isn’t just a big rooster-head in a clamshell.
“Not good images or accurate images”
Yes, it actually can. But it’s like any other tool. you need to use it correctly. One and done prompting doesn’t work.
Assuming you didn’t just make this up for cicks.
A strange accusation. The T-shirt was independently verified as existing on the Ram merchandise store by Motor1. It was removed after it was called out. The banner remained on Ram’s website. I know because I was the one who found it when going through the Ram merch store to see what weird stuff gets sold to Ram fans.
Banner has 54 stars, soooo… states of Insanity, Depression, Denial, and Embarassment would seem appropriate these days.
I don’t see the many stars on any of them. Did you count them or jsut assume 10 per row?
6 rows of 9 stars each on the banner, and 4 rows of about 10 stars on the t-shirt. Once you mail it in, if you are Ram you always will I guess.
Clearly, Stellantis is expressing their opinions RE the status of Puerto Rico, Guam, USVI, and American Samoa, but not the Northern Marianas, because Stellantis DGAF about them
not sayin’ it’s right, but that tracks with 99.9% of folks in the mainland.
I’ve tried to use AI to make some memes for a 3rd generation Colorado pickup and it doesn’t matter what text you use, it always creates images of the 2nd gen trucks. AI ain’t too truck savvy, it seems.
My go-to test for AI is to ask for a classic VW Beetle 4-door sedan.
As a New Englander, I’ll gladly volunteer us to be 6 of the dropped stars.
Let California go and watch the country burn
All the normals are welcome to join us, allowing the remaining states to transcend further into third world status.
I rented a Tacoma a month or so ago and ended up with a Ram. Hmm.
Legit twilight zone. Something’s afoot.
I’ll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missouri!
That’s a classic.
Looks like this was thrown together by someone who is based outside North America and knows nothing about Ram, Dodge or the USA.
Even I would never be caught slipping this badly.
I see and appreciate what you did there.
Wait, did Jatco become self-aware? Is all of this AI slop just cover for the fact that the rise of the machines is actually happening in our transmissions?!
I haven’t looked at Sanrio merch recently, because all of my nieces and nephews are now in their 20s and 30s. In my experience, Jason used a great example of a company that really cares: compared to so much Japanese stuff, plastered with phrases that are almost, but not quite, exactly unlike English, Sanrio goods always used correct English grammar and spelling.
I work in healthcare marketing and it is so heavily regulated. Everything is subject to multiple rounds of reviews, legal approval, etc. Seeing shit like this always gives me a good laugh. AI generated slop, possibly approved by an equally dimwitted AI process. This is the sort of cheap illicit knockoff thing you’d expect to see on Amazon, not directly from the manufacturer.
Congressional districts, states, what’s the difference? Get rid of them. In the 70s a friend had an American flag hung up behind the seats in his Ford Econoline Official Hippie Van. It had 49 stars. Though Alaska and Hawaii became states in 1959 it wasn’t at the same time. For a few months the U.S. had a 49 star flag.
And it’s so geometrically pleasing as well! I’d love to fly a 49 state flag, just to keep a state in my back pocket to disclaim whenever anyone says they’re from there.
Hahaha, perfect. Good on Ram for advertising the superior product.
A little late on the reporting, but hell yeah!
oh damn, i gotta get me one of these lol
You, sir, are on a roll today! I propose it should be Jason’s birthday every day!!
Too much? OK, I’d settle for once a week.
And Happy Birthday!!
Maybe they left out the Confederate states?
Dodge has always been crypto confederate with the “Dodge Rebellion” and that TV show.
Except there were 11 Confederate states.
I think the second and 4th rows only have seven stars, so it’s more like 38.
You forgot West Virginia. 11 states seceded, then West Virginia split off from Virginia and rejoined the Union, so the Union was only down 10 states.
Weird. Now I am beginning to believe my own crackpot theory.
Oh, I see what you mean.
Never mind.
No, General Sherman wasn’t allowed to complete his mission. If he had, there’d be no south today, and we wouldn’t have the problems we currently face.
What I just said. I even wrote a paper on it.
I’m not clear which thing you are replying to, but I think the problem was that reconstruction was thwarted pretty early on. Plus, the 13th Amendment loophole, where non-chattel slavery is still legal if you can convict someone of some crime first.
Much to my disappointment, the proposition to close the 13th Amendment loophole, outlawing involuntary servitude in California, failed. So much for liberal California.
The overlooked fact of history is that many in the North during the Civil War were anti slavery to the extent that they wanted to kill all the slaves.